Roofman

傑德 我需要你開始打掃衛生間 Jade, I need you to start on the bathrooms.

喬斯琳 請把所有的雞蛋、麪糊、 Joslyn, can you please take out all the eggs, batter,

肉餅和麥滿分從冰櫃裏拿出來 好嗎？ patties and McMuffins out of the freezer, okay?

等我啓動所有設備後就來幫你 I'll help you once I turn everything on.

早上好 各位 Good morning, team.

不 不 不要 No, no, no.

別害怕 Don't be scared.

照我說的做 就不會有人受傷 明白嗎？ You just do what I say, no one gets hurt, okay?

不 不 你看 No, no, look.

槍口朝下 Pointing it down.

好的 現在我要說一句禮貌 Okay, now, I'm gonna say a polite

又愉快的"早上好" 然後你們要跟着說一遍 and cheerful "Good morning," and then you guys say it back.

早上好 Good morning.

不...杜安 要等我說完之後 No... Duane, after I say it.

流程是這樣的 明白嗎？ That's how that works. Okay?

現在 早上好 各位 Now, good morning, team.

早上好 Good morning.

是的 完美 Yes. Perfect.

我說做什麼 你們就照做 明白嗎 I say what to do and you guys just do it. Okay.

我要你們把外套重新穿上 I want you to get your coats back on.

杜安 拿上你的外套 Duane, grab your coat.

嗯？拿上你的外套 Huh? Grab your coat.

我沒有外套 先生 I don't have one, sir.

你沒有外套？你怎麼會沒有外套？ You don't have a coat? How do you not have a coat?

我剛剛忘了 I just forgot.

好吧 你今天只能稍微受點凍了 Well, you're just gonna have to be a little cold today.

好吧 我們走 All right, let's go.

您先請 女士優先 After you. Ladies first.

現在 聽我說 Now, listen to me.

你們不會死在這裏的 You guys aren't gonna die in here.

我一出去就報警 Soon as I'm out of here, I'm gonna call the cops

他們會放你們出來的 and they're gonna let you guys out.

說不定還能放一天假 Probably get the day off.

不 別 別這樣 No, don't, don't.

別那樣看着我 Do not look at me like that.

杜安 住手 Duane, stop it.

因爲這都是你的錯 'Cause this is your fault.

好冷 It's cold.

你是認真的嗎？ Are you serious?

該死 Dang it.

真不知道是哪個白癡 I don't know what kind of jerk

上班連自己的外套都不帶 doesn't bring his own coat to work.

滿意了嗎？開心了嗎？ Okay? Happy now?

我耳朵好冷 My ears are cold.

故事講到這裏 This is the part of the story

我希望你正在好奇 where I hope you're wondering

像我這樣的好人怎麼會淪落成罪犯 how a nice guy like me ends up becoming a criminal.

喂？ Hello?

這東西開着嗎？ This thing on?

喂？ Hello?

媽的！ Shit!

拜託 杜安 Come on, Duane.

早上好 呃 歡迎光臨麥當勞 Good morning. Uh, welcome to McDonald's.

我讓你稍等一下 I'm gonna put you on a brief hold.

搞什麼鬼 杜安？ What the hell, Duane?

我不能責怪我的父母 I can't blame my parents.

我有個美好的童年 I had a good childhood.

我從來就不擅長讀書或循規蹈矩 I was just never good at school or behaving.

但我在某些方面確實很有天賦 But I was good at certain things

這些天賦對軍隊來說極具價值 that were really valuable to the military.

但退伍之後 But after my discharge,

我不知道自己該何去何從 I didn't know where I fit or what to do

也不知道該如何給予我的孩子們其他孩子所擁有的東西 or how to give my kids the things that other kids had.

於是我做出了一些糟糕的選擇 這些選擇讓我失去了其他選擇的機會 So I made some bad choices that took away some other choices.

而那些錯誤的選擇都始於兩年前 And those bad choices all started two years ago

在我女兒的六歲生日派對上 at my daughter's sixth birthday party.

好了 你得許個大願望 All right, you got to make a big ol' wish.

再來一個 One more.

你許願了嗎？許了什麼願？ Did you make a wish? What'd you wish for?

一輛自行車 自行車？ A bike. Bike?

