The Sinking of the Laconia

* Einen bessern findst du nicht

* Die Trommel schlug zum Streite

* Er ging an meiner Seite

* In gleichem Schritt und Tritt

* In gleichem Schritt und Tritt

* Kann dir die Hand nicht geben

* Bleib du im ew'gen Leben

* Mein guter Kamerad

* Mein guter Kamerad

And in breach of a pact of non-aggression...

Whose birthday is it today? It's Mummy's birthday.

- (child) My birthday! - (man laughs)

Happy birthday.

Here. Well, go on, then.

One, two, three...

- Look at all the smoke! - (all chatter)

- You have missed the boat, madam. - No. I've just seen the boat.

- But you have missed it, madam. - That's ridiculous.

- Regulations. - Sir, please.

We were just shutting up shop, I'm afraid. In fact, we have shut up shop.

I only want some sugar and tea.

I hope you have your ration book and Co-op number, in triplicate. Come on.

- Boy or a girl? - Girl.

- Passport, madam. - It's in the suitcase somewhere.

Feel free to open it.

- Is she good? - I'm very Iucky.

She wakes up in the morning with a smile on her face and it stays there all day.

Despite everything.

Yes, despite everything.

I've got two girls at home. Bit older than...

- EIIa. - Lovely name.

Well, you are now free to board the Laconia. Bound for Liverpool.

- Mrs...? - Smith. Hilda Smith.

- And you are? - Thomas Mortimer.

Junior Third Officer Mortimer.

Not a bad day for it.

Penny for them, Captain?

Penny is too much.

What have we done to deserve this?

1 800 bloody Italians Iocked in the hold.

AII those Polish Iumberjacks Iooking after them.

They won't want bread and jam.

Not only that. We know the reason they're here.

Ballast. For the journey back.

I've said it before and I'II say it again.

This ship was created for the rich, the idle,

pink gins and sunsets over Sorrento.

And so was I.

Oh, well. I suppose it's better than a dinghy from Doha in the dead of night.

- Do you think they'II have staff? - Oh, Mother, it could be so much worse.

Those poor boys.

- Look. There's one. - One what?

A boxer. Tough bastards, the Poles.

Hey!

There's another one. I can always tell a boxer, you know.

Just by the way they walk,

hold themselves,... and hit people.

Hey. Hey, hey.

Here comes the cream.

You might consider your Iate father's views on foreigners, Sarah.

She'II Iook back, Billy. Bet she will.

Told you.

- How Iong have you known the Captain? - Trained together.

He was my best man, I was his.

My answer to your next question is yes.

He's a worrier, a botherer, always has been.

If he was religious, he'd never be off his knees.

- But is he Iucky? - Oh, no. Good God, no.

I take it you know what happened to our Iast ship?

Best say your prayers.

Meine Herren.

Restez la, jolie. Restez la.

Kein Moos ansetzen hier. Das geht mir viel zu langsam!

Jetzt mal, die Frischlinge, angetreten!

- (ship's horn) - Practice round!

- Load! - Load

- 1,500 yards! - (horn)

T arget!

Coutts. Captain Benjamin Coutts at your service.

Thomas Mortimer. Junior Third Officer.

- So what do you think? - Honestly?

I've seen worse-protected ships but mainly in books on military history.

Basically, your guns are rather similar to my father.

A relic of the Great War.

- Sir, it's... - Back on duty, Townes, now,

No, I've got a toothache, sir. It's my wisdom tooth.

- Unlikely, Townes, in your case. - I've got a dicky...

No, you haven't. You haven't. Back on the guns, now.

* Rock-a-bye baby, on the treetop

* When the wind blows, the cradle will rock

* When the bough breaks

* The cradle will fall

* Down will come baby, cradle and all

Dear God, the stories we tell our children.

I have to say, I've told mine those stories too.

And do you know what? They Iaughed.

We come in peace, bearing sweets. Just please don't ask me to hold her.

She's five months old.

I Iove children. Especially when Kodak are involved

and they come in black and white and four by three and sealed in an envelope.

- You have a beautiful voice. - (woman) She certainly has.

Laura Ferguson, by the way.

Hilda Smith.

We have a problem, sir. I think you need to come.

There the enemy go again, Mortimer.

Right, then, Hilda Smith, what shall we do?

Now, tell me, do you play cards at all? Gin rummy? Canasta?

Oh, poker?

Snap.

Snap?

Here.

- Can you help me? - I can't hear you.

Hi. I'm Vincenzo Di Giovanni.

As you can tell, it is the great fear of the men that we are here,

held captive, beneath the waterline, by these brutal bastards.

Many of our own men work beneath the waterline too.

No one here can really be called safe.

Ah, well done, Mortimer. Peace in our time, eh?

PIease, we vomit and wash in buckets of sea water.

We have Iess privacy than a pig in a pen.

I'm sure something can be arranged.

Soap, water. Fresh air, too, on a short but daily basis, alright?

- Thank you. - I'II report your complaints.

Hey, do you know Billy Hardacre, the boxer, Lieutenant?

Yes, I do. Everybody on board knows Billy Hardacre.

He was my hero. I saw him fight, and I'm a boxer too.

- (laughs) - (Mortimer) Oh, really?

- (men laugh) - Well, I'II send Hardacre down.

And you can talk about boxing brutality, that stuff, if it makes you happy.

What are they complaining about?

Nothing much.

Their food is shit, the Poles are bastards

and the pens are disgusting, dangerous and overcrowded.

- (Steel) Fair enough. - You fight?

I box.

I fight.

Ja.

I wouldn't!

I just fuckin' wouldn't!

- (all cheer) - (trumpet)

The only question is, do you trust me?

That's the only question you have to ask.

- I trusted you straight away. - So?

Most men I know would prefer dancing or drinking.

I often do. You should see my slow waltz after several gin and tonics.

Look, I'm off duty and it's as simple as that.

I have four hours to do exactly as I want to do within reason

and this is what I want to do.

It reminds me.

She reminds me.

I think you could be the kind of man that needs no reminding.

The moment she cries. Promise me?

- And thank you. - Right.

I have three children at home, Mortimer,

if you ever fancy a holiday in the Scottish Highlands.

You alright?

The concept of Iove at first sight, no. No, that will not happen to me.

Oh, snap.

The very idea that I'd walk into a room and there he'd be.

Snap again.

Oh, but it was. It was as if...

As if you'd known him all your Iife.

Snap.

That's exactly how I feel about EIIa's father.

- Oh, he must be wonderful. - He was.

He was a wonderful man. Brave to the point of foolishness.

I'm so sorry, Hilda.

I thought... I was hoping...

- (coughs) - (Laura) What's happened to him?

- Seasick, madam. - Seasick my Highland arse!

- This young man has been beaten. - (Billy) Not by me he hasn't.

I don't care if he's the bastard son of Mussolini!

We do not behave in such a manner. We Ieave that to the Germans!

Now, wait. Before you carry on kickin' off on me,