Patel Ki Punjabi Shaadi

'From India's western coast'

'comes a simple story.'

'The land of Gathiya, Garba and Gandhi.'

'No, sir. This isn't a story from Gujarat.'

'In fact, this housing society'

'is like a mini Gujarat right in the city of Mumbai.'

'The Gujaratis are cocky by nature.'

'Be it Manhattan or Mumbai, '

'it's like they're carrying a portable Gujarat wherever they go.'

'Dipti, Jigna, Dipesh are the names

that reverberate 'in this Gujarati neighborhood.'

'Now amid all this lives a family'

'dripping with courtesy, culture and clarified butter.'

'The Hasmukh Patel house, '

'nestled in the cold storage of culture and values.'

Here's your half a kilo of wheat. Hold on a second.

Come on, Mr. Patel, four extra grains won't kill you.

- Sir, I'm doing this for you. - For me?

Of course. Because you're such a virtuous man

you can't digest even a single ill-gotten grain.

These are four grains. Too much sin to handle, right?

For every Gujarati, business is next to righteousness.

It's not about money, you know.

That will be 34 rupees. Here you go, ma'am.

Let's go, Raksha.

- Sir. - Hmm?

Stop dreaming and focus on your business.

Mark my words, boy. Someday, I'll start Patel Supermarket right here.

Hold your dreams

for you have a housing society meeting to attend.

- Is it today? - Of course.

Mr. Patel, you've got a letter from Canada.

I've warned you umpteen times not to hand me this letter!

Sir, you need to calm down. Let's go.

- Hail... - Glory to Gujarat!

My friends, I've brought you today a special gift from Gujarat.

- Ghaari from Surat. - No way.

Red chillis from Gondal?

Shouldn't we Gujaratis think about something else than food?

I bring you the soil of Gujarat.

We have to spread this soil in our courtyard.

Here.

Who pays the most taxes in India?

- The Gujaratis. - You are right.

Who built the Rajabai Tower in Mumbai?

The workers, of course.

Damn! Who paid the workers?

- The Gujaratis. - Yes!

Who made 'Raja Harishchandra' the first movie in India?

Dadasaheb Phal ke.

But he was a Maharashtrian.

Who financed Phalke?

He was financed by Mayashankar Bhatt

who was a Gujarati.

We have Goddess Amba as well as the industrialist Ambani.

Hail Gujarat!

Someday, Gujarat will take on China singlehandedly.

In producing children?

In producing jobs and business, do you get it?

Yet, there's a big trouble looms large over us.

TV channels, e-mail, Facebook, Twitter.

These new age things are attacking our culture

and we must save our culture and defend our pride against them.

Like you know,

we don't allow liquor and meat in the Adarsh Gujarati Society.

We will never allow flirting

and whistling in this society either.

What about the cooker whistle?

Cooking is fine, but no looking.

And very important thing.

We won't let Western channels on our TVs that promote their culture.

- Come on, man! - No English channels! You got it?

Morons!

Come on, grandma! Yo!

Yo, grandma!

What a fabulous speech!

Straight from the Red Fort.

Why are you acting like a traffic cop all of a sudden?

Ramdev Baba says

that these exercises keep all the diseases away.

Why don't you try?

Ramdev Baba on MTV?

For today.

Aren't you too old to watch MTV?

You should watch channels like Aastha, Sanskar.

We got two young girls in our house. Try to understand.

We got two daughters,

- but we also got 90 channels. - Enough.

Feast on "Naked TV" only for today.

I'm going to band them from tomorrow

- But dad... - Don't "daddy" me.

Gosh, you got some outdated ideas!

Every young girl's father follow outdated ideas.

Till this day.

After all, she lost her mother.

Remember Pat Singh who stormed into our lives

and turned our lives upside down with his Punjabi beats.

How could you forget?

Hasmukh, you're still brooding over Pat Singh.

Forget about it.

You should change with time.

You are snatching their freedom.

Paola.

Hi. You are Kanu and I am Pooja.

You are a tortoise and I'm a nobody.

Yet there's a lot that's common to us.

The world is in fast and furious mode, but we're painfully slow.

You can't speak

and I'm not allowed to speak.

You can live till hundred.

My life is already boring, as if I've lived till hundred.

- Pooja. - Sister.

You are talking to Kanu again!

What are you doing?

I think Champaben is more lucky than us.

She can at least roam around all day.

See. You know what?

There is nothing like freedom. Ting-tong.

You'll be all alone after my marriage, right?

Right, Nimisha.

That's why I've decided that I'll speak to dad today about that.

Paola.

Fashion design?

Dear, you are so naive.

Girls from decent families don't choose this field.

- Not allowed. - But I'm bored, dad.

I've finished my BA through correspondence.

What should I do in my life?

Get married.

Listen to me.

These three things are very important in a girl's life.

Look, book and cook.

You are good at all three of them.

- Dad, may I ask you something? - Hmm.

When I was born

and spoke for the first time,

did that make you happy?

Of course.

No. Either you lied to yourself that day

or you're lying today.

That's not true, my dear.

What's so big deal about fashion designing?

I wore pajama and kuna all my life.

Did it kill me?

But the time is changing, dad.

Just think.

I'll become a famous fashion designer.

Celebrities and stars will attend my show.

People will give me a huge round of applause.

I'm sure, you will say,

"This is the right choice, baby."

Presenting the creations by

Ms. Paola Patel.!

- Stop it. - Please.

Pooja Panel's ramp show destroyed our culture.

Is it a fashion show or a strip show?

Should we blame Pooja and her family values for this?

No, my daughter is innocent!

What's wrong?

I won't let you pursue fashion designing.

What's wrong with that?

I think the word "design" is of Gujarati origin.

"Design" sounds like "Dishaheen".

That's aimless.

I won't let my daughter become aimless.

My dear...

Don't let that spoil your mood.

Let's eat some 'khakra'.

Have some. It will cheer you up.

You know l don't have anyone

but two daughters to call my own.

We got a dandiya dance in our society tonight.

Dandiya. Don't you want to play?

Quickly get ready.

Smile, my dear.

Please smile.

"Hey, Rupa, come upstairs, I've to go early."

"My henna is burning up, moonlight, stop shining."

"Your cool..."

"Your sweet..."

"Your cool soothing light makes me restless."

"Moonlight, stop shining."

"My eyes..."

"My eyes say it all."

"Moonlight, stop shining."

"The courtyard seems desolate..."

"My father's affection stops me at every step."

"Oh dear moon."

"My veil.."

My veil slips from my head, moonlight, stop shining."

"Come on, everyone."

"1.. 2.. 3.. let's get free later."

"With the devotion towards the powerful Goddess"

"the night illuminates bright."

"Residing in the skies."

"The ever green merciful."

"Goddess, bless us always."

"The oceans and the mountains"

"all of them bend at Your feet."

"Folding my hands, I bow down to you."