我不確定自行車能不能正好裝進 I don't know if a bike is exactly gonna fit

這個箱子 不過...把它撕開吧 into this box, but... rip it open.

我要跟你比賽 沒錯 I'm gonna race ya. Yeah.

你怎麼看？ What do you think?

很酷吧？這是我那套老式建築模型玩具 It's cool, right? It's my old Erector Set.

我們打開看看 Let's open it up.

這裏面有200個零件 There's 200 pieces in here.

不！ No!

我是說 有發動機、齒輪、滑輪、 I mean, you got engines, you got gears, pulleys,

輪子、車燈、開關 wheels, lights, switches.

有了這東西 我們幾乎能造出任何想要的東西 We can make almost anything that we want with this thing.

聽着 凡是你能想到的 我們都能造出來 明白嗎？ Look, anything that you can dream, we can make it, okay?

你和我一起幹 意下如何？ Me and you. What do you say?

能用它造輛自行車嗎？ Can you make a bike with it?

是啊 Yeah.

是啊 Yeah.

真不敢相信我認識的那個82年的傢伙 I can't believe the dude I knew

連輛自行車都買不起 from the 82nd can't even afford a bike.

那你倒是說說你怎麼混得這麼好 Well, tell me how you're doing so well.

讓我想想 Well, let me see.

就在這周 我幫兩個日本人搞到了護照 Just this week, I got two Japanese dudes passports.

每本五千美金 That's 5K a pop.

假護照要五千美金？ Five grand for fake passports?

不 是真護照 老兄... No, for real passports. Man...

需要我幫忙嗎？ Can I help you with that?

幫個屁忙 你不行 Hell motherfucking no, you can't.

你啥也幫不上 You can't help me with shit.

你瘋了嗎？ You crazy, man?

你他媽根本幫不上任何忙 You ain't helping me do a goddamn thing.

我不需要你的幫助 I don't need your help.

再說了 我們都知道循規蹈矩 Plus, we already know that doing things the right way

本就不是你的強項 is not your superpower.

無所謂 那... Whatever. That's...

好啊 那你倒是說說我的強項是什麼？ Okay, then tell me what my superpower is, then?

請賜教 佛陀 嗯 Enlighten me, Buddha. Mm.

那條水管的流量是多少？ What's the flow rate on that hose?

每分鐘12加侖 嗯哼 12 gallons per minute. Mm-hmm.

這條街上有多少棟房子？ How many houses is on this street?

二十八 Twenty-eight.

其中有多少棟有煙囪？ And out of those, how many got chimneys?

車庫呢？ Garages?

有多少戶使用熱泵而非傳統空調？ How many of 'em use a heat pump instead of a traditional AC?

你是想讓我推銷暖通空調系統還是怎麼的？只是... You want me to sell HVAC systems or something? Just...

不 不 老兄 我是想說明一個觀點 No, no, man, I'm trying to make a point.

那就請說明你的觀點 Then make the point, please.

觀察 Observation.

細節 Details.

你能看到別人看不到的骯髒勾當 You see shit people don't see.

你簡直像是有透視眼似的 You got like a little X-ray vision going on.

怎麼 你以爲他們把你送到中美洲是因爲你槍法準嗎？ What, you think they dropped you off in Central America 'cause you a good shot?

你是這麼想的嗎？不 不是的... Is that what you think? No. No...

不 他們拋棄你是因爲你的洞察力 No, they dropped you because of what you see.

媽的 要是我有你這樣的頭腦 Shit, if I had a brain like yours,

我早就統治這該死的世界了 I'd be running the whole goddamn world.

你是我見過最聰明的蠢貨 You know, you the smartest dumb nigga I ever known.

這太瘋狂了 That shit crazy.

你現在可以不用繼續往泳池裏放水了 You can stop filling up that pool now.

根本沒人會進去的 Ain't nobody gonna get in there.

那玩意兒冷得要命 That shit cold as hell.

所以 媽媽多半會想知道 So, Mama is probably gonna want to know

派對辦得怎麼樣 嗯 我覺得我們盡力了 how the party was, and, yeah, I think we did our best.

你怎麼看？ What do you think?

泳池的事或許就別提了 Maybe we don't mention the pool.

重要的是嘗試 對吧？ It's the trying that counts, right?

媽媽！ Mommy!

生日快樂 壽星女 Hi, birthday girl.

