The Elephant King

I want to make violent love

To you by the moon above

I want to make violent love to you

Go, go, go, Jake!

I want to kiss every night

To squeeze and hold you tight

I want to make violent love to you

I don't want to be frantic

I don't want to cramp your style

You're driving me into a panic

Stop.

You almost drive me wild

I want to make whoopee, too

And have a little fun with you

Hey.

I'm going in.

Okay.

Bye.

I don't want to be frantic

I don't want to cramp your style

You're driving me into a panic

You almost drive me wild

I want to make whoopee, too

And have a little fun with you

Happy birthday.

Asshole.

Hacienda Grill. How can I help you?

I'd like to speak to Oliver.

No, I'm sorry. He's too busy right now.

You're gonna have to call back later.

Uh, it's a family emergency.

Well, hold on, please.

Oliver! You got a family emergency on the phone.

Hello?

Hey, Ollie, it's Jake.

Jake.

A-Are you okay? They said it was an emergency.

No, I just wanted to talk to you, man.

Happy birthday.

Sorry.

I tried to call you.

Uh, I was out.

So, what have you been up to?

Uh, nothing.

Uh, just work.

Hey, can you hear the karaoke bar?

Yeah, every night, man, every night.

You still writing the story

about the anthropologist in Thailand?

Yeah, yeah.

Trying.

Look, I should probably get off the phone.

- I'm at work. - No, I wanted to talk.

You know, I really miss you, Ollie.

You should come out to Thailand.

The women here are so beautiful.

Hold on, hold on.

Hey.

Say hello to my little brother. Here.

Hello, my little brother.

No. Be sexy.

Hello, my little brother.

I can make you happy.

I have to go.

I really miss you, man.

Yeah, okay.

Look, call me later.

I'm sorry.

The anthropologist went to Thailand

on a generous research grant...

...to study a remote hill tribe near the Burmese border.

As it turned out...

...the hill tribe was his own invention.

But the anthropologist found other subjects to research.

When money ran short, he threw rigged boxing matches

against a lady-boy kickboxer who was in love with him.

On weekends, he traveled outside of Chiang Mai...

...delivering food and clothes to impoverished villagers.

I'm gonna make you happy.

Oliver. Oliver?

It's so dark in here.

- What you writing? - Nothing.

Did you take a shower today?

- Yes. - Doesn't smell like it.

Well, I did.

Do you remember Linda Bailey?

I told you about her. She teaches second grade.

- No. - No?

Well, I invited her over for dinner tonight.

I told her all about you, and she said she'd like to meet you.

What for?

Well, she's a writer, too, and I thought you might like her.

I'm not a writer. I'm a busboy.

Well, she's a writer,

and I thought you might like her.

Would you leave me alone, please?

We're having dinner in a half an hour,

and I would like you to get dressed up, all right?

- Okay. - Thank you.

You're welcome.

- And take another shower. - Yeah.

Coming.

All right, girls, back up. Back up, girls.

- Hi. Come on in. - Hi.

- Oh, cute dogs. - Thank you.

This is for you.

Oh, isn't that sweet?

- Well, that's delicious. - Yeah.

It's really good Merlot.

How's the food coming?

Don't rush the chef!

- You remember Bill. - Yes.

Well...

Hope you're hungry.

Very hungry.

Good.

My mom's trying to find me a mate.

Do you think that's appropriate?

Oh.

Would you like to be my mate?

I'm not trying to pick out a mate, Oliver.

Do you think you're the right one?

I guess we just met, so... I don't...

Oliver.

Hello.

Hey, Dad, it's Jake.

Jake!

I made your lamb tagine tonight.

Is that Jake?

I want to talk to him.

Hold on. Here.

How the hell are you doing, sonny boy, huh?

We got a letter here from the university.

They're pressing charges.

They say your grant application was fraudulent.

They're such idiots.

Well, your mother's a little worried about you.

Well, she wants me to come home and face the music.

Well, I hope you're living it up and having a good time.

Yeah, I'm doing my best.

How's that Thai stick?

Very good.

And the ladies?

Oh, Christ.

What I wouldn't give to be your age again.

Listen to me, Jake.

You've got to come home.

I'm willing to pay for the plane ticket.

You're in a lot of trouble.

They say they're gonna try you in absentia.

Diana, hang up the phone and let me talk to him.

No. I want to talk, too.

Jake, did you hear me?

Stop lecturing him.

Your brother's been very depressed.

He blames you, Jake.

And you don't seem to care about anybody in this family.

Do you want any of that? No?

From collection agencies looking for you.

Because we cosigned your loan!

Ee! Ee!

Oliver. Oliver!

Pick up the phone!

Hey, Jake.

How's it going?

Fine. Hey, can you guys get off the phone, please?

Okay. But, Jake, we need to talk.

Yeah, we will.

Guess they told you I tried to kill myself.

They told me you were in the hospital.

Well, it's bullshit, just so you know.

What happened?

Uh, you know I can't ever sleep.

So I went to the drugstore.

You know, I got some sleeping pills, took those.

How many did you take?

Not that many.

But I still couldn't sleep, so I took a few more and...

Well, Mom came in, of course.

Saw the bottle on the floor and lost it.

So I got to spend two weeks in a fucking mental institution.

Oh, shit.

Ollie, my time's about to run out.

Hey! When... When are you coming home?

Are you kidding me?

I want you to come to Thailand.

I might be able to get you a ticket.

Mom told me that...

Jake?

Ollie?

Ollie.

Jake?

Linda?

Lek?

Lek?

Um, I would like to buy a ticket for my brother

to fly from New York to Chiang Mai.

- Which day, sir? - As soon as possible.

I will check for you first.

What are you gonna say to him?