Surf Ninjas

Zatch: BY THE TIME I HAD FOUND THEM,

I KNEW THE OTHERS WERE CLOSE BEHIND,

AND SOON, THE BOYS' DESTINIES WOULD BE CHANGED FOREVER.

HEY, GUYS, HOW MANY TIME I GOT TO TELL YOU?

NO VAN HALEN TILL I'VE HAD MY COFFEE.

WE'VE ALREADY HAD OURS.

GUYS, HOMEWORK?

YEAH.

HEY. HEY.

DAD, I THINK WE'RE FALLING INTO A RUT HERE.

EVERY DAY IT'S BREAKFAST,

"DID YOU DO YOUR HOMEWORK," FIGHT.

THAT'S RIGHT, DAD-- BREAKFAST, HOMEWORK, FIGHT.

I MEAN...

CAN'T WE JUST SAY WE LOVE EACH OTHER

AND HAVE A MOMENT?

YOU'RE SMOOTH, JOHNNY,

BUT YOU'RE NOT ALWAYS GOING TO GET OUT OF LIFE'S PROBLEMS

WITH THIS SMOOTH STUFF.

I LOVE YOU, DAD.

I LOVE YOU, TOO.

PSYCH.

GUYS, WHEN I GET UP EVERY MORNING

AND GO TO THE HAMBURGER STAND,

DO YOU KNOW WHAT KEEPS ME GOING?

I LOVE YOU, TOO.

I LOVE YOU-- AW.

HEY, GUYS, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?

ARE YOU GOING TO DRIVE ME CRAZY?

IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO DO?

DO YOU WANT TO DRIVE ME CRAZY?

NO, DAD.

WE JUST WANT TO DRIVE,

BUT THE MAN WON'T LET US.

HOW CAN I MAKE YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND?

YOU CANNOT LIVE YOUR LIFE SURFING.

YOU NEED SOMETHING TO FALL BACK ON.

WE'RE WAY AHEAD OF YOU, DAD.

THAT'S WHY WE SKATEBOARD.

WHAT WAS THAT?

PROBABLY THAT DUMB CAT KNOCKING SOMETHING OVER.

WE HAVE A CAT?

I'D PUT DOWN THAT KNIFE IF I WERE YOU.

SERIOUSLY, IF YOU DON'T WANT CHIVES,

I WON'T PUT THEM IN.

WELL, I WANT CHIVES, BRO.

YOU GOT IT.

IGGY, YOU'RE HERE EVERY MORNING.

YOU'RE HERE EVERY NIGHT.

DON'T YOUR PARENTS EVER ASK WHERE YOU BEEN?

MR. McQUINN, MY PARENTS ARE SEALED

IN THE BIOSPHERE IN ARIZONA. PIMENTO?

IT'S LIKE A LITTLE TOMATO.

YOU KNOW, THE BIOSPHERE.

IT'S LIKE A BUBBLE THING IN THE DESERT.

A LOT OF PLANTS AND ANIMALS.

NOBODY'S ALLOWED IN OR OUT.

LOOK, IT'D BE IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO EXPLAIN IT

TO A LAYMAN LIKE YOURSELF.

IGGY, YOU NEED A PROFESSIONAL LISTENER.

WELL, HE GOES TO THE SCHOOL SHRINK EVERY DAY.

IT'S NOT HELPING.

BEETS?

IGGY, DON'T YOUR PARENTS EVER FEED YOU? HUH?

AND DON'T THEY EVER PROVIDE YOU WITH CLOTHING

EXCEPT FOR MY BOXER SHORTS?

THESE ARE YOURS?

YES!

ALL RIGHT, DAD! SEE YOU LATER.

BIOSPHERE. GOOD ONE.

I FEEL ONE COMING.

UH-OH, HE FEELS ONE COMING.

OH, IT'S A GOOD ONE. IT'S A KILLER.

ANCHOVY OMELET.

Zatch: THEY CAME TO KILL THE BOYS,

AS I KNEW THEY WOULD,

BUT I WAS THERE TO STOP THEM.

YOU GUYS ARE VILE.

FROM NOW ON, I WALK.

THEIR PAST HAD FINALLY CAUGHT UP WITH THEM.

NOW THE TIME HAD COME

TO PREPARE THEM FOR THEIR FUTURE.

MOTO-SURF!

MOTO-SURF!

MOTO-SURF!

360!

HEAD DIP! HEAD DIP!

OH, NO. WIPE OUT.

HAWAII FIVE-O OPENING.

COPS! COPS! GET DOWN! GET DOWN!

ADAM, GET DOWN.

OOH, THEY BUSTED JONES AGAIN.

