Seitentriebe

- - Robert?

You're home already?

Leave it.

It's hot today.

The hotel didn't have air conditioning.

Who's that?

Me?

Elena.

That's my bed.

My flat, my boyfriend. Although...

"Boyfriend"?

He never wanted to be tied down. Now I know what he meant.

I don't know how much he's told you about me,

but I work in security and social welfare,

and was on training.

Violence prevention.

When a group becomes aggressive,

you need to approach the individuals.

Some of us had done the last part,

which is why we left earlier.

I wanted to come home and celebrate my birthday.

Today.

37.

Oh, is that for me?

Wow. Lovely!

You wanted one...

You put the books in, too.

Can we go down and talk?

Hey, Robert, I think it's good you have a suggestion.

Sure. This is none of my business.

We're not a real couple.

No, no, no! Stay.

I'd like to get you know you better.

Look.

My colleagues gave me fireworks as a present.

I'll shove these up your ass, and watch you light up.

- -

I'm stupid.

Yes, you can say it.

I'm the most stupid woman in the universe.

He always said so: "No strings. Let's see where it leads."

I sat around hoping. For five years now.

Or six? I don't even know how long we've been together.

Because only I am with him, and he with me when he feels like it.

But I thought I'd manage. "He'll fall in love with me."

As if a man were a building site waiting to be finished.

Fuck!

But it's over now.

Done. Finished. Never again Robert.

Or I'll cut off my little finger and bring it here. Deal?

Hey, what do you think?

Dinosaur Museum with the boys tonight?

They have some new bones. Reptiles.

I could finish work earlier.

Timo's not coming home this weekend.

Again? Does he have a girlfriend?

I don't know.

Then the three of us will go.

We can eat there.

We can eat here too.

But there...

you won't need to cook...

and will be spoiled.

Monika... it's been over a year since we went out.

You'll be late to work.

Don't you think it's about time to be among people?

I'm not in the mood for bones.

What are you doing?

I need a pan for school for music class.

Did you have your milk?

-Mm-hmm. -

Ciao.

Okay... dinosaur bones aren't original,

but it's a place you know and feel comfortable in.

We could go to a hotel on the weekend.

Or take a holiday. We haven't done that in ages.

Why do we have to do something?

So you get out of the house for once.

What is there outside?

The neighbors look at me like I'm a monster.

They should look at themselves. They have problems.

And I told you, we can move if it helps.

Or we invite friends over, like we used to.

I haven't seen Nele for over a year.

We've sat on this sofa for a year.

-You always say "no". -That's not true.

It is. Never mind what I want.

To go on holiday, go out, or go for a walk.

You always say no.

And it's the same in bed.

I know you need time, and I want to give it to you.

But don't you think we can take a few steps by now?

A few steps?

Just say what you mean.

We talked about your problems...

Your trouble having an orgasm.

But if we don't try again, nothing will change.

Then tell me what you want.

What do you want?

Nele, where are you?

I'm at the courthouse.

I'm running late, sorry.

We've had the appointment for weeks. Take a cab.

No, I'm at a flat viewing,

and this is the one!

Go in and do it on your own.

I can't get a divorce on my own.

Sorry, I know...

But I can't make it! I'm so sorry!

I'll try to move the date.

-Thank you. -You owe me.

If I get the flat I'll make an altar

with your photo on it.

That was the second time.

Maybe she does it on purpose.

"I'm still married to someone who pesters me,

so I have to leave" sounds more serious than

"we used to be married,

but are now flatmates,

with separate bedrooms, accounts, and plans."

Everyone asks,

"Why does she want her own flat?"

Yes, why does she want her own flat?

We have a good thing going.

-Oh! I thought you were open. -I slept late.

I wanted to hang up this flat search ad.

There's something on the horizon,

but just to be sure.

I sold your bookshelf on Saturday.

The 1000-franc one?

A guy gave it to his boo as a birthday present.

-What sort of flat do you want? -A single one. I'm divorcing.

Heavy.

But I don't get why people marry and need a relationship.

How long did it last?

Sorry. I'm just curious.

But I'm a blabbermouth.

I met him yesterday.

I didn't know you lived here.

I sleep here because of burglars.

-You don't have an alarm system? -I am the alarm system.

-It's too expensive. -Sell any more of my stuff?

Slow down.

We just started displaying your things recently.

The commission for your shelf

will go towards my new stage outfit.

Express job from the army.

The blankets gave three recruits trouble breathing.

Does everyone think I can do it all on my own?

You bring in work continuously, the wife misses the court date.

Payback. You missed it last time.

I had to work on my free day

because of you and your damn express jobs.

What is this?

It's for close combat.

Come by for dinner. You and Nele.

Like in the old days. I'm cooking.

You can't cook, and Nele and I aren't together.

You eat, live, and go to therapy together, but aren't together.

I go to therapy on my own, she's getting a flat.

Why? New boyfriend?

Why not ask her yourself?

It would do Monika good.

She doesn't go out because she thinks

everyone's laughing at her.

-So tell her no one's laughing. -But they are.

She ran amok with an assault rifle

and went to a psychiatric ward.

But that doesn't mean she should be locked in.

Twenty bottles of the night cream.

No, twenty, not two. And the serum too.

And can you make your website quicker?

It freezes, and I don't like ordering on the phone.

Do you still have the Ylang-Ylang oil?

I don't know what it is. It says so on the package.

Yeah... There are a few Asian places around.

I can show you.

Get off your bike!

Fuck you, you pig whore!

We're not pigs, and biking's not permitted here.

You stay so cool. I can learn from you.

I do my job.

Hey. I'm here because of the shelf.

-Come upstairs. -Don't touch me.

Hey, hey, hey. Easy now.

-I just want to talk. -I said no.

She said no.

I have ears. She's my girlfriend.

No, she isn't.

Two minutes.

Why did you never tell me you're into big jugs?

I'm not.

She had melons this big.

Is that it? Are mine too small?

-No... -I'm not blonde enough?

Too old? What's wrong with me?

-You're perfect. -Why did you do it?