Tell Me Lies

- So, was he there? - Yeah.

They were both there.

You're doing a really good job pretending not to hate me.

- I'm not pretending. - Really?

- Really. - Evan, he's been different.

Like, he's uncomfortable all the time.

- Oh, my God. You cheated. - Okay, yeah. Once.

- Who was it? - Just some random girl.

Chris! Guys, this is Lydia's brother.

- Hey! - Oh, hey! Wow. This is Leo.

He was studying abroad last year.

Look, I'm sorry, but the class is full.

I'm just, like, a total fucking disaster...

That's quite a performance you gave earlier.

I really wanted him to let me in the class,

- so I figured to start crying. - That's very sick.

- So, you're in my wife's class? - Yeah.

I'm really sorry for hurting you so badly last year.

I embarrassed you over and over and over again,

and I probably eroded any sense of dignity you had.

- What the fuck!? - You're right. I am so mad.

And I know you probably love that,

but I swear to God, Stephen, if you keep fucking with me,

I will destroy your life.

# Happy birthday to you #

# Happy birthday to you #

# Happy birthday, dear Bree #

# Happy birthday to you #

Okay.

Pretty sure that this is what you wished for.

What!?

Puswa! And wait.

Oh, my God, you guys!

I'm gonna put it on right now.

Evan, take a pic.

Oh, my God, I love it!

Okay, so this is from me.

# We own that, if you need everything #

# We own that, yeah #

# Took many days and many nights #

Holy shit.

Wow.

They're so...

- fancy. - Yeah. You like 'em?

They're... beautiful. Thank you.

D-Did you want something else?

No! No. I-I-I just...

I've never had jewelry like this before.

No, you don't have to do that. It's okay.

I can... I can get you something else.

Evan, stop. I-I really love them.

- We're gonna go get a drink! Bye! - Yep, we'll be back.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Hi. Hi. - Hi. Hey.

- Can I tell you something? - Yeah.

- You're very attractive. - Oh, my God.

- What? We've all talked about it. - That's...

just not... not true.

Your, uh, your friend's... she's shy. Isn't she?

- So shy. Classic introvert. - Mm.

Why don't you just take 'em off? I can exchange them.

You don't need to exchange them. They're beautiful.

I'm just not used to getting gifts like this.

I was just a little bit embarrassed

opening up something so fancy in front of everyone.

Well, I wanted to do dinner with just me and you,

and I would have given them to you there,

but you wanted to do a group thing.

- Okay, that's not the point. - Why do you seem annoyed?

I-Is it because I gave you the wrong gift?

No! It's because you're being so weird.

How am I being weird? I-I'm just trying to make you happy.

I don't know!

Honestly, I don't even know what we're talking about right now.

Hey! Why do you guys look so serious? You're the birthday girl!

What?

You know what? This is becoming a weird night.

I should just go home. Why don't you stay here with your friends?

You sure?

Yeah, it's fine.

- Love you. - Love you, too.

We should do this again.

- What, run into each other randomly? - No.

You know what I mean. Can I get your number?

You know what, actually?

And now, you have mine.

Yeah, look at that.

Bree.

That was your name, right?

Yeah.

- Hi. - Hi.

How are you?

- Right now, irritable. - Oh, okay.

What's, uh, what's "puss-wuh"?

Oh, uh, it's "poo-swá."

It was a-a gift from my friends.

We have this joke where, like,

puswa is the French word...

for... pussy.

- Puswa. I like that. - Thanks.

- What's... What's going on in there? - Fucking trivia night.

Some of the other professors organized it.

I was just trying to have a quiet drink on my way home.

Didn't realize. Otherwise, I would steer well clear.

Yeah, you d-don't seem like you'd be into trivia night.

Well, luckily no one smokes anymore, so I had an excuse to sneak out.

I just snuck outta my own birthday party.

It's your birthday?

Yeah.

Why did you sneak out?

I was tired.

Actually, I just wasn't having any fun.

That probably sounds like a silly reason.

No, no. Sounds like the best reason.

Though, technically birthdays should still be fun at your age.

What happened?

I had a stupid fight with someone.

My boyfriend.

Well, for what it's worth,

I had a pointless argument today as well.

So, why don't you humor me for a minute

and tell me about yours? Make me feel better about mine.

Basically, I was embarrassed

because he got me these earrings,

and they're just...

they're, like, the most expensive thing that I've ever touched.

I don't know. He got all weird because he thought

that I didn't like them, and I didn't wanna make a scene,

but it became one. And I told you it was stupid.

But, you didn't like the earrings.

No.

That wasn't the point.

Ah, it's frustrating when people listen to you

without actually hearing what you're saying.

Yeah. Yeah. That's...

That's pretty much exactly what it was.

Did that make you feel better about your argument?

Oh, definitely. Yeah. Mine wasn't nearly as stupid.

Could I have a cigarette?

Sure.

I don't... really smoke.

No.

The earrings look dumb, don't they?

May I?

Ah, they don't look dumb.

But I'd say the sweatshirt's more your style.

Well, that's time for me.

Wish me luck.

Good luck.

Oh, and, uh,

happy birthday.

How was Bree's birthday last night?

Fine.

Anybody fun there?

No. Just Pippa and...

- Lucy. - Mm, right. Great, cool.

I can't tell Bree who to be friends with, dude.

I know. It's just irritating. I break up with her,

she's just around all my friends, you know?

- What are you worried about? - Nothing.

I just don't want her talking about me. That's all.

What could she possibly say that's worse than the shit we already know?

Anyways, the whole night was a mess.

Me and Brie got in a stupid fight about nothing, and I...

I just feel like a real piece of shit, man.

And I know that I'm making it worse

by having these stupid fucking arguments about nothing.

I'm sorry, dude. Fuck.

What happened to your iPhone?

Uh, it got smashed.

- Fuck, man. - Just a stupid fucking accident, yeah.

Sorry, man.

Hey, about the Bree stuff.

Listen. Is she someone you wanna be with, you know,

for good?

Yeah.

Yeah, she is.

Honestly,

maybe you should tell her the truth.

What the fuck? Are you serious? Why the fuck would I do that?

My natural impulse is to lie.

Obviously, that's what I did last year with Diana.

And in the end, that just created this, like, bigger fucking mess.

I'm trying to be less of an idiot now.

And this is your genuine advice? To tell Bree the truth?

You're gonna do what you want.

But what if you do end up, you know, together in the end?

This is gonna be eating at you forever.

I mean, look at you now. You're miserable.

Also, Evan, I don't wanna freak you out, okay?

She might already sense it.

I mean, maybe that's why she's being so weird.

Maybe deep down, she knows it.

She's just waiting for you to say it.

- That's a good color. - Is it?

I don't even know if it's good eye shadow.

That's cute.

- Hey. - Hey.

- Are you feeling any better? - Yeah.

Sorry I left so early. I...