The Time of Their Lives

Hurry up, we are leaving soon.

Helen.

Off to a premiere, are we?

Come on, we haven't got all day.

Suit yourself.

This might be worth something one day.

Aren't they pretty?

It's George's birthday.

He would have been 40 today.

Take them away.

Anyway, you shouldn't pick wildflowers.

Spoils it for everyone else.

Happy birthday, sweetheart.

- Come along. - Careful on the coach now, please.

Be careful, watch your step, all right?

Oh.

Directly this way.

And where do you think you are going?

Get back here! Hey!

Hello. Can I drive?

BY THE 100th TIME, NO, REG.

Just get on, and sit down like everyone else.

- Well, what about on the way... - reg...

What are these?

Biscuits? I thought we'd try something different.

Well, put them back. I don't want them, they're far too expensive.

I said put them back.

Apparently, we don't want these.

Don't you worry. Some people don't know what they're missing.

Would you like a bag?

Hurry up, you are keeping everyone waiting.

Oh, excuse me. Hello. Oh.

You dropped your purse.

There's nothing in it.

Do you need a hand?

Oh. I thought you'd never ask. Here. There.

Put it out.

We will have to have at least one toilet stop.

- Uh. - Probably two.

And please drive safely, yes?

What?

Shut the door. Let's start.

- Can I drive? - No, reg.

Thanks.

- Oh. - What the...

excuse me? Excuse me? Can you stop the bus, please?

- What? - What about on the way back?

This is a mistake. I need to get off.

So do I!

Sit down! Sit down.

Why on earth did you get on?

I was helping you.

Oh, see where that got you.

Where are we going?

A day at the seaside.

But I can't.

Well, you are now.

I'm gonna drown myself when I get there.

- I need the loo. - So do I.

Don't argue, don't eat any sweets.

- Out, out, out, out. Thank you. - Your mother's disappeared.

- Where is she? - She went up on a coach.

- Why? - How should I know?

I've got to get to work.

And what am I supposed to do with these two?

Think of something. She'll be back soon. I've got to go.

Ugh!

- Hello? - Polly?

I'm in a service station. Will you get me grandad?

He's very cross. When are you coming back?

Soon, soon. Hold on. I've got to go now. Oh, god, oh.

You idiot! Where are you?

There's ham in the fridge, frank.

Stop! Stop! It's me!

Stop! It's me!

Come on!

Oh.

Hurry up!

- What are you doing? - I'm sorry.

I got on your coach earlier by mistake,

and I was wondering if I could stay with you today

and then come back with you, if that's all right.

Yes, of course it's all right.

- Thank you, thank you. - Come on.

Let's go!

- Can I drive? - No, reg.

I can see the sea.

I told you it'd be worth it.

I haven't been to the seaside for years.

Why not?

Oh, you know, long way.

Your husband doesn't like to travel?

Not anymore. He's dead.

Really?

Yes.

I'm sorry to see him go.

Helen. The only sane one on the bus, apart from you, hopefully.

Priscilla. Nice to meet you.

Smile, everybody. You're on holiday.

Uh, it's beautiful.

The weather is good, no?

There's something awfully familiar about you. Have we met before?

I doubt it.

Come on, keep up.

I need a drink. Come on, let's go.

Oh. No, no, no. Not in the sea. Uh!

Oh.

- I'm afraid I'm a little short. - Oh.

Of course.

There we are.

I don't normally drink in the day.

This isn't normally.

- To us. - To us.

I'll give ya five seconds to get out of my sight

otherwise I'm gonna put a bullet where the sun don't shine.

What?

I've got Morty just where I want him

and I am not about to let him off the hook.

What do you mean?

Yes.

Oh, my god.

You're Helen Shelley.

Guilty.

I'm so excited, I... I... I've never met a real film star before.

I thought you were wonderful.

I'm your biggest fan.

Oh, well, that's wonderful,

because I really need you to help me, Priscilla.

My help?

Yes. Take a look at this.

"Jerry standing, celebrated British film director

died peacefully on the fifth of July." Oh.

"- At home in France. - Funeral, tenth of July at

...ile de ré, France.

Aww. He was such a great friend,

and a wonderful, wonderful director.

And I really need to say goodbye to him properly.

Of course you do.

Yes.

Well, I can't go on my own, can I?

No? Why not?

Well, I'd never make it.

I need you to help me.

- I can't go to France. - Why not?

- You've come this far. - Yeah, but that was by mistake.

That's how the best things happen.

Listen, can you keep a secret?

I am not that famous anymore.

You thought I was dead, didn't you?

No.

Uh, listen, Priscilla. I'm broke.

I have nothing,

and actresses cannot get old in Hollywood.

You see, this funeral is my last chance.

Everybody in Hollywood is going to be there,

heads of studios, agents, producers, directors.

It'll be... it'll be like the academy awards.

- Mm-hmm. - A little sadder, but not much.

I'm going to re-invent myself.

Out of the ashes. I am not going to go back to that home.

I would rather sleep rough.

You and I, we could have an adventure.

I know, but, I can't.

Of course you can't.

If you could wait another few days while I organize myself,

then maybe I could come then.

Yeah, too late. Be in the ground in three days.

It's just such short notice.

Yeah, well, unlike you, I have not yet given up.

Oh well, go back to your husband then.

Oh, I forgot, he's dead.

Have a nice life, what's left of it.

Helen.

Um, excuse me. I wonder could I borrow a phone?

I seem to have lost my purse with all my money in it.

Thanks.

- Press zero first. - Yeah.

- Hello? - Frank, you'll never guess who I just met.

- Where the hell are you? - Helen Shelley.

She wanted me to go to a funeral in France.

- France? - - All of Hollywood will be there.

Frank, would you have minded if I'd have gone?

Are you becoming senile?

- No. - Then come home.

Yes, of course. I'll be home soon.

Sorry.

Get on and sit down.

Stop the bus!

Come on, help me get her.

- Helen, where are you going? - You're hurting me!

- Get on the bus! Helen! - Get off me!

I am not going back in there! You cannot make me!

This is kidnapping! Ah!

- Get on and shut up! - Ah! Get off me!

She doesn't want to come back.

- Reg! - You're hurting me!

Get back to your seat, reg! Get back to your seat!

Leave her alone.

Come on, you're okay.

Stop that.