South Park

Welcome to Netflix.

Last year, we approved 16 original shows and movies,

and this year, it is our goal to make that number 1,087.

That's why we here at Netflix are thrilled to be working

with you two comedy geniuses, Terrance and Phillip.

Classic stuff.

Now go ahead and pitch what you're thinking

for your Netflix original series.

Well, we were thinking that we'd do a show

where Phillip and I are on a farm.

With a cow.

Okay, I love it so far.

The sun is just starting to come up, and then...

I fart on Phillip.

And I say, "Terrance! You farted!"

And I...

fart on Terrance.

And then it's like a back and forth kind of thing? It's sort of like a ‐‐

It's like a back and forth kind of thing.

I fart on him.

He...

farts...

on...

On you. Got it.

No!

On the cow.

Welcome to Netflix, you sons a bitches! Yeah!

Hooray.

Come on, Tweek! Hurry!

What's going on?

Cartman and his girlfriend are fighting again!

God damn it.

Sweetheart! Piece of shit!

Honey! I wanna watch "Terrance and Phillip"

tonight with my friends!

You promised we'd have a date night!

Ugh!

It's just one night, babe!

Stan is having a viewing party, honey!

So then why can't I come?!

"Terrance and Phillip" is guys' night thing baby!

Hey, hey, hey, hey!

What the hell are you all doing?!

Watching Heidi get her bitch‐ass kicked!

you, Wendy!

Don't take that crap, Heidi!

Let Cartman have it!

Guys! Guys, this has gone on way too long!

Can't we all stop being so mean to each other?

Shut up, Kyle. You sound like your mom.

That was awesome, baby. I love you.

I love you, too, babe.

Aww... Damn it.

Fights over. Kyle ruined it!

All right, everyone. Listen up.

As you know, there has been a lot of bullying

and insensitivity at our school.

To counteract this, it is my firm belief

that South Park Elementary

is in desperate need of a strong woman.

So in looking for a new vice principal,

we wanted to find a powerful, intelligent,

and independent female to be a role model for us all.

And with that said, I'd like to introduce

our new vice principal ‐‐ Strong Woman.

Thank you, PC Principal.

All right, everyone. Listen up.

I'm the new vice principal of the school.

My name is Strong Woman.

I've already spent a few days here at the school

watching and observing,

and we definitely have things we can all be working on.

Hey! Stotch!

You do not disrespect Strong Woman

by talking when she's talking.

You really think I couldn't have handled that myself?

Oh! Uh, I was just making sure everything was ‐‐

You really had to grab the mic out of my hand like that?

Shit. I mean ‐‐ No, sorry. Sorry, I'm not ‐‐

Uh, here you go.

I want the girls here at this school

to know that they can talk to me about anything.

But I also want the boys to know

that what I'm looking for is a better place for everybody.

Turning this school around

is going to take work from everyone.

From everyone.

I'm sorry. Am I not doing this correctly?

No. No. Sorry! I thought I'd add ‐‐ Just add for emphasis.

You felt it wasn't strong enough, me saying it?

No, I'm ‐‐ Uh, I'm sorry.

I'm looking forward to being your vice principal.

And I'm looking forward to turning this school around.

All right. Now, if we have any que‐‐

I'm not finished.

Right! Oh, I'm sorry.

Pay attention, everybody!

It's "The Terrance & Phillip Show!"

On Netflix.

Hey, Terrance!

What did the black lawyer say to the Muslim priest?

I don't know, Phillip. What?

Come in!

Did we miss it? It's just starting.

Oh, look, honey ‐‐ Kyle's mom is here!

Shouldn't you be at Temple, Ms. Broflovski?

Hola.

Would you like to buy some chimichangas?

Sí, mi amigo!

Here. I'll give you two pesos.

Dude, that's awesome!

Wha‐What's wrong, dude?

For the first time, I feel kinda bad

for the person being farted on.

Ohp. Kyle's mom doesn't like the cartoon, guys.

Better shut it off.

Baby, I love you so much.

All right, everyone. Listen up.

As you all know, we've been looking for a strong woman

to take on the roll of vice principal at this school.

We couldn't be happier with the selection we've made,

and we're sure she'll be making our school a better place.

So with that, let me turn over the floor

to our new vice principal ‐‐ Strong Woman.

Thanks, everyone. All right. Listen up.

I fully appreciate that some of you

might be uncomfortable with me being here.

Earlier today, I noticed that some faculty

weren't sure whether to call me Miss Woman or just Strong.

If I were a man, you'd probably address me

as Vice Principal Woman,

so why would it should it be any different, huh?

We good? M'kay.

So I've been getting to know some of the students here,

and I'm definitely hearing

a lot of frustration and confusion

over issues that all the schools are facing right now.

I also spent some time observing in the cafeteria

and was pretty shocked by the abusive and intolerant language.

[ Hootie and the Blowfish's "Hold My Hand" plays ]

Not sure if any of you have noticed,

the toxic environment that's been created.

We have a lot of work to do here, I intend to do it quickly.

Excuse me. I‐I'm sorry,

but, uh, is anyone else hearing Hootie and the Blowfish

like very, very softly?

Yeah, yeah. I hear it.

It's ‐ It's coming from over here somewhere.

Excuse me, everyone. I, um ‐‐ I need to get to the restroom.

Sorry. I'll be right back.

Hold on, hold on. Over here. Over here.

Join together, let no man ‐‐

Ugh!

That's it. That's it, Kyle.

No more.

No more of them doody jokes.

No more watching cartoons of people ‐‐

people having to go doody,

and poo‐pooing on each other's heads.

It's not funny anymore, is it, Kyle?

[ Hootie and the Blowfish's "Hold My Hand" plays ]

Hello there, Mister...

Principal, is it?

That's right. I'm PC Principal.

What's bringing you in today?

I'm, uh, having this problem with my ears.

There's like a persistent kind of a... ringing going on.

Okay. Can you describe the ringing?

It's, uh, Hootie and the Blowfish.

You're hearing a song?

Yeah, um, there's a new woman

that has joined our faculty. Her name is Strong Woman.

And, uh, she seems to have set off

some kind of device in my ears.

So, maybe you're having some feelings for her.

No, that couldn't be it. We work in the same place,

so it'd be impossible for me to like her.

I'm thinking there must be some kind of device in my ears.

Well, I looked,

and Hootie and the Blowfish aren't in your ears.

I believe your hearing them in your mind and your heart.

Oh. Dude.

Bro.

You may enter.

Vice Principal Woman?

Yes? What can I do for you?