Bob's Burgers

*BOB'S BURGERS* Season 08 Episode 14

Episode Title : "The Trouble with Doubles"

Look what I found in Mom and Dad's interesting-smelling closet.

Wait, what were you doing in our closet?

Bup, bup, bup! A box of old tapes, which I believe

includes a tape of a certain song

someone sang to a certain poop

- when she was little. - No! What?

I thought I destroyed that tape.

Your mom made a copy. She loved that song.

- Behold. - The legendary

Tina singing to her poop tape.

And after she sings to it, she flushes it and then cries.

Like a Viking funeral.

You know what? I think I might just go into the kitchen.

- Uh, anyone want any... crackers? - Hey! Geez, Tina.

That's, like, the most athletic you've ever been.

No one can see this. I'm a mature young woman now

who just flushes her poop, and that's that.

So I'm gonna swallow this.

It's not working.

Tina, get the tape out of your mouth.

Fine, then I'm gonna go hide this.

- Not in my room. - I'm back.

- How was PTA? - P-T-Great.

After the meeting, I had a nice talk

with Ruthanne Donahue, Patrick's mom.

I think he's in your grade, Gene.

Patrick Donahue. Good at math,

has a weird laugh. That's all I know.

So, Ruthanne and I were talking,

and she said, "We should do a double date sometime."

And I said, "Yeah." And she said, "How's tomorrow?"

And you said...

- no? Lin. - Yes.

It happened so fast.

She pulled out her calendar and everything.

You were supposed to say, "Let me get back to you"

and then never get back to her.

- So lie? - No, not lie.

Just say "no" but in a really indirect way.

Come on, Bob. We don't have any friends who are couples.

Think of how fun it would be

if we had best couple friends.

Wait, you want to go on one of those train things?

- Yeah. Double date. - Can't we just tell them

- we got sick or something? - Lie again?

- Tina, please. - Maybe we'll have fun

and this date'll surprise you.

Like when you think a guy is gonna murder you

and then he proposes.

Come on, Bob. Please?

- Uh, fine, I'll go. - All right!

Whoa. What is this?

Oh! Oh, yeah. This is a zombie movie from the early '80s.

A bunch of people get trapped in a Jewish deli.

It's called Again with the Living Dead.

Zombies in a deli? I'll have some of that on rye.

- Am I right? - I forgot I had this.

It's so good. And scary.

But it's also funny. I mean, in a really messed up way.

- Huh. - Oh, but it's not for kids.

Y-You guys should never watch it.

Till you're maybe 20.

Sure. Sure. Sure, sure.

Tonight! One night only.

Again with the Living Dead.

The scariest movie about a Jewish deli

- you'll ever see. - Top ten, at least.

Our parents leave at 7:00.

Movie starts at 7:05. Who's in?

Me. I'll bring an extra inhaler.

I might watch through my hands, but just 'cause I like my hands.

I'm in. I like a little shiver in my liver.

- Right, Jay Ju? Get over... - Ow! Zeke.

- Zeke, stop. - We want to come, too.

Aaah! That's my scary movie sound.

A-ooga! That's my "no, you didn't" sound.

Oh, and this isn't a free show, people.

The entrance fee is candy. Plus tax,

which is candy. Okay, scat.

And don't tell Tina. She'll get all babysitter on us.

- Hmm. - Hey, T.

- Hello. - Hey, what's going on?

We were just telling everyone how excited we are

to have you babysit for us tonight.

'Cause it's such a treat.

- Oh, thanks. - Yeah.

I mean... babysitting is a lot of responsibility,

but at the ripe old age of 13,

I think I've learned a few tricks. Watch this.

Hoh! Who's getting sleepy?

Me.

Oh, she's good.

Okay, kids.

We're going on a double date with our new couple friends.

Double couple trouble.

Don't come on too strong, Mom. You don't want to give them

the full Linda on the first date.

I'll be cool.

Ah! There, I got it out. I got it out.

- Oh, boy. - Bob, promise me

you'll try to have fun tonight.

Don't complain like you like to do.

W-What do you mean, "like I like to do"?

You know, you make your little noises and your faces.

Dad has resting "B" face.

Okay, Lin, fine. I promise I won't complain

if you don't say "this is fun" over and over again.

Saying something's fun doesn't make it fun.

Fine. Come on.

Let's go. Bye, bye, bye. Mwah.

- Stay out of my room. - You got it.

All right, I'm gonna go into Mom's room.

Gene, check the VCR and make sure it's hooked up.

- On it. - What are you guys doing?

Listen, I didn't want to say anything earlier

because I knew you'd be like...

"No, we can't invite people over

to watch that scary movie Dad told us not to watch."

What? No, we can't invite people over...

To watch that scary movie Dad told us not to watch.

- Uh-huh. - You guys, I can't let this happen.

I'm the babysitter, damn it.

Tina, when Dad said, "Don't watch the movie,"

what he really meant was, "Watch the movie."

I mean, he was practically winking.

I don't know.

Jimmy Jr. is already on his way over.

And he's gonna need someone to comfort him

- if he gets scared. - Huh.

Comfort Jimmy Jr. Okay, I'll allow it.

I mean, zombies are more sexy than scary, right?

I think everyone would agree with that.

Where are they?

They must not be here.

Uh, let's go home.

Stop being a negative noodle.

You just need to get used to the fact

that we're gonna have a good time.

Oh, God. There are people sitting

with a dog. Please don't let that be them.

Linda! Over here!

Oh, my God. It is.

Oh, hi, Ruthanne.

Bob, Linda, this is Nicholas.

- Hi. - Hi.

And this is Lars.

You brought your dog... to a restaurant.

Lars is my emotional support dog.

Yep. We bring him everywhere we go.

Everywhere. All the time. It's fine.

So, uh, should we get another chair?

No, no, no, no. Lars, scoot.

Sit here, Linda.

Aw, thanks for the seat, Lars.

Aw, he got scared.

Oh, don't pet his ears like that. He hates that.

Oh, my God! Oh, no! -Ooh!

Oh! Oh, oh, I'm stuck.

- I'm stuck. - Oh, God. Geez.

- Let me... let me help you. - So sorry about that.

- It's okay. - I was talking to Lars.

Oh. Uh, well, this is fun.

- I-I mean, uh, double date. Yay. - Yep.

I'm so glad we decided to share everything.

I hate when people order their own meals.

It's like, "Oh, you want to order what you like

and eat it all?" Selfish, right?

Are there any more shrimps? I didn't get any.

Remember we said we were gonna order two,

and then Ruthanne said

- we were just gonna order one? I... You know, just one.

- Yeah. - We just need one.

There's tons of the tomato salad

that Ruthanne was very excited about at one point.

I need something over here. I'm starving.

So, uh, Nicholas, Lars gives you emotional support?

Yes, that's right. He-he does.

What's your emotional... thing?

I mean, if you don't mind me asking?

My therapist says I have PTSD.

My other therapist says I don't.

But my psychic says I definitely do,

so that's two to one.

- Oh, were you... - I'm working through some trauma

from when I was in an a cappella group in college.

And...

And it was a cappella.

There wasn't any music. Ever.

- People hated us. - Huh.

And now we have Lars. And that's okay.

So, uh, what do you guys like to do for fun?

- Tennis, anyone? Ha! - I can't play sports.

- I have inverted arms. - Oh.

We do like to do escape rooms.

Have you ever done one of those?

What's an escape room?

You go to a place where you get locked in a room

that looks like a war bunker or a-a dungeon,