TFW No GF

Everyone my age kind of just grows up on the internet.

when I think back, I think about,

like, what bullshit I was doing on 4chan,

because that's the only...

place that, kind of, seemed real.

Well, this was after I dropped out.

I was so depressed and...

just felt so hopeless, that...

I didn't have the energy to do anything.

I didn't have the energy to talk to anyone.

Uh...

So in a day I'd get up, I'd get something to eat.

It really was just, kind of, sitting in bed and sometimes watching TV,

but other times, it was more like...

...I don't know, just kind of, looking out the window,

just the normal, really weird depressed shit,

that you find yourself doing and don't really know why.

And when I...

found myself on, like, 4chan and Twitter and stuff like that.

I realized that there was,you know, other people who are,

kind of, going through the same shit...

and not really knowing what to do with their lives, or...

if there actually even is anything to really do with your life,

if you're... kind of,

disassociated and indifferent to a lot of things.

I came to realize that I might be stumbling into something

I find really important.

And it did turn out that way.

Something ominous is happening to men in America.

Everyone who pays attention knows that.

Many millennialsare still struggling financially

especially when compared to past generations.

For the first time in the modern era,

young adults are more likely to live with their parents,

than with a romantic partner.

In the 18-to 22-year-old category,

those people scored the highest in terms of loneliness.

Is there indication as to why?

They seem to be alone,

but they are radicalizing

each other in their isolation.

Well, I say that it's a very scary time for young men in America.

It's a very difficult time.

Our response is, "Sucks to be you, loser. Unfollow."

You want a friend? Get a gun.

This is a part of a larger movement,

which is about policing, punishing and persecuting women.

They call themselves The Darkest Reaches

of the Internet, and they're not wrong.

Do we even know who is this 4chan?

4chan.

4chan.

4chan.

Destroy! Die! Attack!

Threats from a gang of computer hackers calling themselves Anonymous.

I believe they're domestic terrorists.

Their name comes from their secret website.

It requires anyone posting on the site to remain anonymous.

They get laughs. They enjoy doing this.

They get what they call, "LULZ."

LULZ is a corruption of LOL,

which stands for Laugh Out Loud.

Bored all the time here in Thornton.

For context, I'm 5'6 and I live in a one-bedroom apartment with my Mom.

I wouldn't necessarily say that I prefer the internet

over anything else, it's just...

that's where I felt most was offered to me,

just in every sense. In a social sense,

in an educational sense.

It's like a river, it just does what it wants with you.

I did all right in school, like, up until

eighth grade and then I just,

kind of, stopped caring about it.

I skipped classes pretty much every single day,

and I got in trouble a lot,

and then I failed ninth grade.

I kind of just dropped off the map.

I dropped out, was going through my own shit.

And since then I've just been a fucking NEET.

I mean, back when I was using 4chan,

the people my age were like, dealing with their parents, who were dealing with the economic crash and stuff like that,

and I was like, "Oh, my parents are divorced

and the future that was sold

to me is a complete lie."

So it's like, I'm just going to do nothing instead.

rok is where the most hopeless and autistic and...

miserable people congregate to flirt with their despair.

You have a shitty day and then you make a green text about it

and you can make it as funny or not funny as you want

and then people will call you a faggot or whatever, and then they'll join in.

And it sounds bad when you don't actually take part in it,

but it's actually-- it's some fun when you're

on board, I guess.

You don't feel like it's a habit.

It just, kind of, becomes something you do

and you kind of wonder what you did before.

I mean, this is a very common thing on rok, where people are saying,

"Alright, today I'm going to kill myself. Do you guys want to tell me anything?"

And then people will say, "Uh, yeah, dude, see you later,"

and stuff like that and just egging them on to do it.

And, I mean, it's funny when it, kind of, starts out,

but you got to think that, "Holy shit.

Maybe some of these guys are actually doing it."

It's like a love-hate kind of thing, just--

there's just, like, nothing else like it.

It's pretty much like any addiction or anything.

My phone tells me, like, every week that I spent, like, seven hours a day on it,

so, I've been with-- online so long.

It's just a part of me.

I just tweet my thoughts as it's happening,

which often are really bad and negative,

or the reactions kind of give you a small dopamine rush and--

Yeah, there's not really much to lose.

Like, I don't really care in a way.

Any publicity is good publicity.

I'd always, kind of, just got those like, suicidal thoughts.

A lot of, like, things risking your life,

like driving really fast or suddenly, like, closing your eyes,

like, while just on the accelerator.

Once it starts happening it-- I just don't even think about it.

My head just kind of, like, clears up,

and my thoughts go away for a minute, which is relaxing

because you can just mess up in a second and it'd all be over.

Man, it's kind of messed up around here.

But, you know, it is what it is.

This is our roommate, it's, uh, Mason.

We go way back, right?

See, alcoholic, NEET,

spergy, awkward, aggressive,

defensive or distant in conversation.

Torrent most of your downloads and games.

Have passed the point in your life when having potential mattered.

Attempted suicide or have had a mental breakdown.

Sleep over ten hours a night or less than six.

Overcrowded or filthy living conditions.

Diagnosed autism, anxiety or depression.

Masturbate at least once a day.

Less than ten happy memories in the past year.

Virgin. Fired from a job or a drop out.

Have been arrested.

Let's see. How many bingos?

That's a bingo.

Oh, that one's close.

Specifically the rule is, you can't make a post

if anyone's made a post with the same exact, like, content.

Like, it has to be completely unique every single time

and an easy way to have a unique post

was people talking really frankly about, like,

personal stories or personal problems,

and that sort of, set the tone for the community.

Stuff like this.

Really just, like, an infinite supply of this shit.

It's funny how it worked out, that, um, Wojak kind of,

remained like an insular part of the communities.

What's more popular nowadays is kind of, like,

the permutations of them.

But those always come and go.

He still has that same lasting power.

I usually wake up around noon.

Take a shower, get dressed and then, um,

just browse Twitter until Charlie gets home.

And then...

whatever he wants to do after that.

We both grew up, not just in the same physical conditions,

but the same digital conditions. So we--

I think we really understand each other really well.

And I lived out, like, in the woods and everything.

There wasn't really anyone our age around.

Nowhere to go. Nothing to do, really.

Our parents were alcoholics, SO...

-They didn't exactly have it together, I guess. - No.

We kind of just spent a lot of time online.

You know, when you're kind of trapped like that,

I guess, the internet definitely opens up

avenues that wouldn't otherwise be present.

You don't really have friends in real life and there's people you can talk to online.

I have a lot of problems just, like, speaking in general,

like, it's really hard for me to say much of anything.

I'm pretty quiet, but...

being able to be online and communicate,

like, my thoughts and feelings

in, sort of, a more eloquent way, it--

it's sort of liberating.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

It almost seems like nobody's here.

It's the kind of place where...

it's all just, like-- like, strip malls and industrial places

and empty lots, burned down buildings and...

None of them seem like actual places you can go to.

They're-- they're like set pieces.