Moontrap: Target Earth

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Mya!

Holy crap.

Who is she?

What is the history behind this magnificent sculpture

recently unearthed on the plains of Arizona

in the arid lands of the navajo nation?

How old is she?

She, it, does not conform to any

known remnants of navajo history.

And the tools needed to construct her

suggest a civilization previously unknown.

One that may have existed before the dawn of known history.

And with your generous commitment,

we will hopefully unlock this beautiful enigma

and find out what secrets she has hidden.

Are there any questions?

The young lady in the corner.

Miss Sharon Christine Turner, I believe.

Scout.

Scout.

- Any plans for tonight, professor Allen?

I'm so glad you asked that.

I'm glad you're glad.

- Because I have very important plans.

I'm very intrigued.

- As you should be, because they are surprisingly devised

very cleverly with you as the focal point.

I am surprised and intrigued.

Please elaborate.

- They are to wine, dine and just perhaps seduce.

- My most trusted colleague, miss Sharon Christine Turner.

Scout.

Scout.

I like, I like.

Really?

Which part?

The dine part.

This girl is starving.

Yeah?

So, what do you think?

Sushi.

- No, about our little show and tell.

You think it'll get them excited?

Make 'em cough green?

Yeah.

No problem.

How could they refuse some one so irrestibly lickable?

I am truly irresistible.

- But you've got to change that part

about hopefully discovering the truth.

How so?

To we will discover the truth.

Be positive, young man.

Ah, no can do, my gal.

You know us serious academic types.

Like you?

Like me.

Can't make those kinds of promises.

- Then what kind can you promise me,

professor Daniel Allen?

Oh, serious time now?

Maybe.

Ah, okay.

- I, Daniel Allen, promise to scout that I will forever--

be saved by the bell.

Only reprieved.

Hey, Bryan.

Danny.

- You calling me from your big deal secret location?

That I am, my man.

And is this the call,

the holy shit one you promised me?

Ah, no, amigo, no.

This is the call saying that holy shit's

not happening tonight.

- You know, I'm starting to think that just maybe

you don't have that world changing discovery

that's going to finally put you on top.

No, no, it's for real.

Okay, no stop to the top.

Don't you doubt that.

Oh, I won't.

Cool.

- Trust me, it's way bigger than your mystery woman statue.

So you say

so I say.

But, um, there's been a delay, all right?

It's outta my hands.

Sorry.

Okay?

- Yeah, but I'm still starting to doubt you.

It'll be worth the wait, pal.

I promise you.

Oh, boy, oh, boy.

- Yeah, ah, you might want to be watching CNN tonight.

Really?

Really.

Okay.

Might.

Take care, Bryan.

Carter.

Calling from who-knows-where.

Ooh, about who-knows-what?

Yep.

Still trying to outshine you?

Yeah, maybe.

But now, we can directly proceed

to the wine, dine, and seduce.

Oh, boy, oh, boy.

- It's the greatest discovery since,

ah, man went to the moon.

Shit, shit, that sucks.

Asshole.

Okay, all right, something better, something better.

Don't be a fool, be cool.

Hi.

- And a big hi right back at you, Mr. Carter.

- Uh, sorry, I was expecting someone else.

I know.

The alphabet boys.

Abc, nbc, CNN.

Oh, yeah, kinda.

- Oh, please don't be embarrassed.

I completely understand.

But before you get your 15 minutes, I would, we,

were sent to make sure that your incredible, uh--

discovery.

- Discovery, thank you, is what you say it is.

No offense, I hope.

- No, no, not at all, none taken, none taken.

I'd probably do the same if somebody told me

they had a, but it's for real.

Oh, I certainly hope so.

No doubt whatsoever.

As crazy and as whacked out as it sounds,

I mean, this is the genuine article, Mr.?

Kontral.

But Richard, please.

And this is Nicole, my facilitator.

Hi.

Hi.

- All right, Richard, right this way.

Right this way to the greatest discovery

since microwave popcorn.

Shit.

That is wonderful.

Alphabet time now, Richard?

So we had to, we had to cut away about 2,000 tons of ore,

when they, I, I found it.

See, I at first thought it was just a new strata,

but when I got closer and saw what those taco boys

were digging up, I made them clear out fast.

Good for you, Bryan.

- Yeah, yeah, there's no way I want them

chattering away about this.

Nor would I.

Look at it.

Doesn't it look brand new?

Like it could have been made yesterday.

It does indeed.

There's not a scratch on it.

It's gotta be over 14,000 years old.

Really?

14,000.

How on earth would you know that?

- Well, age of the ore around it.

That's when the geog, um, geologists

think it collapsed on it.

And look, these hieroglyphics.

That's not any language I've ever seen.

That is incredible.

You think that's incredible?

Wait 'til you hear the most incredible part.

You know what i think we got here?

- The suspense is killing me, Bryan.

- This isn't some old Indian piece of junk.

No.

What we've got here is an alien spaceship.

An ancient alien spaceship.

I'm talking chariots of the fucking gods here, Richard!

And you know something, i think it's still working.

Feel it.

Feel the power inside?

The sucker's alive.

Perhaps.

It is, it is

and not just from this whatever.

The whole area is vibrating.

Really?

You know, I believe you're correct.

Damn right.

Damn right you are.

Nicole.

- If it is, if it is, do you know what this means?

Do you have any idea what this means?

I know what this means.

What a goofball.

Don't you ever make light

of taking a human life again, Nicole.