Kaka

Screw this.

Let's have some fun…

God!

Ugh!

Son of a bitch…

What do you want?!

Good morning, beautiful.

- You're up already? - Of course.

This is wide awake.

I was close!

Huh?

You are such a turn-off, I swear!

Got a bad itch, girl?

Sorry but normal people like us have needs.

- We need Vitamin C. - What Vitamin C?

Cock.

I think you should get out of bed

Too much of that will blind you.

Whatever!

What a bummer.

A little push up to glam up.

Hey, Babet.

Why do you have your tongue out in front of your phone?

Because my followers are tuning in.

There's so many of them.

By the way, I didn't get to arrange the table nicely.

Just move a few things, okay?

I'm about to start.

Kaka.

- Hello, Ma! - Let's eat.

Why are you here?

Are you off today?

My patient's still at 3cm.

I told her she can still walk around the mall.

She won't be in labor till a bit later.

Okay… 3cm?

That's not wide enough.

Like I said, I want it to be a little wider,

so the baby comes out in one push, right?

Where's your Lolita? Tell her to come down.

Oh, right.

Ma'am, can you bring out the juice for Lolita?

I forgot to bring it in. It's just over there.

Thank you!

Am I the help? Why am I the one holding this?

I'm sorry.

Shit! It's so good!

Lolita, time for breakfast!

Yes! It sure is!

The food's going to get cold.

This one's still hot.

So hot!

Lolita, I'm coming in.

Put it in!

Lolita, what are you doing? Are you okay?

I'm praying.

- What's this, then? - So good.

What's this?

What's that?

That's the uh… it came out…

- It was all the way in. - Alright.

Mom said to call you. Come on.

I'll be right down.

Right behind you.

Go, go!

- Hey! - What?

Come here, hurry!

- Good morning! - Good morning, Ma.

- Good morning, everyone. - Good morning, ma'am.

Geez, Lolita…

So that's why…

You should have told me.

What is it?

This is Kams…

She's my daughter.

And this is Kaka, my granddaughter.

Hello.

And Babet.

Come on, let's eat.

Lavet.

- You're Lavet Babet! I know you! - Well…

Alright. No fan sign, and no selfie please. I won't allow it.

How old are you?

I'm nineteen.

Not twenty, not twenty-one!

We have B-19, and it's a Bingo!

Fine! You win.

Give it to me. It's all mine.

Forty pesos!

We like betting when Lolita brings home a young catch.

Don't feel too bad.

I thought we were exclusive!

Answer me, Kiri Baby!

You have others?

You were playing games?

After everything I've done for this family?

I told you we're keeping it open, didn't I?

There, the door is open.

You may go.

Fine.

What a scoundrel.

He's got some nerve.

Where did you meet that one?

Nowhere in particular.

Met him at a rally down at the campus.

You'd better stop joining those rallies.

You're too old for those things.

As long as women are looked upon as second-class citizens,

we should never surrender the fight!

I agree.

I'm not scared of DPAs.

What's a DPA?

It grows big when it gets mad.

Deep Penetration Agent.

So how was he? Is he a winner?

Of course not.

Actually, I'm getting the short end of it.

Even at my age, the curse hasn't left me.

All I ever wanted was to be pleasured.

You shouldn't believe in those things.

Remember what Nora Aunor said? Miracles don't exist!

I think in your case, it's all in the mind.

The curse is real, you idiot.

Many generations have passed for the women of Bataan

and not one of us has ever been sexually satisfied.

No one's hit the prize.

Not a scientist, not an athlete, not a hero.

No one's gotten through the barrier. We have no winners.

We've always had to rely on ourselves.

As long as I keep my nails filed, I'm good to go.

You know what?

I believe that The One is just lurking nearby.

I don't care if he's short, tall, or dark…

The important thing is he doesn't leave me hanging.

I know that I'll find him one day.

The one who will break the spell.

The one who will break me apart.

Amen!

Taho!

Good morning, sunshine!

Good morning, Kaka! Would you like some taho?

No, mister. I'm okay. Thank you.

- Good morning, Kaka! - Taho!

Good morning, mister.

I got you!

You really know what I like!

Sweet, but bold.

Ready to fight for you!

Fight? We have no fighters in the family.

We're done with fighting.

Hey! Why so bitter?

Give that back.

You're too sensitive.

What I meant was… has anyone ever stayed and fight?

- Well… - We're all sick of it, Jorge.

What about us? We've been together since birth.

Friends are different from boyfriends.

We're not compatible.

But I know you'll never give up on me.

You bet.

I'll throw up but not your breasts.

"…but not surrender!"

Your breasts look like they're calling for a baby.

We should go.

Let's go, we're going to be late.

- Left? - Right.

Right. I said to go right.

You went left. I told you to go right!

Don't yell at me!

I panic!

Here, look at my hands.

The L-shape means left.

The right one… that's me.

Why are you pushing this?

What if you have an emergency?

And you need to drive somewhere? This is a life skill.

You need to learn it. It's important.

Besides, it feels different when you hold the power in your hands

to get to wherever you want,

to whomever you need to be with.

That's so deep.

I choked.

You're always joking around.

You know me, I just go with the flow.

Some things you just don't rush.

Rushing things is different from having a plan.

Don't worry, the universe always conspires

for me to get the best out of life.

I hope we manage to get to work, at least.

Tomorrow, let's work on your parallel parking.

I'll just hook up with a driver so he can give me free rides.

Wow, you must love drivers.

No, I love blowjobs. Damn!

Damn! You're wild.

But seriously, maybe the person you're looking for is just close by.

He's getting closer.

He's finally here.

I can see him.

God, he makes me so wet.

You're being so naughty.