Amu

The white zone is for immediate loading...

...and unloading of passengers only.

No parking.

If I have to see one more monument today, I'm done for.

Let's go home now.

Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Would you look at that? What is that?

That? It's for election campaigns.

Stop, stop! I want to get that on my camera. Stop, stop, stop.

Hey! What are you doing?

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Okay, I'm going around and coming back.

Careful!

Hey, careful, Kaju.

Uncontrollable. Typical Roy.

If your wife has complaints, then startle her tonight.

I have the cure for you. It's to increase your might.

This oil is for enlargement.

To make your life, your daily life, a delight.

Mom, I can't tell you how much I love being in India.

And with the family.

I still can't understand why you didn't want me to come.

Things are so crazy here and so real, you know?

I feel very foreign.

Yet sometimes, something tugs at me deep inside.

- I'm sorry, I don't understand. - Heads are need to cover.

Oh. Sorry.

It's almost been a month. I miss you.

Today we're going to the village, to the place where I was born.

Now what?

First the tractor and now this.

I knew we shouldn't have come to this far out.

Arre, wait, wait, relax. Don't worry. I'll just fix it.

It's amazing to actually be here, you know?

Yeah.

I wish I could remember something.

Should we go now?

Let Kaju come.

Uncle.

Come sit here.

I want to get a shot of you guys for Ma.

Gran, do you want to say something to Ma?

Is she here that I can speak to her?

Gran, she's going to send this to America.

Just speak into the camera.

Keya, come quickly.

In just one month your daughter's turned my hair white.

Look, Ma, she finally stopped dying it.

Shoo, you wicked child.

But honestly, to have this child with me after all these years...

...it's just so lovely.

- How much is that? - Five rupees.

It's okay. Just give me 4.

Here's 10. Keep the change.

What's her name?

Durga.

- Shall we go? - Yeah.

Come. Oh, you bought a gulaak . Nice.

Come on, Kaju, you were so young.

You're right. I mean, I was only 3.

But seriously, I can't remember anything.

-Yeah. Okay, listen. -Hmm?

Do you want to come for this party?

-No. -Come on, Kaju. It'll be fun.

No. I don't know anyone.

There'll be lots of people from different colleges. So you'll get to know people.

Come on. India's not just villages. It has cities also.

-Oh, really? -You should see them.

Come, you haven't even met Siddharth yet.

-Come, Kaju. Come, come, please. -Okay. Fine. I'll come.

It's okay, Bela, we'll make the beds.

Good night.

So who else is going to be there?

Everyone. Siddharth will be there.

-Ha-ha-ha. -Yay. Ha, ha.

Hey.

Are we leaving anytime soon?

Why? Curfew's not till 1.

- Are you getting bored? - No, I'm fine.

It's just.... Ha, ha. It's part of my Indian education.

The sociology of the elite Indian 20-somethings.

-I'm missing out on the joke. -You won't get it!

Oh, hi. I didn't see you.

It's nice out here, isn't it?

I'm Kajori Roy, by the way. Kaju.

I'm Kabir. Kabir Sehgal.

Um, I believe there's, like, a famous mosque around here.

Oh, that's the Hazrat Nizamuddin.

He was a famous Sufi saint. 15th century.

And it's not a mosque. It's a shrine.

-Oh, are you a history major? -No.

It's just stuff you grow up with when you live here.

-You're visiting? -Yeah. I'm from L.A.

So I suppose you're doing the whole tourist thing, huh? Camera and all.

Exploring the ancient India, the exotic India, the spiritual India.

Well, I just want to get to know all of India. The real India because--

Oh, the real India.

And, what? I suppose you'll find it through your foreign lens?

Are you always this quick to put someone in a box?

I just want to get to know India because it's a part of who I am.

Well, it was nice meeting you, Cabron. Or what was it? Kabir.

So half an hour? Let me ask Mamu what the plan is tomorrow.

Um....

Mamu, tomorrow you're practicing for the cultural function, right?

