American Dad!

Anyone wanna see if I can swallow

this hard-boiled egg without chewing?

- Oh, all right. - Yeah, sure. Why not?

Wait, Jeff! Don't eat that egg!

I just read a shocking expose in the Langley Alt Weekly

about Gentle Goodness Valley,

our brand of supposedly "cruelty-free" eggs.

Apparently, they're not all they're cracked up to be.

Turns out they've been punching the chickens left and right,

just like at the big corporate farms.

Well, who's so high and mighty now?

Ready to switch to my brand?

Never!

Hey, some people keep chickens in their backyard

and get their eggs that way.

- Jeff and I could do that. - You bozos?

That'll be the day.

Yes, Mom, that "ull" be the day.

This time next week, we'll be eating an omelette

made of our very own homegrown eggs, bet on it.

Silence!

The time draws near for the...

Yes, the mail.

With each letter, the promise of a thrilling new adventure.

Let's see.

Inherited a haunted amusement park,

S.O.S. from Mind Quad.

Yeah, these are all big-time duds.

Maybe I'll check my e-mail.

Party time! Excellent!

Everybody, quick! Shut up!

I've been invited to a party at Bullock's house.

Jim J. Bullock? Holy moly!

- No. Avery Bullock, my boss. - Still very cool.

A chance to impress Bullock in a non-work setting

could be huge for me at my non-non-work setting... work.

Want me to come along and be your wingman?

Help you really wow him?

A kind offer, Roger,

but my answer is a harsh and emphatic "no."

I have every confidence I'll knock his socks off

all on my own at this b-b-b-b-b-barbecue?

Summer casual?

Mornin', Smiths!

Well, what do you think?

- Looks great. - Looks awesome.

Perfect BBQ outfit!

- It's horrible! - It's shit! Next!

- It's nice. - It slaps!

- It sucks! - It blows!

- I look like an idiot! - A fool!

It's terrible!

Hated it!

- Stupid! - Get it outta here, Francine!

Yes. Baller as hell. Done.

It makes my shoulders look weird!

Like a monster's shoulders!

For the love of God,

how the hell am I ever supposed to do any work in this house?

Stan, I'm confused.

You've worn casual clothes before.

But I've never felt comfortable in them.

I get so self-conscious about my pointy ankles,

- gentleman's FUPA, and big weird... - Chin.

...knees that wrinkle up and look like the Grumpy Old Men

when I stand.

My body was built for suits.

It's the only thing I feel confident in.

Screw it, I'm gonna wear a suit to the barbecue.

Better to be overdressed than underdressed, right?

Hundred percent. But I don't know...

Summer, summer, summerti-i-me!

Duper, Hooper...

what's shakin'... my babies?

Geez, Stan. Isn't it a little hot for...

Is this corduroy?

Smith, glad you're here,

because I've got your most important mission ever...

Manning the grill!

Raw meat...

So cold...

Feels... good...

Smith?

Are you all right?

'Eyyyyyy.

Oh, my God, look at his FUPA!

And then Duper said, "Oh, my God. Look at his FUPA!"

I made a fool of myself!

And the worst part is Gooper's having

another barbecue this Saturday.

You work with a Gooper?

Yeah, he sits over by the printer,

with Hooper, Booper and Ozymandias.

Stan, I'm about to lay some hard,

earth-shattering truth on you.

You should probably lie down.

Things are about to get crazy real for you.

I'll light some candles and put on some Enya.

Your suit is like armor

for you, Stan.

It gives you confidence, but it's a false confidence

that makes you uptight and overbearing.

You need to find true, easy confidence,

but the suit won't let you.

This isn't really Enya, by the way.

It's just Enya-like.

What you need is a line of custom casual-wear

that you'll finally feel truly comfortable in,

tailored specifically to the contours

of your strange and challenging body.

- And you'd do that for me? - Absolutely!

It'd actually be a nice chance for us to do a little bonding.

Crafting bespoke clothing

- is a deeply intimate process. - I don't know.

Sometimes when we do things like this

- you can get a bit... - Selfless?

Guilty as charged.

I ask absolutely nothing in return.

I'll just have to dust off my old-fashion designer persona...

No dust.

Hold on a sec.

Sir Jennings Cockburn,

fashion titan of post-war London!

Don't breathe that in, Stan.

It's asbestos.

Good morning, my seamstresses.

Imelda, Agnes, Vera, Gooper.

I have a Gooper, too. Martha.

Martha's the one I'm sleeping with.

I always put secret, deeply meaningful little messages

in the lining of all my garments.

When you picture yourself

free of that suit, what do you see?

I'm...

playful.

A goof.

A goose.

A silly goose?

Yes, but also...

unbound by rules and conventions.

Rebellious.

A bad boy.

But still light.

Still playful.

A bad goose.

And now, the moment of truth.

And how do you feel?

Lighter than air!

Roger, how can I ever thank you?

I told you, I ask for nothing in return.

Now go, you're late for your next barbecue as it is!

- But there must be something... - Tell you what.

If you have a good time today,

maybe swing by for a celebratory sherry, how about that?

Now run along, my goose!

My watermelon!

Surprised?

Looks like us "bozos" might see this thing through after all.

So where'd you bozos get all these chickens anyway?

Dicks with Chicks, the local chicken hatchery

owned by brothers Larry and Randall Dick.

And how many eggs have you gotten?

None yet.

The chickens turned out to be a bit more...

aggressive than expected.

But we're making great progress with the little ladies.

The trick is to never show them any fear.

Devil bird!

Well, they're crapping all over the place,

so you can't keep them in the yard.

Ready to give up yet?

- Yes! - Not a chance.

I think we can make this work.

Yeah, I'm just kinda doing the couch potato thing tonight,

watching Hostel 2 with Martha.

Dad?

How was the barbecue?

It was absolutely...

divine!

Oh, Steve, you should've seen me.

I was so easy and fun and free!

Stan, where ya want this puppy?

Me and the guys had such a good time

we decided to keep it going with a little after-barbecue.

To the back yard, boys!

Stan!

Stan! Stan! Stan!

Well, Roger will be pleased.

Wait!

There was something special I was gonna do

if I had a good time today.

A celebratory cannonball!

Rogu, I'm the only thing not burning.

Smith, what's the meaning of this?

This is a non-non-work setting!

Shall we brush up on the agency dress code?

How 'bout we don't and say we did?

What a cool thing to say!

But what if it came from the twisted mind of...

the tickle monster!