Beethoven's Christmas Adventure

'Twas three nights before Christmas at the magical North Pole,

and all the new elves had gathered round Santa to be given their roles.

''Toy-making elf!'' Santa decreed to the first one in line,

and to the next, and the next, and the next 209.

But when Santa came to the last elf standing there,

something very different he was to declare!

''Stable elf!'' he proclaimed, expecting a cheer.

''You'll be the one in charge of all things reindeer.

''You'll talk to them and make them all fly.

''The sole keeper of the magic berries

''that carry them into the sky. ''

But a cheer he did not receive.

Nor a smile, nor a chuckle.

Instead, poor Henry's knees started to buckle.

''I don't like reindeer, '' he protested, ''Or any animal, I mean,

''they slobber and shed and are so very unclean. ''

But Santa's mind was made up, that much was clear.

So that night, Henry came up with a plan,

to change his career.

He would make a toy of his own as a secret surprise.

One that will force the big man to see him with new eyes!

But Henry's toy-making skills were a long way from strong

and before he knew it, things went wronger than wrong!

Now, reindeer are well-trained.

They can sit, stay and heel.

But that doesn't mean they'll pass up a free meal.

Henry tried to stop them from floating away,

but only succeeded in falling into the sleigh.

It was a disaster, a catastrophe, a tangled mess

that might never have been unwoven,

that is, were it not for a big, sloppy dog named Beethoven.

Hot chocolate, get your hot chocolate!

lt ' s low in fat and 100% organic.

At least... Not really.

CHRlSTlNE: Mason!

Hey, Mom.

Hot chocolate? Goes to a good cause,

teenagers whose mom ' s won ' t buy them what they want for Christmas.

Yeah, l think l ' m going to stick with my own cause,

moms who think there are more productive uses

of teenager ' s time than video games.

How ' s it going anyway?

Like Grandpa, after the divorce.

A big opportunity just came up at work,

and l ' m gonna need your help with this.

Oh!

Oh, Jesus! Oh, no, no, no! Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Get off me! Come here, come here.

Okay, okay.

Don ' t worry, l think that just means he likes you.

Yeah? Well, the feeling is definitely not mutual!

What ' s this drool machine doing here anyway?

You don ' t recognize him? This is Beethoven.

He stayed in town to star in my commercial.

l need you to watch him while l get everything else ready.

Watch him? But, Mom, l don ' t even like dogs

and it ' s Christmas break, l got my own stuff to do.

Can we talk about this later? l really have a lot l ' ve got to get done.

Yeah, whatever.

Okay!

Here is his bed.

lt ' s in his contract, he has to have it handy anytime he needs it.

Mom, really, l ' m working here,

let it be handy at home.

Okay, sweetie.

Rapidly maturing son of mine.

Oh, sorry!

Don ' t look so glum!

How many other kids your age get to hang out with a celebrity dog?

Celebrity dog?

Yeah, well, that ' s really gonna help me sell hot chocolate.

Come, get your picture taken

with the world-famous celebrity dog, Beethoven!

lt makes a great Christmas gift.

ls that really Beethoven?

Wow. He looks so much more slobbery in person.

Hi! (LAUGHlNG)

Here you go.

l have to give that to my nephew, he just loves Beethoven!

Thank you.

Next, please!

Guess you can do a lot more than just drool, can ' t you?

Beethoven, quiet down. You don ' t want to scare off the customers.

Wait!

Beethoven, stop! What ' s gotten into you?

Don ' t worry, we ' ll be back. Beethoven!

l ' m sorry. God!

Ho, ho. Merry Christmas! There you go.

Thank you.

Merry Christmas.

Ho, ho, ho... Uh-oh.

Wait, wait, wait, wait!

Was that Beethoven?

Ow!

Stupid mutt!

Hey, l think that ' s Beethoven!

Who?

Beethoven, the world-famous dog.

Come on, let ' s get this stuff inside.

There ' s only two more shopping days until Christmas

and l want to squeeze every last penny out of this place.

Go, come on.

All right, l ' m going.

Stop it! Stop doing that! Stop! No, no. No, don ' t!

No!

Oh!

Hey, get back here!

Don ' t tell Santa, okay?

What in the... Hey, hey!

Listen, dog, can you, uh, go get help?

Can you go get your owner, or anybody? Just do it quickly, okay?

Beethoven!

Wow. That actually worked!

Beethoven, what ' s gotten into

you?

Hey, um, do you think you could, uh, help me out of this tree?

lt ' s kind of an...

...emergency!

Um. What if l do something to break your fall? What!

Break my fall? Maybe we can find a solution

that doesn ' t involve the words '' break '' and '' fall! ''

Um... Uh...

Uh, Mason. Mason, okay.

Can l ask,

why are you dressed like a Christmas elf

and what were you doing in that tree?

Well, l ' m dressed like a Christmas elf because

l ' m a Christmas elf!

And, um, as for the tree,

let ' s just say it had something to do with reindeer, Santa ' s sleigh,

and the fact that l ' m probably never allowed in the North Pole again.

Okay, well, um, it was really nice to meet you

and, uh, we really have to get going, okay?

So, uh, come on, Beethoven.

Let ' s go. Let ' s go. Great job, Beethoven.

Got me rescuing an insane guy dressed like an elf.

Look, wait!

Wait!

This Christmas, Beethoven wants you all to consider

giving the gift you can't find in a store.

Rescue a pet from a shelter and give someone a home for the holidays.

And please become a monthly donor to the ASPCA.

Well, what do you think?

l think l like it.

Really? Really!

Christine, l think you hit this one right out of the dog park.

Thank you for this opportunity. Hold on a second!

What if l was to tell you,

that l have another possible promotional opportunity for Beethoven.

What are you talking about?

Well, l spoke with the mayor this morning.

He told me that the town Christmas parade this year is going to be televised.

Anyway, he wants Beethoven to be the Grand Marshal of the parade.

lsn ' t that fantastic?

This could be an enormous opportunity, for the firm and for you.

But Beethoven ' s expected home.

Don ' t you worry about that.

l ' ve already made arrangements with his owners

for all those details.

Cooper, if you do a good job on this,

l think we can pretty much guarantee that promotion is yours.

What do you say? You up for it?

Absolutely, Mr. Rexford. Thank you.

Wait. Wait. Look.

Look. Hey, l need your help all right? Okay?

Um. Look, l don ' t know anyone else here

and l really don ' t know where '' here '' is!

And Santa ' s gonna be really upset if l don ' t...

Okay, look. l ' m not a six-year-old kid anymore.

l know that there ' s no such thing as Santa Claus.

Yes, there is!

And l have to get his magic toy bag back before Christmas.

l think what you need to find is a good psychiatrist.

Maybe a whole team of them.

What? No! No, no, no, l ' m telling the truth!

Ha! See, your dog believes me.

He must ' ve saw me fall out of the sleigh, didn ' t you, boy?

Where did they get him?

What if l can prove that l can understand

what this drool machine is saying?

How are you gonna do that?

By talking to him.

All right.

Let ' s see what we have here. Okay.