Swingers (Свингеры)

N. PETRULEVICH, E. EGOROVA, M. SHVETS, V. GRYAZEVA,

E. NIKOLAEVA, E. DOBROVITSKAYA, L. NESTERENKO

Sorry.

How to bring sex back into your life? How to bring back intimacy,

Intimacy in your life? That's the question we asked ourselves.

And we didn’t ask this question by chance, but because you send us a lot of letters.

on a wide variety of topics.

-Contraception, please. -Condoms, or what?

-Yes, that's exactly the word. -There are Chinese ones, cheaper.

- Let's not skimp. I don't want to breed like the Chinese.

German.

Strawberry-scented. -And at what point should you smell them?

I'll read the instructions, yes, I know German.

-Oh, 10 pieces - four hundred rubles! -Six packs, please.

Six packs?

-Let's make it seven. What if I break something?

Seven?..

Buy the girl a gift. She's in for some tough times.

Do you have Scottish heather?

-What? -Scottish heather.

is a natural stimulant. A great gift .

for a shy student. - No, there is no Scottish heather,

But she does have some ammonia, it will come in handy.

Thank you. The smell of strawberries will do.

-Well, Moscow... Your life will never be the same.

SCREAMS

EASY SONG IN ENGLISH

Wake up. We've arrived.

-So, let's share the doctor's gratitude.

This is for you. -Uh-huh.

-It's you again. -Uh-huh.

-Well, the calvados and candies are for me. -I adore your sense of justice.

Listen, Petrovich, would you fix me, please?

Otherwise I've got a chill on my neck and I'm walking around like a flounder. - Listen, let's do it tomorrow.

- "Swing. In Zhulebino." Oh, you, Buzykin,

Oh, you old dog!

Swinging is the exchange of sexual partners for the purpose of obtaining

sexual pleasure. Intimate relations in such cases

occurs in the presence of another pair or even several.

For some couples, it becomes entertainment, variety...

For other couples, a one-time experience is enough to understand,

that their partner is better and closer than others. This helps them relearn

appreciate and understand each other. To agree or not to swing,

It depends on what's on the scale:

a family that is falling apart, or new sensations,

that can save and preserve your family.

-Honey, close your eyes. -What, honey?

-Guess what's there. -Where?

Breasts. The best breasts in our cinema.

-That too. But it's still cold.

Come on, what's there?

Both!

Uh-huh!

I've lost weight. I told you so long ago. I've lost weight. About three hundred grams.

or even seven hundred.

Actually, I'm showing you beads.

Very cute.

Do you want me to tie you up with them? - Missed.

Spanked?

-These are designer beads, I made them myself.

-I see. Well, what should I say? Nice beads.

Do they increase potency?

This is my new business.

Can you even think about anything other than sex ?

-Well, maybe I can, maybe not. I haven't tried. Why should I?

-Well, just so I don't look like a baboon.

Oh, how offensive!

Well, what's wrong?

- Do you feel it? - Did the chicken burn?

This...

This is Scottish heather. The scent of passion.

Does it affect you too? - Yes, I remember, today is the anniversary,

Of course... -Please, please.

You will give me this evening.

-Of course... I have a better offer.

-What? -Just a second, just a second.

I'll fix everything tomorrow, honestly. -Dushik, I'll do it myself, I'll do it myself.

- Honey, look what I have. Oops! Calvados, chocolates.

When we were young, we would have drunk this calvados...

Let's have a wonderful evening. You, me...

Hare, well, forgive me, well, 44 people. I'm tired, I have no strength.

That's all?

So, the anniversary suddenly disappeared?

-I offended my beloved, I didn't notice those damn beads.

Let's make up. I'm wrong. - Sex dolls don't talk.

- So, can you imagine, Buzykina pumped up her lips?

out of envy of you. That's how it is. And an ass to boot.

Like this. Like a Bentley.

Now she doesn't drown in the sea.

-You know I love you terribly. -Well, "terribly" is the key word.

Horrible. Did I send the kids to the dacha for nothing?

The day before New Year's! Are they freezing there for no reason?

- No. They'll finally miss home.

and will gain immunity to the cold.

-Okay. -Well, hare...

-Well, I missed you. -Let's do it tomorrow.

Everything will be okay tomorrow. Honestly.

Bobik... died.

-What lengths won't women go to for their husbands?

