Blue Denim

We're all going to miss Hector, Son.

Sure.

Only, why did you have to do it while I was in school?

You heard what the vet said. He was an old dog— old and suffering.

I know. It's just— You get up in the morning.

You got a dog.

You come home.

No dog.

For Pete's sake, you wanna say good-bye at least.

I was trying to spare you that good-bye.

- Sure. - Sure?

What does that mean, sure?

Sure. Good. You spared me.

Mother? Mother, where are you?

- In here, dear. - Oh.

Which purse with this dress?

This one?

Or this one?

The small one.

But, darling, don't chew gum in a semi-formal.

It creates an impression.

But Axel says it's good exercise for your teeth.

He says that if everybody exercised their teeth twice a day,

he wouldn't have any practice.

And if he didn't have any practice, we wouldn't be able to get married.

Oh, Mother...

wouldn't it be awful not to be able to marry Axel?

Oh, oh, oh...

Aw...

- I'm so happy. - (chuckles)

- Are you? - Terribly.

- Isn't it awful? - (chuckles)

What are you two bawling about?

- We're just happy. - Mm-hmm.

Oh.

Dad, what's the matter?

Nothing's the matter.

Oh, dear.

What does Mrs. Wilmaker do with the matches, eat them?

Mrs. Wilmaker didn't come today. Her husband's sick.

He's accident prone, and something fell on his head.

Lillian, run, get your father some matches.

And, dear, the gum.

All right.

Tell me.

Jessie...

the boy blames me about his dog.

It's just that you didn't tell him first.

You should have consulted him.

A good officer looks after his men.

But your not an officer anymore.

And Arthur isn't one of your men.

He's your son.

What's wrong with the boy, Jessie?

Why won't he talk to me?

When he was little, we got along fine.

He talked, I talked. We got along.

Now, if I so much as say hello, he hates me.

Oh, Malcolm, he doesn't hate you.

It's just a phase he's going through.

What does that mean, a phase?

Oh, I don't know. It's just something you say

about boys Arthur's age, and everybody's supposed to understand.

All I understand is a few weeks in an army camp wouldn't harm that young man.

Might shape him up a little.

Malcolm, he's still a boy.

All right, he's still a boy, but he hasn't got much time left.

Remember my sock I looked all over for last month?

Hector took it.

He had it in his bed.

My sock.

- (door closes) - You see?

Dad, Arthur was only three when he first got Hector.

Well, Lillian, don't just stand there. Light your father.

Oh, sure. Here, Dad.

Hold still.

- (bell rings) - (gasps)

- Lillian. - It's Axel!

- Who? - Axel Sorenson,

the boy she got engaged to last night.

- Oh, Axel. - And what's wrong with Axel?

Nothing's wrong with Axel. Answer the door!

- Darling. - Darling.

Why, you little rat.

Lillian! What a thing to say to Axel.

It isn't Axel, it's Ernie.

Good evening, Mrs. Bartley.

Good evening, Ernie.

- Major Bartley. - Ernie.

How are all the nuts at your hardware store, Major?

Not so good, Ernie. They bolted.

The, uh, nuts bolted.

How are you, Lillian?

At the moment, contaminated.

You shouldn't be rude to Ernie when you're all dressed up, dear.

That's all right, Mrs. Bartley.

I just say to myself, "Ernie, there's a girl with a tiny mind.

Have compassion."

Lame brain, your crutch is here.

Well, what are you two boys up to tonight, homework?

Oh, yes, sir.

Arthur's a little shaky in biology, so I thought I'd give him a workout.

What exactly is biology, Ernie?

Well, it's the, uh, study of, uh...

Well, you take this frog,

and you split it up the middle,

and you check the differences.

What differences?

Um, well, its sex, for one thing.

I see. Well, if that's biology,

I think it's very nice of Arthur to be shaky in it.

Yes, ma'am. - (bell rings)

- Oh, I'll get it. - Oh, no, you won't.

- Darling. - Oh. Mmm.

Hi, Doc.

- Oh, hi, there, small fry. - Hello, Axel.

Good evening, Mrs. Bartley.

- Axel, how are you tonight? - Fine, thanks, Major.

Congratulations, Doc. I hope you know what you're getting.

- Ernie. - I sure do.

Come on, honey. All set?

- Is it true that all dentists are sadists? - Of course not, Ernie.

Only with some of our patients.

Come up to the office sometime. I'll show you what I mean.

Hey, nice. Do your own work, Doc?

They'll all fall out before you're 40, anyway.

- Good night. Don't be late.

Good night, darling.

Good night, you rat.

It's wonderful to think those two are gonna get married.

Oh, Ernie, do you really think so?

Oh, yes, ma'am.

It's gonna save two other people.

- Oh, hi, Art. - Hi.

Listen, instead of homework tonight,

how would you two kids like to take in a movie with me, huh?

- Uh, well— - We'd love to, sir.

Only, uh, mid-semesters are coming up, and...

Well, I know. But just for one night.

Well, never mind.

I didn't know you were having trouble with your school work, Arthur.

- Well, I— - Oh, he isn't.

He's swell in English, straight A.

It's only biology.

Oh.

Straight A in English, huh? I didn't realize that.

Why didn't you tell me, Son?

Well, it doesn't mean anything.

It wouldn't get you very far in the army, but it shows you have an aptitude for...

Well, I don't know, something.

We'll talk about it sometime, huh?

Sure, Dad, anytime. You ready, Ernie?

- Right. Okay, Major? - (heels click)

Oh, no, Ernie.

Come on, now.

That's better.

Dismissed!

Private Bartley, fall in.

I'll see you later.

Don't work too hard.

How many damn cards you want?

Give me two.

You betting, Art?

Yeah.

Two blue ones.

Oh, yeah?

Tell you what I'm gonna do.

Gonna see that, and I'm gonna bump you two.

I'll have a look.

What do ya got?

Aces up, my boy.

Three sixes.

I had to keep you honest.

So that nutty old sister of yours has wrapped up Doc Sorenson.

Yep.

All along, he looked like a loser.

These days, it takes talent to learn how to slip and slide around.

Do you know at school, one out of six guys is going steady?

That so?

One out of six, trapped.

It's one thing for a guy to go way out.

But these guys ain't never gonna get back.

Not me.

Me neither.

Well, it's lucky in a way.

Take a girl like your sister.

Three red.

I'm out. What about my sister?

The way I see it, Sorenson probably saved her.

Saved her? From what?

It's a crummy world there.

Some old white slaver could have come along

and picked her off like a naked grape.

- Lillian? - Sure, Lillian.

It happens every day. Girls just disappear.

Yeah, but Lillian— (laughs)

Okay, split a gut.

But I could tell you stuff that would curl your teeth.

This town's full of it.

Gambling, dope, prostitution, smuggling,