Mr. D

Oooh.

Oh!

Five more minutes to answer

the questions please.

Keep working.

All right.

There we go.

- Faster. - Okay.

Little faster, come on.

You can go faster than that, come on. Faster.

Sir, try with your eyes closed.

Ugh!

Ohhh, agh!

Eyes shut? Maya, seriously?

It's my teaching hand.

Okay, let's take these...

That's enough.

Give me one sec.

Okay, all right.

Sorry.

Okay, hold on a sec.

I just need to sit down for one second.

Put that away.

Oh, my God.

Oh, that's so sore.

Before we get started,

special surprise...

I don't know how many of you

have heard of the Summit Series.

1972, Canada vs. Russia.

We won.

I wasn't born.

But, before I was

my father started collecting signatures...

Of the most famous team in Canadian history.

- You have them all? - All but one.

I'm only missing,

perhaps the most famous on this team.

Paul Henderson, who scored

the most famous goal

in the entire series.

But I'm in luck, because tonight

he's doing a signing in town.

And I'm going to get it signed.

What about parent/teacher interviews?

That's what I need to talk to you guys about.

So, a lot of you have signed up

for me to speak to your parents.

And really, to be honest,

you're all doing really well this year.

And you're really good kids.

Wonderful children.

So, what I'm going to say is this:

I only want to see the parents

of those students...

Who have less than a 55 average.

Aw, man, mine's a 53%.

Now it's 55.

Nice.

Okay, there's one less set

of parents I need to see.

Well, my parents will still want to come.

Why Maya, you come every year,

they don't need to come.

You have a 97 average.

You could practically teach the course.

Just stay home, you're doing great,

you know that. I don't need to see them.

Well, my parents won't be coming.

No, Jimmy, they won't

because even your parents

have given up on you.

I will leave this here at the front, take a look.

This shirt is worth a lot of money,

but after tonight...

Once I get Paul Henderson to sign it.

It's going to be priceless.

Oh, there he is.

Love machine.

How was the big date last night?

Pretty great, I must confess.

Give me the dirt.

Simon, a gentleman

doesn't kiss and tell.

Whoo, real steam room, huh?

You have no idea.

She did this thing with her neck.

What are you guys talking about?

Oh, just the date I had last night.

Ooh, how did it go?

It was hot.

Really? Who's the lucky lady?

- His mom. - My mom.

Really?

You okay with that Simon?

No, I'm not okay with it.

I'm great with it!

I don't know.

Great.

That's great.

How long have you guys been seeing each other?

Only a week, but it is getting pretty intense.

Really intense.

It's like we're on a one way express trip

to lustville.

Woo Woo!

- All aboard. - Wow.

Chug-a-chug-a- chug-chug-a-chug-a-chug.

Okay. Wow,

that's a lot to take in.

That's what my mom said.

Yeah, I'm just going to go

scrub my brain.

- Okay. - Why do I engage?

- Prude. - Simon, are you sure

you're okay with it? 'Cause I just

wouldn't want things to get weird between us.

I know what you mean. Don't worry,

brothers before mothers. Like they say.

I'm not familiar with that.

I'm happy for you. Pound me.

One per family.

All right, thanks for doing this.

No sweat, man.

I need you to hold my spot in line.

Yeah. Man, you couldn't find anybody else to do this?

No, I tried everybody else, all right?

All right,

you know the value of this?

- Yeah, very valuable. - And how important it is,

- to my dad and I. - Yeah.

- Precious cargo. - Okay, keep it up like that.

Keep it flat.

Yeah, okay, I'll keep it flat.

- Flat. Perfect. - I'll keep it perfectly flat.

- No, what are you doing? - I just want to see.

Don't open it. Don't open it.

You just had a grilled cheese.

I did... it's fine.

Oh, my gosh.

You're stressing me out, Bill.

Check this out.

It's pretty sweet man.

Put it back!

Oh! What are you...

You are not worthy.

- It's okay, it's okay. - What are you doing?

Oh, come on, it's fine.

And you just throw it on there, like that.

- It's fine. It's just a jersey. - You can't take this.

I can't trust you.

Hey, Lisa! Hey, it's Lisa!

- No, don't. - Hi, Gerry.

Bill want's to say hi.

Bill.

Hey, Lisa.

Oh, God.

Wow.

- A Team Canada '72 jersey. - Yup.

Signed by the whole team?

Everyone except Paul Henderson.

That's impressive.

And guess where Henderson's gonna be tonight.

In town,

autograph signing.

I'm going to bring it and I'm going to get it signed.

Too bad about the parent/teacher interviews.

Too bad if I didn't have a principal

who loved sports and let me go do this.

Duncan, I feel your pain, I really do.

But, these parents pay good money

for their kids to come here.

They need to know that it's worth it.

I understand that.

How about if I get done early? Can I go early?

All right, you get through all the parents

that have come to talk to you.

So, every parent that is on the sheet?

As long as I see them

I can go get this signed?

And thank you.

Thanks what?

Well, this is fantastic,

thank you so much.

It's not for you.

Are you crazy?

Hey, Gerry, cool flag.

- Hey, Simon. - Hey.

What can I do for ya?

Nothing.

Lot of work to do.

So...

You're always working.

I'm vice principal,

busy, busy.

There's a weird dog outside with no tail.

They say it's born that way, but I don't think so.

You want to go take a look?

Tell you what buddy,

maybe after I get my work done,