Camp Crasher (Campamento con mamá)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SON!

TODAY WE WORK

BLOCKED

CAMP CRASHER

RAMI

PENDING THIS ACCOUNT IS PRIVATE

FOLLOW THIS ACCOUNT

Come on!

Come on! All the way.

No. Go!

Stop!

-What are you doing? He can't drive. -I can.

You'll hit something, "I can."

Stop.

Stop!

What are you doing?

Is this a joke?

-No. -Move! Come on!

-You make me nervous, Patricia. -Yeah.

I could have done it too.

-Oh, shit. -Oops.

Sixty years driving, and he gets nervous.

You make him nervous.

How am I supposed to look at you?

-Who am I looking at? -Don't overexert yourself.

I'm multitasking. I'm rehearsing.

Why can't I see Rami's photo?

Wise up, Patri.

What?

No.

He must have pressed the wrong thing. He's clumsy.

He didn't block his aunt.

Leave that hobby.

Acting isn't a hobby.

Act as a Logistics Manager.

Is the urine sample truck at 39 °F?

Yes, miss.

Sure? Don't let the samples arrive frozen like the last time.

-See why he blocks you? -Back to work.

Hey!

Come on. Relax a bit.

Go for a massage, a course, a workshop.

Sure. I'll have a look.

Origami or bonsai course in the Japanese Garden.

-Okay. -Who will run the company? You?

Take a vacation, Patricia.

Dad didn't.

-How old was he when he died? -Wanna kill me?

He didn't die from stress. He smoked a lot.

You can't please him. He named his company "Pomiró and Sons."

He only had daughters!

That man was your dad.

He worked his whole life so you could study theater.

Get out. I'm busy.

Do all big sisters inherit the baggage?

Do something for yourself just once.

Let go of the responsibility.

Whoosh yourself! Out! Whoosh!

-Leave, Carlita. -Fine.

Rami!

I'm home!

Ramiro!

Rami!

Rami.

Oh, shit! Ramiro!

Ramiro! Hey!

What?

What? Tidy up the mess you make, man!

Close the things you open! Just one! Come on!

If I had a gamer room, I wouldn't mess up the house.

Sure! A gamer room! A zombie room!

No way.

Help me out, Rami. Please.

Take a shower, Rami.

-Shower! -I'm not a kid. Don't boss me around.

You don't do it unless I tell you.

I don't want to.

"My body, my decision." You taught me.

Your ears too, Rami.

No way! No!

You didn't tidy your room. It's a mess.

-Are you listening? -Yes, I'll do it later.

Yeah, later.

Listen, I'll leave your bag on the bed.

-I bought you sunscreen. -All right!

And also, a blanket. It gets cold at night.

Don't wait until last minute to pack.

Do we have insect repellent?

Enough, Mom! How would I know?

SHE'S UNBEARABLE

DO YOU WANT ME TO TALK TO HER?

I TOLD HER. SHE AGREES.

All right, great, son.

Move in with me straight after camp.

-Shit. -Kisses. Love you.

All right, great, son.

Move in with me straight after camp.

Kisses. Love you.

Want to put on your playlist?

What's that one you like?

In the Benz, the driver is driving

No, Mom. He isn't a driver. He's a singer.

"Ferxxo," with double X.

"Ferxxo"? Is he well-known?

What color do you want for the gamer chair for your room?

I saw one in red, but we can make it in two colors.

Red and black.

Don't worry, Mom.

The color is secondary. It should be comfortable.

You're going to be spending a lot of time there.

Butterfly kiss?

No, Mom.

-Stop it. What are you doing? -You used to like it.

Have a nice day.

I love you.

I'm going to give him a gamer room. A proper one.

I'll cook his favorite food every day. He's gonna eat so many burgers.

He can watch Netflix at will. Series with kids messing up.

-He'll go to bed at any time. -Great.

We were having a shitty time, but it's normal.

Isn't it?

I don't know.

I'll persuade him to stay with me.

-Let him have the experience. -Fuck the experience.

Let him be with his father.

-And I fail as a mother? -One thing doesn't imply the other.

Let's get that chair.

-Please. -It's going to be all right.

-Where should I start? -I don't know about it.

-Go online! -Okay. I'll do it.

My God! What do I write? Gamer chair, right?

Rami, look at what I bought for you.

I don't need it.

Yes, it was on the list.

But Dad gave me his.

But you might run out of batteries, and you can use this. Here.

Hey. To share on the trip.

-What about my cavities? -Brush your teeth. Here.

Thank you.

-What? I have some. -But these are boxers.

Didn't you say you wanted to stop wearing briefs?

Mom listens when you talk. Look.

I wrote "Rami" on them.

I packed some at the bottom.

Underwear goes on the sides for any emergency.

What emergency?

Let me pack my things, please.

All right. I'm sorry. Can't I help you now?

Come on, Rami.

You'll be away for a few days. I want to be with you and help you.

I don't get it.

You don't talk to me. You used to kiss me.

You came to my bed and gave me cuddles.

You don't look at me.

What do you need? Mom's here.

Leave me alone, please. Okay?

Thank you.

Is there anything you want to tell me?

About what?

Anything.

Well, yes.

That if you see me packing, let me pack it my way.

Don't tell me where to put my underpants.

Same with everything.

You always say something. It's annoying. We must do everything your way.

-I'm 30 years older than you. -See?

At school I'm called a mommy's boy.

They say you have me on a leash.

Who said that? I'll choke him.

I'm joking. Don't listen to those dummies.

Mom, I want to do things how I think is best.

Is it that hard?

I'll get a glass of water. Do you want one?

Yes.

The key is to have fun. It'll be a great experience.

Wear sunscreen. The sun is much stronger.

You don't notice. Nights are cold.

I put an insect repellent, and a little bag…

-Okay. Enough. -Perfect.

-Hi, Bauti. -What's up?

-Hi, Meri. -Hello.

-There's Patri. -Hello.

-Hello. -Hello.

-Patri. -How are you?

-Lovely bump. -See? I know.

-Nearly there. -Nice.

Today's the day. How exciting.

Yes, today's the day… I give you hell.

Come here.

-What did you tell Ramiro? -What do you mean?

He wants to move in with you when he gets back.

-Yes. What do you…? -Don't play dumb, Walter. Sorry.

Before becoming your husband, he was mine.

No problem.

We should have talked about it first as the adults we appear to be.

He specifically asked me to let him ask you.

Just him, he told me. I thought it was very mature on his part.

He didn't say anything to me.

What do you mean?

I asked for his pillow and his quilt, and you sent them to me.