Love Is For Suckers (Love That Will Freeze To Death / Eoleojugeul Yeonae Ttawi / 얼어죽을 연애따위)

[Names, businesses, products, events and places are used fictitiously.]

[A spectacular revival of "Kingdom of Love 2," which ended amid the controversy?]

["Kingdom of Love 2", will the marriage of the real couple be free from the stigma of manipulation?]

[Who's the couple to be wedded in "Kingdom of Love 2"?]

Hello.

- Hello. - Hello.

Hello.

Sunbae-nim, you're here?

It's been a while.

Have you been well?

- What were you filming? - This.

Not bad.

PD Goo Yeo Reum!

You're here?

Aigoo, PD Goo, hello!

- Hello. - Hello!

I really missed you!

- It's been so long. - I know, right?

She's prettier than the brides.

I really missed you.

Now, I'd like the final couple of "Kingdom of Love 2" to stand together.

We're going to proceed to film the couples.

Film the couples?

Oh, thank you.

["Kingdom of Love 2," filming of the final couples, complete.]

Okay, the filming of couples is over.

We'll take a short break.

Let me slide.

Buy some dakbal* on your way home.

This girl.

Yeah!

Order it with your finger.

Look at this guy.

Yeah, why?

Jae Hoon, dakbal.

And a bottle of soju while you're at it.

With the effort you took to call me, wouldn't it have been more efficient in many aspects to order it yourself?

No, no.

If I order it, the delivery fee won't be worth it.

Just buy me some on your way back.

Yeo Reum wants to eat dakbal!

Goo Yeo Reum, don't you feel sorry for your body?

Why should I feel sorry for my body?

You eat dakbal early evening,

let out bloody poop in the morning,

and your visceral fat increases.

John Jang ignored my text.

John Jang?

Oh, the young bastard you're flirting with these days?

I mean, he must be too sick or too busy—

Ma'am, you've been rejected.

Buy the one with bones.

And the soju with the red bottle cap.

Gosh, when will she grow up?

Now, shall we?

Aigoo.

Hey, it's me.

- Wrap a dakbal for me to go. - To go?

- You should eat it here. - PD Goo asked me to buy it for her.

Yes, flaming charisma. Fire!

Hey, Park Jae Hoon!

You were a bread shuttle for Goo Yeo Reum in high school and

now you're Goo Yeo Reum's dakbal shuttle at 37 freaking years old.

- I'm proud of you. - When was I ever her shuttle?

You're doing it right now.

I'm just showing my marginalized neighbor some warmth.

Oh, is that right?

It's nice to see two single middle-aged people relying on each other in harmony.

Rely— hey, what... what...

What rely—

Goo Yeo Reum, that girl is...

just b-baggage. Baggage, baggage.

So how spicy did your baggage want her dakbal, Shuttle?

Please make it so her butthole won't be intact, Mr. Park.

All right, Shuttle.

- You need help? - What help?

You want to be my shuttle, too?

Gosh, just buy me some dakbal!

Chef John!

What are you up to, PD Goo?

Can we meet for a sec, right now?

Right now?

Gosh...

I'm going, I'm going.

Sorry! I can't eat dakbal.

- John Jang just asked me to meet him. - John Jang?

- You said he was MIA. - I don't know!

He suddenly said he'll be outside my house.

Hey,

I think he's going to ask me to date him starting today.

Aigoo, that man has no intentions, and you're just acting a fool by yourself.

If it's not to ask me out,

why would he ask me to meet him at this hour, huh?

If he asks to borrow money, just make sure not to lend him any.

Should I just pounce on him first?

Goo Yeo Reum, you're really going to end up in jail that way.

He's never going to ask you out.

Why? Why wouldn't he? Why, why, why?

If he's not asking you out after three dates, it's a no deal.

But you've been flirting with him...

for over three months?

- Yeah! - See? It's game over.

I'll put my hand on the stove if he asks you out.

Hey, don't put your hand anywhere, and just bet money.

- 1,000,000 won. - You'll bet 1,000,000 won?

Yeo Reum, he won't budge even if you pounce on him. I'll bet 2,000,000 won on that.

You... that statement just now was highly offensive.

I mean...

I didn't mean to offend,

that was honest to God fact.

So it's 1 million won if we date, and 2 million won if we sleep together, right?

- Yes. - Go and take out some cash.

I just changed my style from effortless casual to super sexy.

You're dead.

When will she grow up?

Can she even pull off sexy?

Let's go.

Chef John.

What brings you...

to my house... at this late hour?

I have something to tell you.

Would you like to come inside?

Well, that's a bit improper.

Shall we go for a drive?

Watch your head.

All right.

It's an iced Americano, just what you like.

Thank you.

God, your perfume.

It smells so nice.

When I was in Paris,

I looked all over for it because I loved the scent.

This man and I met as a program director and cast member,

went on seven dates,

and took it as far as a light kiss.

I can't believe I dated someone I met through work...

I felt overwhelmed at first,

but the younger man's directness led me all this way.

Now it's time,

to clearly define our relationship.

PD Goo, everyone is like that these days.

They slyly end things after flirting with you for a while.

Gosh, but that's not my style.

I think...

being straightforward is the neatest.

I also...

like being straightforward.

I really enjoyed our dates until now.

I had a good time as well.

I think I'm compatible with you in various aspects.

We have similar hobbies, interests,

and food preferences.

Hey, punk!

Similar food preferences means similar sexual preferences, punk!

But...

we don't have chemistry.

What...

What don't we have?

Chemistry...

I'm not into you, so we...

Let's stay as good noona and dongsaeng* from now on.

Hello, I'm John Jang.

Okay, today's star of the show is the penis fish, penis fish.

Wow, just look at the size, the size!

We're going to take the prepared penis fish and add it to the ramen.

- - The penis fish

contains glycine and alanine

- Wow, every... - which makes it taste sweet.

single thing he does is unappealing.

Gosh.

Chef John.

You could've said that over the phone or by text,

but why did you go through the trouble of coming here and telling me face-to-face?

Manners.

You.

A face-to-face is better than "uncontact."

And moreover, Noona, you're six years older than I am,

so "Jang yu yoo suh."

Do you want to write a will?

I'm sorry?

Anyway,

I understand what you're trying to say.

Close noona and dongsaeng...

fine.

Let's do that.

As expected, Noona, you're really chill and charismatic!

Don't act awkward on the film set, just in case.

And let's just focus on our work from now on.

That sounds perfect to me.

If you're done, then let's go.

I'll take you home.

But...

Chef John.

Who is it?

Gosh...

200,000 won.

You slept with him?

That son of a b****...

Listen to me.

This is the last thing I said to John Jang,