-Because of your husband? -Hello!

Why do we need these formalities? We have love,

We're not Buzykins, are we?

SNIFFS

-What? -Duck. Duck!

Wow! I told you, chicken.

-Don't you dare call my Peking duck a chicken.

OK.

Honey, so what are we going to have for dinner?

-What you and your dog deserve.

- I love you with all your quirks and idiocy.

-With a twist? -Yes!

Well... what do I call her?

Individuality, femininity.

Give me, I beg you.

Can you imagine, the Buzykins regularly go to Zhulebino...

change partners.

For real.

We could do that too. -What?!

- Wait, that's not dirty at all. It's not even cheating...

It's just a test. Trust, trust. We trust,

So, to each other. You trust me, I trust you.

What, are we worse than the Buzykins or something?

That's the point, I'm better.

Oh, what beads, huh!

How did you even make these? They're a miracle... not beads.

See, almonds? For my husband's sake. She's already agreed,

just doesn't know about it.

Wait. Well? Let me finish playing.

-Do I even exist for you? -Who?

-Me, me. -What?

-Me. -Ah!

-Do I exist for you? -Listen...

Oh!

Ah, Sanya, hi! How are you? Uh-huh.

Listen, I think I'll hold off on the series for now.

Business is stalling. It happens. Yes, dear.

You know what, you should probably give the role to Buzykina.

Oh well, we'll work some more. Of course. Hugs.

Come on. Yeah. Bye.

- I'll screw everything in tomorrow, I'll nail everything down. I can even glue it on.

Do you want it? I'll do anything. But if you're talking about sex...

Come on, listen, I'm really tired. I just can't. I really can't.

My eye is twitching, I have asthenia, in general.

-Listen, you promised to be with me in joy and in sorrow.

And with asthenia. - Yes.

-Yes? -Uh-huh. Yes.

- Maybe I should call a plumber ?

- Aren't you ashamed at all? Why are you saying such things?

Be careful of the wire!

Oh my God, the wire...

We're going to have sex today, whether you want it or not.

Even if I have to tie you up.

-Who were you talking to? -What are you saying?

-Who were you talking to? -Nobody. With Sanya.

With the producer.

Did you give my role to Buzykina?

Who am I to hand out roles?

Is this blackmail? God, how low!

I'm not going anywhere. - Why did you scare yourself?

Did you pump yourself up? I'm telling you it's not even cheating,

This is a test of feelings, of loyalty. Well, look,

You come, some kind of plumber guy

He opens the door, sees you, and faints. Well, that's cool.

- How do you imagine? I go into some plumber's house and tell him:

"Hello! I'm the famous model Olga Krylova. Let's fuck."

-Well, a plumber, an electrician - that's by the way.

I, for example, am ready for all life's compromises.

Look, we ourselves will have something to remember later.

You will be the first to remember and laugh like the guys.

They opened the door and fainted.

I won't go.

Andryusha...

Andryusha, I wrote to a swingers website.

Well, where couples... agree on sex.

Chelyabinsk.

My God, Arkhangelsk.

Rybinsk. Where's Moscow? The most puritanical city.

-Andryusha! Please nod if you agree.

-What? -I said, nod, please.

If you get what I'm saying. - Just a minute. Can I finish playing now?..

I'll do what you said, okay? - You will? You mean I'm sending it?

Sent.

-Lyubertsy. This is Moscow. Fresh ones.

-Please go hang a shelf in the hallway,

Because people will come to us now. - The Voropaevs are not people - they are parasites.

-That's the beauty of swing, you never know who's going to show up.

Voropaevs, Kozlovs, Sidorovs, Ivanovs. Never.

-Wait, what swing? -Well, what do you mean, what swing?

When exchanging sexual partners.

-Are you serious? -Don't get worked up, don't get excited.

Well, it's just a one-time pleasure.

-Wait, should you consult with me? Should you ask me?

- I asked, you nodded and said when you would finish playing.

Nice people.

And the faces are inspired.

-Okay, well, what did you write? "A couple of perverts are looking for new sensations."

and venereal diseases," right? - That you and I are open to everything.

That's it. - Never, never this house.

will not cross sodomy. Never. - Oh, oh, oh, jumped up, jumped up, started up.

Oh, I'm afraid I'll feel embarrassed for you, Andryusha.