Sparrows Dance

Bye, Martha.

Toni, are you still up?

Toni?

Yes.

It's me. It's Sam. Can I come in?

Yes, Sam.

Mind if I put your light on? Yes.

I knew you were out. I was sound asleep, I've got a headache.

Okay.

I've got something to tell you, Toni.

Yes, Sam.

It's my house. You fucked her in my bed?

Did you fuck her on my fucking bed? Did you fuck on my bed?

You're not going home.

There's two teenagers on the street.

One of them is trying to steal something.

The guy is trying to steal something from the girl,

but the girl's screaming for help.

Somebody help me! Stop it!

On Clinton between Houston and Stanton.

Help me!

Do something. What's wrong with you fucking people?

Jesus!

Help me! Fuck you. Go back to her.

Fuck. Fucking do something.

Fuck you. No, I ain't gonna give you shit.

Get help!

Please, I fucking beg. Fucking help me! Somebody help me!

Somebody!

Summer may seem far away...

...but now is the time to plan.

Check out the Fresh Box Summer Camp...

Hi. Yes. For delivery, please.

My number is 347-989-3792.

Yeah. That's the address. Uh-huh.

Yes, 5F. Right.

Um... I'd like the scallion pancakes, broccoli and garlic sauce.

Um... Large.

And, um, yeah, hold on. What do you want, Jim?

Uh, yeah, I'll have a vegetable fried rice and...

Oh, and a ginger ale.

Did you hear him? Oh, good. Okay.

Um, cash. Yeah.

Okay, thank you. Oh, wait. Oh, fuck. Hello?

Yeah. Hi. Could you tell me how much that is?

Yeah, hello? Oh, hi.

Delivery.

Yeah. No. Hold on a second, Charles.

Yeah, yeah. Do you see the money?

Yeah, I see it.

Could you please just leave the bag of food on the floor there

and take the money, okay?

Yeah, yeah. No, I know. Yeah, it's here.

Yeah. Okay? Okay.

Thank you.

What? Do you want me to leave it here?

Yeah. Yeah, right.

Okay.

Thanks so much. Have a good night.

Okay, you too.

Personally, I like to jump off rocks

and bridges and things into water.

I know some people like to go shopping

and some people like to shoot guns.

Recycling feels pretty good.

But if you found something that makes you feel truly alive

and it doesn't hurt anybody else while you do it,

well done, you won the game of life.

What the fuck? What the fuck?

(SHOUTS) Water!

Water? Now? What the fuck?

Water! What the fuck about?

It's draining down all over my fucking soccer jersey!

Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck.

You got water flooding all over the fucking hallway

and down into the stairwell.

Fuck. I see it.

Thank you. It's the toilet. Shit. I'm sorry!

Thank you so much. I'm so sorry. I'm on it. Thank you.

Fuck. (GROANS)

Can I just speak to one of your plumbers by phone?

You could look it up by phone.

No, I understand that it would cost money.

I'm saying maybe one of your plumbers could walk me through it by phone

and we could figure it out on the phone.

That's not how you do things? Does that mean you won't do it like that?

Fine. So my options are what?

Yes. I want to fix the toilet.

No, I'm not a fucking plumber. I think you fucking know that.

Yeah, excuse my French.

Okay. Fine. Send the plumber over.

Wait, it's really not possible that we could do this by phone?

Hello?

Plumber.

Hello?

A lot of locks, huh?

This ain't a bad part of town, is it?

Not particularly, no.

You got a great ramen noodle shop downstairs.

You must visit it frequently.

Not really. No?

You're missing out. It's very authentic.

Not that I've ever been to Japan.

Have you?

Yes.

A long time ago.

Cool.

May I come in?

Yes. Sorry.

Let's see what we got here.

This the culprit?

Hey, can we move this footstool over and put this on it?

Oh, yeah.

Let's see what we got.

Well, not out of nowhere, it was making noises the past few weeks.

Gee, what kind of noises?

It would start running and then it would stop and make a sort of a...

Well, like that, but quiet.

I don't know what that is. Could you do it again?

No, I'm not. That was good. That was a good faulty toilet imitation.

I'm gonna get out of the way. You're not in the way.

Is it okay if I walk around your apartment in my boots?

Nothing hidden under the floorboards?

What? No.

and my boot went right through the floorboard, like...

Boom, boom, boom.

Just like that. You wanna hear it again?

Boom, boom, boom.

It was cool, though. He was a nice old guy.

He had a kerosene stove.

And a sap.

A blackjack, a sap is a blackjack. He was a nice guy.

Over on 16th Street on 7th Avenue.

I'm gonna go over there to the kitchen, okay?

Great.

You got no flow. What?

You got no flow in here, in my opinion.

Oh.

Don't worry. I'll fix it.

Is there anything I can do?

Nah, just sit loose.

You mean "hang tight"?

Okay. Yeah. Hang tight.

You got somewhere you gotta be?

I can keep working, but it's gonna be a while longer.

Okay.

Okay. Yeah? You can stay? I can work longer?

Yes.

Hey. Hmm?

So, I'll have to come back tomorrow, okay?

What? Why?

You have, like, a work schedule issue?

Because I can schedule it for later in the week.

I just figure you wanna get it fixed as soon as possible.

I do wanna get it fixed as soon as possible.

So, tomorrow is okay then?

You couldn't fix it now? What happened?