Ah.

Yes. We have to. There are only two weeks left.

So I was thinking...

...I'd go to the university tomorrow.

Because I haven't seen Mom's old college yet, you know?

Why don't we go the day after tomorrow?

- Why? - I'll take you there myself.

-We'll go again. -Um....

Kaju, the university is far off.

You don't know how Delhi is. You'll get lost.

Maima, I went to Mexico alone.

Tell me which bus to take. Write it down for me.

- I'll be fine, I promise. - Bus?

How preposterous! No. Absolutely not.

Excuse me, please! Excuse me.

Hello? Excuse me, please.

No, but I don't want to do it.

I don't have time for it.

Excuse me.

Um, can you tell me where I can get chole bhature?

Is there a good café around here?

Yeah. You can try Balbir's.

What you do is just go straight down and take a right.

Okay, good, thanks.

-Kaju? -Hey.

Tuki didn't tell me you were coming. Come, sit.

Guys, this is Tuki's cousin, Kaju.

- Hey, Kaju. Hi. - Hi, Kaju.

Gobind bhai, meet Kaju. She's come from America.

From America. In my café. My God. It's unbelievable.

This calls for a special tea on the house!

Pappu, make the number one ginger tea special.

Less sugar and use mineral water.

Thank you.

Is this your first time here?

No. Actually, I was born here but then I moved to the U.S. when I was 3.

I just graduated from UCLA.

But then I thought I'd take a break before getting a job or thinking of grad school.

It seemed a good time to get in touch with my roots.

I mean, Dilli is so intense, you know?

Okay, guys, we have to go. Can't bunk Chakki's class.

Kaju, see you around. Kabir, don't forget Shake Soc at 3.

-Bye, guys. Catch you later, bye. -Bye.

What's Shake Soc?

- It's our Shakespeare Dramatic Society. - Shakespeare?

Why? Do you have a problem with that?

No. Maybe I could shoot it through my foreign lens.

Oh, thank you. Pappu?

My good name is Sanjay. Pappu my home name.

Madam, take one shot of me, please.

Pappu. Becoming a film star. Nonsense.

I made you Lakshman in the Ramleela and you couldn't say one line properly.

-So, madam... -Thank you.

...do you make films or something?

- No, I just make documentaries. - Daku? Bandits?

If you like bandits, let me do Daku Gabbar Singh for you.

- It's a brilliant dialogue. - Okay.

For miles.... Ahem.

For miles around mothers get their children to sleep...

...by scaring them with stories about me...

...the dreaded bandit Gabbar Singh!

How many bullets are there? How many bullets?

Six, Boss. Six bullets, three men.

Very unjust!

Very, very unjust!

Ha-ha-ha. That was really cool. Thank you.

That was nothing. My son, the younger one, is even better.

By God, he dances so well.

He easily defeats even Shah Rukh--

Gobind bhai, can I come to your house to shoot?

Why are you pulling my leg?

Maybe that's not such a good idea, Kaju.

Why not? I think it's an excellent education for her.

- Just what she's looking for. - I've got an idea.

Why don't you take Kaju to Gobind bhai's place.

Me. Why?

His name is Kabir. His father is a senior government official.

He's doing Economics Honors. He's very bright. He'll be doing an MBA.

How is that even relevant? I hate corporate types.

No, no. This boy is right.

He'll be the best to show you around Delhi.

Gran, I can....

I can go around Delhi just as well by myself.

Listen to me, sweetheart. Please don't go anywhere alone. For my sake.

Heh. Okay, Gran. But only because I adore you.

Besides, this Kabir is such a dork.

- No, he's not. - He is.

He's the one who knows Delhi the best.

Will you all mind if I ask you something?

We're all ears.

When you wear pants how do you manage to pee?

We don't pee!

How can that be?

Don't you wear pajamas?

With pajamas you can take one leg out, but with pants you can't.

Down with lockouts! Lockouts won't do!

Won't do! Won't do!