I Know This Much Is True

Can you take care of your brother, huh?

From the day you were born, you were my strength.

I love your brother so much.

I don't know why that you would do that right now.

I need you to stand up for me for once.

- (SCREAMS) - (GROANS)

Promise me, Dom.

Are you the social worker?

I'll take care of him, Ma. I'll take care of him.

Thomas and I have been to three different states...

Massachusetts, Rhode Island, and New Hampshire.

Four, counting Connecticut.

In less than half an hour, we'll be in a new state, New York.

Because we're on the third grade field trip

to the Statue of Liberty.

Ma told us when we ride on the ferry,

we'll see the exact same view our grandfather saw

when he first came to this country in 1913.

Oh, you don't have one?

Can I have one of those?

Ma was always talkin' about her father.

She says he was a great man, but I never knew him.

He died before we were born.

We're about halfway there

when my brother gets up to use the bathroom.

He's probably gonna stink up the whole bus

and make everyone gag.

Don't get anything on ya!

Dominick: My brother ruins everything.

Five minutes go by and he's still in there.

It's stuck!

I heard him flush a long time ago.

Dominick, help, help!

He's probably poopin' all over.

I feel bad for him.

And mad. And humiliated.

Kids are looking at me, too, not just Thomas.

"The Birdsey brothers, identical twin retards."

It smells like a pile of shit in there.

What's going on? It came through the door.

What's going on? All right, you guys, you guys.

Come on, sit down. What's going on here?

Thomas is locked in the bathroom.

Thomas. Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Calm down, listen to me. Push the lock,

grab the lock, and flick it to the left.

- Click it to the left. It's not working!

What a weirdo!

Bus driver! He's pulling his pud in there!

Can you pull over? - (BRAKES HISSING)

You just gotta move the bolt and the handle together.

All right, everybody settle down.

- Could you just stop that? Diarrhea'd on me.

What's his name? - Thomas.

- Thomas? Thomas. Can you please sit down?

Try to move the... the bolt and the handle together to the left.

Please! Please! - It's stuck.

Teacher: Can you just pull it open?

No. It opens from the inside.

Can you just use... No, I understand that.

- I understand that. That weirdo!

- My 2-year-old brother could open the door. - I think it's stuck.

Teacher: I have a bus full of kids.

We need to get on the ferry by 10:45 or we're gonna miss...

I will... I will call the bus company.

They'll have to come down here with the tools and fix it.

It may take two hours. It may take three hours.

- (CLATTERING) Get him out!

Calm him down. Everybody, sit down.

Bus moves. Please sit down.

- Bus moves. - Okay.

Come on. We're gonna miss the ferry.

Dominick: Everyone's disappointed.

We're gonna stop at the side of the road...

The day is ruined.

- We're heading to a gas station to call for help... Sit down, please.

When this know-it-all, Eugene Savitsky,

walks to the back of the bus with an idea.

Teacher: Eugene, you've gotta sit down.

Eugene, sit down. - Have him push it to the right.

Yeah, but the lock is to the left.

Yeah, but maybe he doesn't know the difference

between the right and the left.

The right and the left. Okay, all right.

Hey, Thomas, let's try something different, okay?

Try pushing it to the right, the lock.

To the right. The other way that you were.

Finally!

Okay?

Come on, let's go out.

Hey!

Eugene, can you switch seats with Dominick, please?

Thank you. Dominick, come on.

Let's go sit by your brother.

You okay?

Thomas, you okay?

All right. We're almost there, guys.

For the rest of that whole long day,

Thomas acts really out of it.

Just sit down, please. We're gonna miss the ferry!

No, we're not gonna miss the ferry.

We are not missing the ferry. We're fine.

Please, sit down. Please, sit down.

Nobody uses the bathroom anymore!

At the harbor, Thomas tells Miss Hanker

he feels too nervous to get on the ferry to the statue.

So she makes me stay behind with him and the bus driver.

That night,

I dream I'm trapped in a small, dark cave

in a woods I don't recognize.

It's pitch dark.

I bang and cry for help and when, at last,

I discover a way out, I realize

I've not been trapped in a cave at all

but inside the Statue of Liberty.

Wake up, sleepyhead.

Hi.

You'll never guess who called yesterday.

Who?

Who called?

Connie Chung.

Joy: She wants to interview Thomas.

Jesus Christ.

What? It's a pretty cool thing.

They're doing this special on people's reaction

to Operation Desert Shield.

Dominick: He definitely had a reaction.

I was really excited to tell you.

- (WATER RUNNING) - (DOMINICK GROANS)

Come here, look at this.

What? - Look at that.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God, what is that?

Fucking guard kneed me in the testicles.

Hatch Forensic Hospital.

I can't believe how big they got. Fuckin' killing me.

- So what do you think? - What?

- What do you think? - About what?

About my balls?

No, about Connie Chung.

- What about her? - Well, I need to let her know

one way or the other, and I had to give her

my work number in case she couldn't get a hold of you.

- You gave her your work number? - Yeah.

Tell her no. No.

Seriously? - Seriously.

Okay, I mean...

it's your decision. I just think...

You just what? - I, I just...

I just think that you should talk to her

because she was really nice and I think you should just...

talk to her on the phone before you make your decision.

And Thad thought so, too.

Thad? What does he have to do with this?

Joy: He had nothing to do with it.

He was just here when she called

and he answered the phone

and then when I got off we were both just like,

"Oh, my God, we were just talking to Connie Chung from TV."

Whoa, big fat fuckin' whoop.

Connie Chung from TV. Oh!

I don't want that fuck... I don't want that asshole

picking up our phone, all right?

I have business on that line.

I don't want his voice representing my business.

Well, just talk to her, Dominick.

She's, she's really nice.

Yeah, I'm sure she's really, really nice

because she really, really wants something from you.

Listen, Joy, Connie Chung is not gonna be

your new best friend, all right?

I know she's not my new best friend.

I don't want it here. I'm dealing with a few

fuckin' things here, as you can see.

I don't want the fuckin' media circus

circling our house.

All right, she's manipulating you.

I'm not, I'm not stupid.

Whether you think I am or not.

Oh, give me a fuckin' break.

Do you know what I really, really wish?