你的派對怎麼樣？ How was your party?

大家都盡力了 Everybody did their best.

哦 你準備好參加另一個派對了嗎？ Oh. Are you ready for your other party?

你好 Hi.

你好嗎？ How are you?

嘿 我能跟你聊一下嗎？ Hey, can I talk to you for a second?

很快很快 就一會兒 Real-real quick, real quick.

我知道最近幾個月很不容易 I know the last few months haven't been easy,

而我們卻沒有真正需要的東西 and we don't have the things that we actually need,

這是我的錯 我承認這一點 and that's my fault and I own that.

好嗎？我承認 但我覺得我現在已經想明白了 Okay? I do, but I-I think I have it figured out now.

我只需要運用我的超能力 I just got to use my superpower and

集中精力在我想要的事情上 你的超能力呢？ put my brain on what I want. Your superpower?

你的超能力？是的 Your superpower? Yes.

我做不到 傑夫 聽着...不行 I can't do this, Jeff. Look-- No.

我受夠了 拜託 別這樣 I'm done. Come on, please don't do this.

再見 Goodbye.

好的 香蕉腦袋 All right, banana head.

說再見吧 Say goodbye.

愛你！ Love you!

等等 等等 等等 等等 等等 等等！ Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

我沒有怪她嘲笑我 I didn't blame her for laughing at me.

沒有怪她覺得我是個笑話 For thinking I was a joke.

但她對我有些事並不瞭解 But there were things that she didn't know about me.

那些並不那麼好笑的事 Things that weren't so funny.

史蒂夫知道我的能耐 Steve knew what I was capable of.

我確實能看到別人看不到的東西 I do see things that other people don't see.

就像現在 我看見那個孩子正爬上梯子 Like right now, I see that kid climbing up that ladder,

而且我知道在那脆弱的屋頂下面 and I know that under that flimsy roof

這是一臺能把碎牛肉和土豆變成鈔票的機器 is a machine that turns ground beef and potatoes into money.

同樣的用餐區域 With the same dining room,

同樣的油炸鍋閃爍着紅色計時燈 the same deep fryers with blinking red timer lights,

同樣的奶昔機提供着那兩種固定口味 the same shake machine with the same two flavors

同一個裝滿週末公司漢堡收入的保險箱 and the same safe full of weekend corporate burger money

沒人會注意到少了這筆錢 that no one was gonna miss.

每家麥當勞都會在週一早上 They empty that safe at the exact same time

同一時間清空那個保險箱 on Monday morning at every single McDonald's.

你好 歡迎光臨麥當勞 Hi. Welcome to McDonald's.

你想好要點什麼了嗎？ Do you know what you want?

嗯？ Huh?

嗯 嗯 嗯 嗯 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

呃 是的 我想好了 Um, yeah, I figured it out.

謝謝 Thank you.

全美有超過一萬家 There are over 10,000

幾乎一模一樣的麥當勞 almost identical McDonald's across the United States.

你需要搶多少家 Question was: How many do you need to rob

才能買得起真正的房子 to get a real house,

給孩子買些好東西 就能贏回你的家庭？ buy your kids nice things and win your family back?

結果答案是 45 Turns out, the answer is 45.

屋頂大盜又出手了 The Roofman has struck again,

在這家麥當勞的屋頂上開了個洞 cutting a hole through the roof of this McDonald's

位於費耶特維爾市麥迪遜街與朱厄爾街的拐角處 at the corner of Madison and Jewell in Fayetteville.

可想而知 這是一次可怕的經歷 As you can imagine, this was a terrifying experience.

他闖進來 把我們扔進冰櫃 He came in, threw us in the freezer

還把他的外套給了我 and gave me his coat.

他把外套給你了？是的 He gave you his coat? Yes.

呃 是的 他不想讓我着涼 Uh, yeah, he didn't want me to be cold.

他其實人真的很好 He was actually really nice.

警方認爲這是同一名嫌疑人 Police believe this is the same suspect

他一直在我們社區製造恐慌 who has been terrorizing our local community

已犯下45起案件... with 45 incidents...

嗯...僅過去這一年 Mm. ...this past year alone.

我們已繪製出屋頂大盜的畫像 We have a sketch of the Roofman.

他總是戴着口罩 He is always wearing a mask.