Party Mom

Are you sure this is the right address?

This is it.

I could, I could drive you to the top.

No, no. It's okay. I'll be all right.

Dad, you can go. I have my phone.

If I call you, then there's a problem.

-But it's fine. -Okay.

Well, I'll wait for you to get in. How is that?

-Love you. -Love you, too.

Hello?

Is anyone there?

Hello?

Are you hot?

What?

I, I can't let you in

unless you're hot.

-Uh, it's Brittany. - You're Brittany?

Yeah, we got a hottie here. New girl.

- Have fun. -You can go.

Go.

-Hi. -Hi.

Hey, you must be Brittany.

Oh, yes. Hi. You must be Ashley's mom.

It-it's nice to meet you, Mrs. Anderson.

Oh, God, don't do that again please.

I am so sorry. What, what did I say?

"Mrs." Don't call me Mrs.

My, my plastic surgeon works way too hard on this face

to be called anything but Jackie. Got it?

-I got it. Yeah. -Why don't you come in?

Ashley's getting dressed upstairs,

she'll be done in a minute.

I mean, you really look more

like Ashley's sister, let's be honest.

Wow, okay.

All right. Now you're getting it.

I think I'm gonna like you.

-Oh, hey, boys. -How you doing, Jackie?

Did you see that? They were checking you out.

-Uh, no. No, they're not. -No, they are.

You know what? You need a drink. Um, what do you want?

Do you want soda, uh, tequila,

beer, wine, vodka, rum?

-Uh, soda is great. -Soda and vodka.

You're my kinda girl. Okay, I'll go get it.

Wait...

Jackie, where'd you go?

I know, we were right in the middle of our drinking game

and I was getting ready to destroy

the new kid down the street.

I'm-I'm sorry, this is, this is Brittany.

This is one of Ashley's new friends.

Um, these are my besties, Rita and Donna.

Hi, Rita and Donna.

-Hi, honey. -H-hi.

Okay, enough with the pleasantries.

-Let's get back to the party. -Okay. Uh--

Don't steal anything.

-Oh, come on, get in here. -Did you notice her shoes?

I mean, where did she get those, big-box?

Oh, my God! Brittany!

I didn't know you were gonna make it.

You didn't post anything online, so...

Well, I don't know.

- What should I post? -Um, I don't know.

Like, "Going to the best party ever at Ashley's place."

Girl, you're right. I didn't even think about it.

Aw, see, that's what I love about you.

You're just, like, so unaware of everything

going on around you.

Oh. Really?

Well, yeah, no, like, it's, it's really endearing.

-I love it. It's super cute. - Good. Okay.

Oh, hey, come on, let's go meet everybody.

Okay.

All right, guys, pose.

Ew, not like that. Pose like you're in an Italian magazine.

-Tag me. -Uh, I don't think so, mom.

-It's cute, right? -Oh, my gosh.

-Do not post that. -Why not?

If my mom sees that, she'll freak.

No, she's gonna love that you're hanging out with awesome people.

Mm, yeah, I guess you're right.

Hey, hey, everyone, it's Ashley, live streaming

from my awesome pool party.

-This is Britt. -Hi, I'm Brittany.

She's new to school and she's super-hot.

So go follow her on her Chatter email account.

Oh, I don't have a Chatter email.

Uh, yeah, you do, I made it for you a few hours ago

and you already have 300 followers.

-Oh, my God. - Help! Somebody help!

Uh, what happened?

- Oh, my God. - Who is that?

Oh, my God. Is he okay?

Is he okay?

Here, grab his arms. Push him up.

Is he breathing? Rita, Donna!

What is going on?

-Come on. -

-Again? -What are you doing?

-Mom, I'm live. -What are you doing?

Do you know how much trouble I could get in to?

Tommy, you got it.

-Okay. -He's coming to.

-Does this mean he's okay? -Don't stop. Okay.

-Okay. Come on. -

You're lucky, Jackie. That boy's father is a lawyer.

I know. I know. That's right.

-He could've taken everything... - I know.

-I know, I know. - It's okay.

Hold on.

Sweetheart? Sweetheart, are you okay? You're doing all right?

I think he just had a little bit too much to drink.

Why don't you go in to one of the guestrooms

and just, and just lay down a little bit?

-Everybody, go have some fun! -

I thought you were gonna pull the plug on the whole thing.

Oh, no, no, baby. Of course not.

-I'm a party mom, right? -Yes, you are.

Go get me a drink.

We're lucky enough to be in the mountains.

The high humidity is going to stick with us

through the rest of the week.

Temps today, downtown will be in the mid-80s,

beaches will be in the upper 70s

and the valley could see triple digits...

Brittany.

Brittany.

Brittany, if you wanna get a ride to meet your friends,

you gotta get up now.

Brittany.

Honey, I've gotta get to work!

Come on. Brittany.

-Come on, sleeping beauty. -Mm.

Sweetie, it is now officially time... to get up.

-Come on. -Mm.

-Come on. -Mm...

You are the one who told me to wake you.

-I'll just ride-share. -No.

You know I don't like those services.

It's, uh, mom, it's safe.

- It's a six show. -I don't need numbers, okay?

It just takes one deviant to ruin your life.

-Mom. -Oh, no, don't you mom me.

Get up now and I will take you before my shift.

Now!

Ugh! Come on!

It's true about teenagers.

All they want to do is sleep.

She was up pretty late last night.

Well, what time did she finally make it home?

-Uh, like, 2 a.m. -What?

That is really late.

-A good morning for your father? -Good morning.

Such enthusiasm.

Good morning, father.

Ah, it's much better.

-What? -I was just wondering.

Are you gonna buy me a car when I turn 16?

-What? -You're kidding, right?

No. Why?

All my friends get cars when they turn 16.

Ashley drives her car all around Beverly Hills.

Okay, well, this is Lake Balboa.

Sweetheart, when you turn 16,

you can drive one of our cars.

But that's not fair.

Do you have any idea

how much private school's gonna cost us?

More money than you could ever imagine.

That's right.

Why does it have to be one or the other?

Because your education is more important than a car.

Okay. Um...

Uh, I need you ready in five minutes.

Wait, five minutes?

I can't be late for work.

Uh, dad, can you take me?

If you don't mind going through Lancaster first.

-Where is Lancaster? -Exactly.

Something's up with her.

Just finish up.

Okay, come on, get in the van.

Okay.

All right, so I'll just, um, see you tonight.

Okay, don't let those annoying

Beverly Hills women...

-Oh, my gosh. -I'll try--

Can you please... Mm...