Stan Against Evil

Sta-Stan?

Oh, Geez.

Stan.

Look, I'm, uh... I'm sorry about this,

but, uh... You understand.

*STAN AGAINST EVIL * Season 01 Episode 08 "Level Boss" Precisely Synchronized by srjanapala

Oh, my God.

Terrific.

Y'ello?

Yeah, hey, uh, Leon, I need you to come get me.

I, uh... I blew a tire.

I'm on county road 8. I think I'm just past the, uh...

Well, the...

The thing is I-I can't get over there right now.

I'm on a stakeout.

Oh, God. Is this that woman again?

I'm... I'm not at Liberty... - Okay, Leon,

listen to me... hiding in the bushes

outside the house of a woman that you went out with,

what, twice in high school does not constitute a stakeout!

Oh! Shh! Here she comes!

Ohh!

So, it's three kids now.

That's your move.

And the dance continues.

We now return to "Rattlers! Nature's Death Machine."

Since the dawn of time, man has wondered,

"what if my penis lived alone in the woods

and was poisonous?"

Amen, brother.

Jell-o.

Hey, Stan! Hey, you busy?

Evie, please don't do that with your voice.

If you want something, just go ahead and ask for it.

Okay, look... I-I blew a tyre, and...

For some reason, I don't have a spare.

That's 'cause I don't believe in them.

They're a sign of weakness.

In any case, make sure and hit me back

as soon as you get your situation all squared away.

No!...

Please stay on.

Don't hang up.

Keep your pants on for a second.

What, uh...

What is all this?

I am starting my own business.

I am gonna clean people's teeth right out of this house.

Don't, uh... don't you need to go to school

For something like that?

Yeah, you do if you want to be a dentist.

But I'm just gonna brush people's teeth really hard.

Evie, sit tight.

I'll be right there.

Oh, my God... thank you, thank you, thank you!

Uh, y-you will be back in your chair within an hour. I swear.

Oh, no, no. Think nothing of it.

There's... there's no rush when you're helping a friend.

In fact, I may be very well be out of the house all day.

Th-there are some times when I just want to get in the car

and drive and drive and drive

until everything I've done in my life is rendered meaningless.

And when I do step out of the vehicle,

I'm a... I'm a new man.

Did y... did you ever feel that way?

Thank you, seriously. I owe you.

Yeah.

What the hell?!

Okay.

What the...?

What?

Y'ello?

Yeah, uh, h-hey, Leon, uh... I need you to come get me.

Well, I can't get over there right now.

- I-I'm on a stakeout. - Stakeout.

Yeah.

Thanks anyway.

"...The woods and was poisonous?"

Amen, brother.

Jell-o.

Hey, Stan!

Listen, I-I blew a tyre and, uh, you know, no spare.

I'll be right there.

What's with you?

Didn't this...

Already happen?

What, me doing you favors and you saying weird shit?

Yeah, that... that seems vaguely familiar, yeah.

No, seriously, Stan, I...

You know what? Slow down.

Why, what are you gonna do, give me a speeding ticket?

I'm not even speeding.

Seriously, Stan, just slow down.

You know... stop the car, stop the car!

Oh, what the hell?

You all right?

Okay.

You're gonna be okay.

We can help you, okay?

I'm the sheriff.

Just tell me...

Jell-o.

Hey, Stan, I don't have time to explain.

I need you to come get me.

I'll be right there.

Stop the car!

Oh, what the hell?!

Don't move!

What the hell are you doing?

It's Wendy from "Peter Pan," for Christ's sake.

She got the nightgown, the big eyes, the...

She got the whole thing.

Who are you?

And why did you kill me last time,

And why was there a last time and a time before that?!

What the hell is going on?

He... he did not send you?

Who?

He is the one doing this.

He won't let me go.

Evie, can we please wrap this up?

- I'm talking! - Let's go!

You are Evie?

I'm afraid he wants you, too.

Who wants me?

- Come on! - Ah.

I should have stayed home and watched my snake show.

Hello? Ms. Livingston?

Yes. My name is Denise Miller.

I'm calling with a very special offer

from White Power Tooth Cleaning.

N-no, no. It's...

No, it's... it's white power tooth cleaning,

Not white power tooth clea...

No, that is a very terrible name.

Oh, for Christ sake... look at this.

Evie... a can of schlitz beer.

They don't even make this stuff anymore.

It's probably worth something.

Well, that's a museum piece right the...

Oh, I'm swimming in butter today.

We got another one.

It's gonna be a challenge, but we can...

We can drink it. Ooh!

That's what I've been looking for.

Winne... oh! It's got bees in it.

Well, you know, bees traditionally love schlitz,

But you know what to do to bees. You collapse the can.

Okay. Let's try this again.

Come on!

Should have stayed home.

Jesus, Evie.

Say, uh, Evie, can I ask you a personal question?

Exactly when would you like to talk about

that crazy chick you just killed?

Stan, look at that.

What in the hell does that say?

Aah! Oh, my God!

It's all for the best.

He was just slowin' you down.

Who are you?

I see you found my stick.

I hated parting with it, but clearly, you needed it.

It's gonna make it easier to deal with them.

Wait, you... you left this for me?

Oh, those two don't fight fair.

As it is...

We both stuck here.

Hello! Mrs. Modig?

Yes. We're taking a survey.

Would you rather have your teeth whitened

by "Mighty Whities," "fun n' gums,"

Or "good times in your mouth"?

What?

Go... What myself?

The time loop...

I mean, surely, you notice it by now.

I mean, somethin's supposed to happen today.

But it ain't gonna happen if you die.

Well...