The Perfect Man

Holly, you've gotta open up.

I'm not so sure about this.

Come on open the door, tough guy.

Okay.

You look awesome. Turn.

I cannot believe that you talked me into going to the dance.

I thought you said you've been to like, a million schools.

Schools, a million. Dances, zero.

I'll get it.

Go.

It's a simple matter of self-preservation.

I mean, when you move around a lot...

you just don't let yourself get attached.

Much less, make plans to go to school dances.

I hate to break it to you, but in exactly one week...

your streak is officially going to end.

Maybe you're right.

Surprise!

Come in. Jean.

We need to talk.

What?

Jean.

Why? How could you? Jean.

Wait, don't you "Jean" me. Just calm down. Please, calm down.

We can be civilized about this.

I'll be right back.

Civilized?

Just calm down. No, why are you telling me this?

Are you in love with her? She meant nothing to me.

Well, technically, they meant nothing to me.

"They"?

"They?"

Look on the bright side. It's out of my system.

Have a nice day.

Explain this to me again.

Patsy's back.

It's packing time.

Does this mean you're not going to the dance?

We'll be gone by the end of the week.

I'll stay in touch.

Bye.

I'll miss you.

Where are we going this time?

There's a spot open at Dolores' bakery.

You know, I've always wanted to go there...

and you kids will love Brooklyn.

It's time for a new adventure and...

I'm sorry, honey.

I know you were finally making some friends here.

It's no biggie.

There's friends everywhere. Right?

Hey, all you bloggers. It's me.. Girl on the Move.

Well, here's a big shocker.

My mom got her heart broken. Again.

Yep, we're starting off on another big adventure.

That's my mom's word for running away.

"T-l-C" Tic.

Trick.

Stick.

Come on, little Miss Mary Sunshine.

Play the game. Give us a word with "tic" in it.

Fine.

Tragic.

Fantastic.

Pathetic.

Ecstatic.

Thank you.

Sarcastic.

Psychotic.

It's genetic.

By some miracle...

my mom only got one speeding ticket the whole way.

It's Miss Jean Hamilton.

Are you married?

He should write her a ticket for reckless flirting.

Wow!

I will say one thing, though.

For those of you who haven't done it yet...

put "Must see New York skyline"...

on your list of things to do before you die.

Oh, wow!

Oh, girls!

I bet it's full of quaint details, pretty moldings on the ceilings...

and old hardwood floors.

And charming little rat droppings in the breakfast nook.

How delightful. Cut it out.

It's going to be perfect.

The sad thing is, I'm actually getting good at this.

If all else fails, I have a very promising future...

as a professional mover.

Our new apartment has history and character.

And exotic local wildlife.

My mom calls it home.

I call it the Witness Relocation Program.

Mommy, look!

There it is. (Jean) I told you.

The same one as in Wichita.

It still comes out every night.

Even in hard times.

To remind us that every day holds the potential for beauty.

It's getting late, and I'm wiped.

So, time to hit the sheets.

Even though I have no idea which box they're in.

Keep reading my on-line journal for more days...

in the life of a teenage gypsy. I'll be here.

The same me, just a different zip code.

No! That's it! I'm not going. You go with him.

Sorry.

Check her out. (Amy) Hey, you.

Yeah, you.

How much your kicks cost you?

What?

I paid $50 for mine.

You? Free.

I pulled them out of a garbage can somewhere in Portland.

You win.

See you, freak.

Hey, you're new here?

Yeah, how'd you know? Your skin.

My skin looks new? It looks virgin.

No piercing, no tats.

See, us Brooklyn girls, we lose our skin virginity by fifth grade.

In fifth grade, I was just learning long division.

Attention, all students.

Check in with your homeroom monitor each day...

That stinks.

You're going to have to take your yearbook photo...

with all the losers who missed it in the fall.

I don't do yearbook photos.

You have no choice.

It's like taxes and death.

Mandatory pain. If you don't do it yourself...

they'll hunt you down like an animal and force you to smile.

Not if I'm not here anymore, they won't.

I'm so glad you came. (Jean) Thanks.

Now, we keep the mixers in the back.

But I got to warn you, they're all older than God.

They don't really mix very well...

they just kind of move things around.

So I hope your manual mixer's in real good shape.

And watch out for our no-good oven.

It's worse than that one in Chapel Hill.

Off by a good 10 degrees.

Well, you know me.

I'm off by way more than that. Yes, you are.

And this is Gloria. Gloria, this is Jean...

the one I was telling you about. Really nice to meet you.

Likewise.

Do you know anything about wilting rose petals?

The fondant's too soft.

You need to add more cornstarch.

See, I told you she was good.

No wonder my rum cakes always look so drunk.

Help me. I like you.

You never eat the cakes?

You made it on time? Yeah, I'm here.

Attention, all students.

Talent show auditions will take place...

this Friday evening in the auditorium.

Come on out and show us what you got.

That's my seat.

Is there assigned seating?

No, but-- Why don't you take one of those?

I don't like sitting up front.

Me, neither.

isn't it big?

It's gorgeous! It's so heavy.

I need a crane to lift my finger.

Well, baby, if he's any good at all...

you'll never have to lift a finger again.

I'm so glad I listened to you.

He was a customer.

Dolores coached me through the whole thing.

When to give him an extra doughnut, when to hold back.

You never told me that. (Dolores) I told you.

You just didn't want to listen.

So I've had a few bad relationships.

Honey, if ex-boyfriends were dollars...

you'd be loaded by now.

Now, baby, what you gotta do is--

Mom, what you gotta do is sign my enrollment form.

4:00 already?

Girls, this is my daughter, Holly.

Hi. I'm going to get my purse.

Look at you! All grown up.

Got your little speed bumps and everything.

Welcome to Brooklyn, Holly.

See you girls tomorrow.

Don't embarrass her. (Dolores) I've known her for so long.

So, tell me. How was it?

It was good. Tell me more.

Excuse me, real quick, I was just, I was over here.

I was just wondering, did it hurt at all?

Did what hurt?

When you fell. You know, from heaven.

'Cause I was just thinking with a face like that...

you gotta be an angel, right?

Has that line ever worked for you?

Well, I got you to laugh, right? That's Step One.