WE WEREN'T MOTO-SURFING.

YEAH. RIGHT.

YOU KNOW, JUST ONCE

I'D LIKE TO BE WRONG.

HURRY UP.

I'M OPEN! COME ON!

SHOOT IT!

COME ON.

COME ON.

OVER--YEAH!

OH.

I NEED A HOMEWORK ALIBI.

MAYBE I CAN TELL THEM

THAT I WAS HAMMERED BY THE FACT

I FOUND OUT I WAS ADOPTED LAST NIGHT.

YOU WERE ADOPTED LAST NIGHT?

WHY DIDN'T YOUR DAD JUST ADOPT YOU

WHEN YOU WERE A BABY?

IGGY, WE WERE ADOPTED WHEN WE WERE BABIES.

WHAT IF I WAS ADOPTED,

AND MY DAD WAS A REALLY RICH KING AND STUFF?

OH, YEAH. KINGS ARE ALWAYS

GIVING UP THEIR KIDS UP FOR ADOPTION.

HEY, IF MY DAD WAS KING,

MAN, I WOULDN'T HAVE TO WORRY

ABOUT MY HOMEWORK ANYMORE.

I'D DEFINITELY BE OUT OF THE 11th GRADE.

AND IF LISA CAINE WOULDN'T GO OUT WITH ME,

IN THE DUNGEON, JUST LIKE THAT.

OH, I'D LOVE THAT.

THAT WOULD BE THE GREATEST.

WHAT'S THIS ALL ABOUT?

I'M UP EL CREEK-O DE MERDE.

I WAS SUPPOSED TO DO THIS FULL UNWELCOMING SPEECH

FOR THIS VISITING GURU GUY, BABA RAM,

IN ASSEMBLY SECOND PERIOD.

RELAX.

LOOK, IF YOU WANT TO GET OUT OF IT,

TELL THEM I JUST FOUND OUT YOU WERE ADOPTED.

GOOD.

LET ME PUT THIS IN YOUR LANGUAGE, DUDE.

THIS MAY BE A PRETTY GROOVY SCENE FOR YOU,

BUT I TAKE IT PRETTY SERIOUSLY.

ARE YOU PREPARED?

I TOLD YOU, MR. DUNBAR.

EVERYTHING'S UNDER CONTROL.

NO WORRIES, BRA'.

GOOD...

BRA'.

"BRA'."

I'VE GOT NOTHING.

I'VE GOT...

OH!

'CAUSE I'M A PROFESSIONAL.

HOW YOU DOING?

HEY.

HI, GUYS.

IT'S OUR PRIVILEGE TO WELCOME

ONE OF THE WORLD'S GREAT SPIRITUAL LEADERS,

THE BABA RAM OF MEE GROB.

AN ASIAN-AMERICAN STUDENT

HAS BEEN PERSUADED TO VOLUNTEER...

WHOO!

AND PREPARE A WELCOMING PRESENTATION,

WHICH, I'VE BEEN ASSURED,

IS IN THE TRADITIONAL ETHNIC STYLE.

YOU'LL LOVE THIS KID.

YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS

FROM YOUR HOMEWORK LAST NIGHT, ADAM.

OH, THE HOMEWORK SPAIN.

MANY...PEOPLE... THINK...SPAIN

IS...

HERE.

HA HA HA! HA HA HA!

ON THE OTHER HAND,

THERE'S A SCHOOL OF THOUGHT THAT CLAIMS SPAIN...

IS...HERE.

HA HA HA!

HA HA HA!

THOSE PEOPLE, TOO, ARE WRONG.

SO WHERE IS SPAIN?

COULD BE...HERE?

COULD BE...

HERE.

HERE?

HA HA HA!

HERE.

HERE?

HERE.

Zatch: WHO WOULD WANT TO HURT THESE BOYS?

ONLY I KNEW

THE ANSWER WAS ON AN ISLAND 13,000 MILES AWAY

IN THE HEART OF AN EVIL SOUL.

HELLO.

COLONEL CHI IS GOOD.

COLONEL CHI IS WISE.

COLONEL CHI IS ALMIGHTY.

COLONEL CHI WILL TAKE CARE OF US.

COLONEL CHI IS STRONG.

COLONEL CHI WILL LEAD US FOREVER.

COLONEL CHI IS GOOD.

COLONEL CHI IS WISE.

COLONEL CHI IS ALMIGHTY.

COLONEL CHI WILL TAKE CARE OF US.

COLONEL CHI IS STRONG.

COLONEL CHI WILL LEAD US FOREVER.

Machine: HI. THIS IS COLONEL CHI.

I'M NOT IN RIGHT NOW,