Taxi 2

Left! 3rd!

Jean-Louis Schlesser in his mean machine, No.10. 10 like Zidane!

30 meters, left! Brake!

World rally champion in '98 and '99...

winner of the Paris - Dakar: The man to beat!

Left, top speed!

Get a move on! We'll get slaughtered.

I’m flat out!

The guy behind's flatter out! Watch out!

He's flashing me! Isn't that Vatanen?

No, a taxi!

Move your crate! I’m working here!

Is it the right road? - Short cut!

Short cut.

Don't let a taxi win! - No way.

Sorry, folks. A tourist's blocks the road!

It looks more like a race car.

It's just a clown in a "babe magnet"!

A taxi on our tail sure looks bad!

I’ll shake him now.

He rammed me!

Enough! We'll be here all week!

Nearly there, lady.

Why... why are there so many people here?

They're in vacation.

Oh, right!

C'mon, Jean-Louis! - Bravo, Jean-Louis!

No.10... It’s not Schlesser!

A taxi.

I didn't catch his number.

17 minutes 25 secs!

People always throw up after! Never during!

OK, lady?

Who's it for? - Her! Her water broke!

May I?

You're giving birth! - Well, I ain't knitting!

Get the gear! We'll do it here!

Hey, doc, I gotta run. Use the ground, not my seat!

Water's broken!

Water breaks?

Push!

Breathe! Push!

Hi, Lilly.

30 minutes late for lunch with my folks!

Yeah, I’m on my way.

Daniel, you're finally meeting my Dad. He's expecting you!

This is a super-big emergency!

What are my folks? Diesel?

Lilly, come on!

Mom's edgy, Dad's pacing the floor. But hey, take your time!

I can't help it, I’m stuck tight here!

"Stuck"? Who's yelling?

It’s... a woman.

Thanks! I guessed that much! What's up?

I’m just watching. It’s not what you think, you hear me?

I can hear that bitch! Is it someone I know?

No! I don't know her either! I just met her!

Oh, I feel it now!

I feel it!

Don't fuck with me!

You've got some slut there while I wait for you!

No! This big woman's yelling 'cause her water snapped!

Her husband's here. - Husband, too? A threesome in a car!

Oh, no! Someone tell her! I don't know I can.

Here! This is your fault.

I’m the husband. It’s marvellous!

Daniel, he's dead meat!

He's all shook up, that's all. Want to talk to the doctor?

A doctor, too!

Lilly, I swear it's the truth!

The baby's coming out.

It’s a baby, I swear! - A baby?

I see the head! I think it's a head!

Your baby?

No, it's not! He's nothing like me I swear!

He's as wrinkly as an old garden gnome!

Marvellous!

You're messing me about! - Just listen!

This woman just gave birth. Outside the clinic, in my taxi!

She's ruined my back seat!

Don't hit that poor kid! I can't hear a thing now!

Marvellous!

You be there when I give birth!

I can sit and wait if you like. This place looks fine.

You got 10 minutes!

Not twins? Is it a wrap?

No offence, but I gotta run!

Ah, hon!

Problem with your friend?

An emergency at the hospital. A difficult birth.

I understand. Saving lives all day. I respect that.

I don't know what to say. You were wonderful!

I know! - I hope you won't lose your license.

I don't have one!

I am quite pleased... moved, even...

to give you... your first...

driver's...

license!

You sure? - Yep!

I don't want to twist your arm.

No doubt about it, it's just fine!

It’s not 'cause it's my 27th time?

Your 100th time would be the same!

You're ready. Really ready.

OK, I accept. - That's fine.

I’ll back out. - No!

Leave it!

Don't touch! Leave it!

I’ll do it! I’ll sort it out!

We'll sort it out!

Don't I have my license?

Yes, you do! But don't go to extremes.

Take it smoothly.

Your license is in your hand.

Now you go home. On foot! See?

I see. I’ll call tomorrow in case you regret it.

No! I won't be around, nor the following days.

I got transferred to Paris.

This a leaving present? - For my most regular pupil!

Yeah, right.

"Regular"!

Car Weekly, please.

That's OK.

My pleasure!

Mom, he's here.

Yes, of course! Let's eat!

Sorry, it won't happen again.

Not if you screw this up! My dad's real strict.

Oh, come on, deep down, he must be nice.

His daughter's eyes are so blue!

You just be careful! - Don't worry, it'll be OK.

I know I’ll like him, so he'll like me!

Is he a cop? - No!

OK, then! Ain't nothing worse than a cop!

Dad? I’d like you to meet my boyfriend, Daniel.

You're a doctor?

Go on. Knock him dead!

Pleased to meet you. I’ve heard so much about you.

Are you deaf or won't you answer?

I’m not a doctor. I’m an apprentice!

What year?

1st. I mean, I’m about to change into 2nd.

2nd year? You're not young. - Edmond!

What? I’m just inspecting a new recruit. Answer!

Sir, I’m not young,

but I’ve done lots of jobs to feed my family...

and pay for my license... studies.

I started when I was 12, so I’ve aged.

What jobs?

I drive a taxi... ambulance. Ambulance!

I got delayed at the clinic.

It lets me keep my hand in. Eye in the road, eye on the patient.

2 things at once: you make mistakes!

Excuse me, sir, but I disagree. Just look at you.

Oh? What do you mean?

I see a lot of decorations there...

proving you've had a successful career.

Then I see Lilly: pretty, intelligent, well-educated.

You clearly managed to do 2 things at once.

I drove an ambulance, too, in '59 in Algeria.

Eye on the road, eye on the machine gun!

See to the injured later. If they're still alive!

I’d like to see my roast beef!

Affirmative! I’m starving! Forward!

Now, the endurance test: 3 hours of war stories!

I’ll slip into neutral and cruise through!

I hurt you? - Not at all.

Good. I heard your hip crack.

It’s mine! - Let's stop.

I’m fine!

I don't want to hurt you, but I’ll be OK.

I’m OK now.

I could've massaged it for you. But if you're OK. Fine!

The surface pain's gone...

but deep down, there's a nagging pain, a stiffness.

Maybe a little massage would ease it.

OK, guys, a match to finish, for 5 minutes. Bow!

Change partners? - No.

I really don't want to hurt you.

I’m touched by your concern, Emilien.

Now I warn you, I started, aged 4. I can teach you a thing or two!

Your smile could melt a radiator! You put me off!

Real opponents don't smile! It’s not fair!

Listen up, you sumos!

Meeting with the boss in 5 minutes!

What's up? You lost your lenses?

I can see you well enough to kick your ass!

Just trying to help!

You done much judo? - No.

Only a couple of times. It’s not my sport.

So, what is? - Karate. Far more effective!

Mine's ping-pong. No good in fights, same principle:

Spirit of Rising Sun!

Kon-ichi-wa!

It’s easy.

"Con". "Consummate idiot" like Emilien!

Thanks!

Then, "ninny" like...

Sorry, Pétra. It’s just an example.

And "a" as in "aaaa"! Kon-ichi-wa!