Servant

- -

Babe. Babe?

I think we're going. We're going. What is that?

Anyway, I mean, yeah, it was really painful.

And I was so young.

- Ugh. -

You know what I mean?

But the one thing that my mother did right

was not let me hold my baby in the hospital.

That way I didn't have any unhealthy attachments to her.

But Leanne, she's right here.

And watching another woman raise her baby.

I... Blows my mind.

I know. But even if it is hers...

... she seems happy enough to

let Dorothy and Sean play house with him.

She's not the most stable ship in the sea, babe.

You can see the leaks springing.

Well, what happens if Leanne just

decides to leave one day and takes her kid?

Then what?

Dorothy is going to look for her son forever?

Seems like a shitty life.

Mmm. Mmm, you have a point.

Gotta have a legal leg to stand on.

Unless we proved it was Leanne's.

- -

Little old for the pole, sis.

Leave me alone.

I have been tasked with covering

a Marilyn Monroe look-alike contest.

And I'll have you know I'm definitely not too old to strip.

Oh, would you make sure Leanne

doesn't let Jericho nap too long today?

He wouldn't settle last night.

I'm exhausted, and I'm fairly certain

Marilyn's curves didn't include heavy bags under her eyes.

Okay.

Oh, tell Sean one of the mothers is

coming by today or tomorrow sometime

to pick up the diaper bag she left behind.

I'll be sure not to.

Ah.

This would be infinitely improved with a fifth of vodka.

So would you.

Amen.

You taking the kid to Aruba?

No, I'm taking Leanne to the park.

You want to come? It's a gorgeous fucking day.

No. I couldn't even get her down the block.

What makes you think she's gonna be cool to stroll in the park?

I think she's ready. We're all making progress.

Pretty soon we'll be a normal fucking family.

Yeah.

About that...

I was thinking we should test Leanne and Jericho's DNA.

Why the hell would we do that?

To know for sure.

And maybe initiate some adoption proceedings.

Make this whole debacle legal.

Julian, things are good. Try not to fuck with it.

You concentrate on you.

- At your place. - I'm just trying to protect this...

Protect what?

Sean from himself. He was talking about a beet latte.

I won't be party to that kind of horror.

I can't find his hat. I'll be right back.

Julian, could you take him for a second while I do this?

Oh, I'm covered in kale. He might be allergic.

Ready?

I found his sunglasses.

Look how tiny they are.

We don't have to go far.

Oh, the flowers. Look.

Look, flowers. Trees.

Did you know you could eat those?

- You can eat flowers? - Well, some.

These are dandelions. The whole thing's edible.

That's mustard flower. There's a purslane.

Oh.

These make a great chimichurri.

Full of vitamins and omega-3s.

You can put it in a soup or a garnish or stew.

It's nice.

- Spare change? - Sure, let me see what I got.

Oh, yeah.

I want to go home.

["SWEETEST THING ON THIS SIDE OF HEAVEN" PLAYING]

Careful. It's hot.

Ugh, put your tongue back in your mouth, Sean.

Not in the mood.

I just found out that while I'm playing dead diva,

Isabelle is covering the Kaplowitz case.

I think yours sounds more fun, Dorothy.

That's very sweet of you, Leanne.

But trust me, there's nothing like a good murder trial.

And do you know why I got stuck with Marilyn?

They said I was curvier. Can you believe that?

Ugh.

You do fill out that dress, Dorothy.

Hey! Stop. You're going to embarrass Leanne.

This tastes like spring.

Soup again, Sean?

I was inspired by our walk.

It's dandelion soup. It's good.

I'm actually not very hungry.

I think this dress has rearranged my organs.

I'm going to go cut myself out of it.

I'll take him for his bath.

- No. I can tell he needs his mommy. -

What's up with you?

Things just aren't right. I'm not sleeping well.

My wife and I keep getting in stupid-ass fights.

You're just coming off your weird cult high.

You'll ride it out. Trust me, you just find your new high.

You haven't seen any of those cult freaks, have you?

They're not messing with you?

No.

Why are we out here anyway?

If your sister or Sean see me, they aren't going to like it.

Well, first,

our usual gym smells like an old man

with a incurable staph infection.

Fuck.

Oh, fuck.

Shit.

Oh, fuck.

And second, I need you to help me get Jericho and Leanne's DNA.

Couldn't be simpler.

I already have all the equipment you'll need.

Yeah. You just shove this up the baby's nose.

No way. Just... Just get one of those kits.

Ah, you have to register, use a credit card.

It takes weeks. I need this now.

You'll be compensated more than fairly.

Julian, I'm done playing pet detective.

And don't shove this up anyone's nose. That's not how it works.

Just this one last thing, for old times' sake.

I'll make a call. For old times' sake.

I got a dude who owes me a favor. He works in a lab.

But I'm only gonna consult.

I'm not stepping foot in that house, and you're still gonna pay.

I don't know what I'd do without you.

Homeless or hipster? Who's to tell?

Who's that for?

Kids in the park. It looked like they were starving.

You want to help me bring it out?

No. I have to put Jericho down.

Hey!

I got some food.

What is it?

Hope you like it. It's, uh... pizza al taglio.

It's a basic Pinello tomato sauce,

and I top it off with a whipped lardo,

and I finish it with a... a grape and onion mostarda.

It's weird, but it's kind of good.

All right, so... Well, look... No, I'll just, uh...

I'll leave you this. You guys help yourself.

Oh, great.

Yeah.

Yeah. Hair from Leanne and Jericho. Easy.

Yeah, but it has to have follicles.

And more is better in case the sample is bad.

Not as easy.

Well, then you'll love this. I need it in the next 30.

He's got a window to process it this evening.

- Results tomorrow. - Okay, head over now,

I'll have it ready. Wait, where are you?

I'm in a hospital, seeing a relative.

And bring the cash.

This kind of turnover isn't cheap, Julian.

I know. Nothing is.

Juju?

Dad?

Help.

Please help us.

Sorry, kid.

This might sting.

- -

Hey. It's okay. It's okay.

Oh, come to me. You're fine. You're fine. It's okay.

Fuck.

- What are you doing? - Fuck!