Short of Love (矮仔多情 / Ngai chai dor ching) (矮仔多情)

There is a saying in Hemingway's "The Old Man and the Sea".

The sea and women are mysterious, irritated and dangerous.

Oh, | make it wrong.

Hemingway never said that.

Well... whatever, everybody makes mistakes.

Especially, when you are facing the sea and come across a tsunami.

Jack, what... what do you...

think about the stock market?

The index is gonna drop a bit

and surely reaches 30,000 at the year end.

It'd be better for you

to privatize your firm at a lower price.

Don't worry.

Send my regards to Lisabella. Bye, Richard.

Mr. Lan...

Are you disabled? Why didn't you knock the door first?

How long have you been working here?

3 days, Fanny got miscarriage because of your harshness.

She quitted. Then you hired me.

What is it?

Tonight, you are gonna have dinner with Mr. Ho at 8...

Cancel it.

Meeting with Mr. Lau at 9...

Cancel it too. At 10...

Are you Parkinson? Don't you know what | am saying?

| am not available tonight.

| have 4 parties, 8 models,

16 actresses waiting for me. Understand?

You'd have told me you are a sex-addict though.

What kind of attitude is this? Why would I hire you?

I'd have fired you in 3 days.

What's your salary?

| will tell you if you raise my salary.

And... you should take off your shoes as you come into my room.

| am not used to look at women at this angle.

Except on bed.

What's wrong?

No response? Why would it keep selling?

Are you retarded?

Get me the best computer technician!

Be calm! | am PhD of C.S. in M.I.T.

Why didn't you tell me when | hired you? Hurry up!

| did write it in my resume.

You just kept talking to your gals on the phone during the interview.

It's the Automatching System you installed 3 years ago.

A password is needed to cancel it.

Any password clue?

Yes, your girlfriend's name.

You said you will love her forever and you'd marry her too.

| used to make these promises to all my girlfriends.

3 years ago? | can't even remember my girlfriend's name from 3 days ago.

It seems to be...

Barbara? Erica? Veronica?

Don't worry! It's done.

Turn on again?

There's a 168 hours power back-up for my computer.

Even you break it,

all the trade orders will be transferred to other stock markets.

So cool? Who's the genius writing this program?

It's me. | am not too bad myself.

| am from M.K.S.W.C.T.L.

What's it?

Mong Kok Shun Wo Ching Ting Lo .

That's how | sold all my stocks,

and even doubled short selling.

However, Lehman Brothers filed for bankruptcy that night.

The global stock markets collapsed.

A week ago, if | didn't make this mistake,

| would be a dead meat in this tsunami.

In this historic financial tsunami,

| can be the survivor and big winner,

just because | am fluke.

Come back, honey!

| want to eat you. We want to eat you.

Again? Why do you two have such a good appetite?

Okay... Coming...

To celebrate my fluke,

I lied to my girlfriend Chu-chu, I bought a new yacht

and hang out with Ding and Dong

for 72 hours.

| want to eat you.

No way, | want to eat you first.

It's pear. Not you, try again.

You...

Where are you two from?

It's tedious to peel off the skin!

Am | serving you or you two serving me instead?

When will we go ashore?

| feel very seasick.

| am already rich,

for such poor services of you, Honey.

You two will be poor forever.

Just eat yourself!

Sell it... Shit!

Hello, who is it?

Babe, you are not coming back?

Chu-chu, it's quite disastrous here in States.

Many big financial firms are closing down.

| am almost gone mad. Hold on a second...

| said sell them all! Do you understand?

Are you listening to me? You stupid American!

| have hardly slept for an hour in 2 days.

Poor babe!

| will come back once it's settled.

| will give you a big surprise, okay?

How big?

Shockingly big!

I'll hang up now. Okay.

Bye...

See, women are so gullible.

You just have to keep giving them surprise.

And they will always have hope in you.

Chouette watches for you two! Surprise!

Happy? Happy...

As my great grand father-in-law said,

it's not guilty for a man to cheat,

but if you don't give compensation to your wife,

that's doubly guilty!

Sir, this 8-carat round-shaped diamond

is new stuff.

8 carat? Affection means much more.

Have you got smaller ones?

Like 0.0008 carat ones? Do you have?

Why are you so frightened?

| am a customer, not a robber.

Alright... 8-carat then. Take the card...

Why are you still so frightened?

It's so expensive, how could you pay by card?

| could even buy a 16 million yacht by card.

This diamond is smaller than your nostril. Why can't | pay for this?

What if it can?

Are you gonna get nude on the street?

Wasting my time.

Mr. Lan. What now, Connie?

Are you losing your memory?

You keep calling me every 33 minutes.

Did you get ashore?

How many times have | told you?

| am getting off from a plane, not from a boat.

Don't let anyone know that | was on board.

Are you using the car today? It needs to be checked today.

| have 19 cars. Which one is you talking about?

| don't know.

Fanny just left a memo for it.

Okay... Check them all.

All?

Napoleon said,

war is like musical chairs for winners and losers.

You never know when you will be kicked out,

and step up to the guillotine.

These ignorant financial scum

will be screwed

without knowing anything.

It's stuck... give it back to me...

Give it back to me...

Hello.

Is Mr. Jack Lan here?

We are calling from the card center.

| am his... fiancee? What is it?

Please let him know his Diamond Card has already been overdraft.

Overdraft? His card is temporarily invalid.

He needs to clear his debt asap.

My 8-carat!

No...

The no. you dialed can't be reached at the moment.

Please try again later. Madam!

Someone is towing the cars outside.

Tow?

Miss, please sign here. We need to take the cars back.

Why?

We don't make the orders, we just follow them.

We are ordered to take the cars back.

Please sign here.

Are you mistaken? Drive that car away.

It's such a chaos.

These Lehman's victims are going mad.

They are trying to break through the security line.

Both sides are pushing against each other...

Give it back to me!

Give it back to me!

All Lehman's victims want to get their money back.

Give it back to me!

What are you doing?...

Where're my cars?

What's going on?

Break-in? It's good that you are back.

Chu-chu! What's happening?

Chu the hell!

| told you not to call me Chu-chu.

You bad mouth! Just keep calling me Chu-chu.

You such a midget pig!

| have been putting up with this for long.

For God's sake, you are screwed by the Lehmans.

Card is overdraft, cars get towed

and you cried the hell out on TV.

It's really a BIG surprise!

Johnny.

| am coming over, see you at the airport.

Bye. Love you!

What's up? Do you think you are the only one who cheats?