Spider-Man

You know, Parker, you're unpredictable.

This is not the direction I want us to go.

But I thought you lived this way.

No, I mean direction in life, Parker.

I don't want us to start dating.

Well what's wrong with us dating?

We study together all the time.

That's different.

That's because I need your help in science.

You're the only man I know

who can remember everything about protons

and neutrons and alpha rays and gamma rays.

I guess I simply glow on the subject of radiation.

I don't know why, it must be in my blood.

Precisely. You're a natural student.

But dinner with you would be a date

and dates are for boyfriends.

Please don't be offended, Parker.

But, Felicia, why can't you think of me as a boyfriend?

Spider sense, danger.

I have enough men asking me out

but a good tutor, that's hard to find.

Parker?

Peter?

He walked away from me.

Who does he think he is?

After being rejected all evening by Felicia,

it sure pulls through the old spirits

to finally get into a little action.

Now, who is that little creep?

Some mugger after my money?

Heck, if I could find any on me, I'd split it with him.

Well it shouldn't be too hard to keep him in sight.

- -Whoa!

I should have stuck with Felicia!

Web fluid, I love you.

If those explosions were accidental,

then I'm the Human Torch.

Aha, just as I thought.

They don't look like they're headed for night school.

It's not nice to rob jewelry stores in Mr. Spider-man's neighborhood.

Can you say, "I'm going to jail"?

He has the jewelry.

Who cares?

Let's get out of here!

Well if it isn't a meeting

of the diamond lovers of America.

It's Spider-man!

What? Spider-Man?

Where, where?

Oh, I just get so flustered when I meet a celebrity.

I just don't know what to say.

How about you just say goodbye?

I'm way ahead of you.

Stay still, will you?

Actually no.

- Get him!

It's three against one!

As far as I'm concerned,

that means you're outnumbered.

Good thing I remembered to set this up ahead of time.

I hate to use so much expensive webbing

on yo-yo's like them.

Too bad that little troll got away.

I wonder who he was.

Peter, these photos are terrific.

In all my years as editor,

I've never known a photographer as resourceful as you.

Oh thanks, Mr. Robertson.

I don't know how you get these shots.

Me neither.

You're always in just the right place

at just the right time.

Tell me, Parker.

What's your secret?

A good telephoto lens and a lot of luck I guess.

That so?

Sure there isn't something else

that you wanna tell us?

Well, I'd like to get my paycheck today,

if you don't mind.

Parker, you really tick me off.

I'll find out how a young squirt like you

gets those photos sooner or later.

Better make it later. Bye!

He's got no use for me,

he hates Spider-man.

I'll bet he can't even stand himself.

Although that would make sense.

Well what do you know?

The little creep.

Sorry, he almost spotted me last night.

I just ain't had any breaks tailing that Parker kid.

Gargan, you're worthless.

Ah gee, Mr. Jameson, don't call me names.

People have been making fun of me all my life.

Yeah.

I can see why.

Parker must know Spider-man.

That has to be how he gets those photos.

How hard could it be to follow him

to Spider-man's hideout?

So that's what old fuzz head is up to.

Is this a private party or can any wall crawler join?

Hey, what do you think you're doing?

I got a message for your pal, Parker.

Tell him if I catch him following me again,

snapping his little pictures,

I'm gonna do this to him

and that's if I'm in a good mood.

As for you, prune face, get off my case, you hear?

I'm warning you, Jameson.

Get off my case, or else.

Mr. Jameson.

Huh?

Yeah, I hear you.

Wonderful.

Til next time, kiddies.

That ought to throw flat top off the trail.

It won't happen again.

That spider freak making me look ridiculous.

People are always trying to make me look ridiculous.

You are ridiculous, Gargan.

But how would you like to get back at him

and make a real name for yourself?

Me, get back at Spider-man?

I'd kill for the chance.

Then you're on.

I've one trick up my sleeve

that will get that wall crawling wimp

out of my hair forever.

Give me the genetics lab at Empire State University.

I wanna talk to Professor Stillwell.

I made all the preparations.

So this is the neogenic recombinator.

Yes.

And this is the battle suit.

Beautiful, isn't it?

It ought to be considering what I paid for it.

All right, let's get going.

Doc, what are you doing to me?

I feel strange.

Easy, it's the radiation.

Radiation? Ain't that stuff dangerous?

Not for someone with your limited intelligence.

Gargan, this is what you said you wanted.

Don't chicken out on me now.

I ain't no chicken, Mr. Jameson.

I just gotta know what's going on.

Stop, stop!

Stillwell, what's wrong with him?

He'll be okay.

The neogenic recombinator is restructuring Gargan's DNA

to match the genetic code of a scorpion.

I chose to use a scorpion because it's a natural predator

of the spider, see?

It's working.

Spider-man will at last meet his match.

This is J3 Bravo.

I got a spider sighting.

Heading due south.

I copy that, J3 Bravo.

We finally found him, Mr. Jameson.

Oh, man, I've got three science papers due Friday,

I have to study all night for a big exam

and I'm still batting zero with Felicia.

Get ready, Scorpion.

I hear you.

If I didn't have web swinging to help me relax,

I'd be wound up tighter than…

Now what?

Who the heck are you?

A real hero, you freak!

This is a joke, right?

Whoa! This is not a joke.

If you wanna join the Fantastic Four,

you're in the wrong place.

Highly corrosive acid.

Why do I get the feeling he's not into male bonding?

Where'd he go?

Look, I'm stronger and faster than you.

Gotta get this creep away from these busy streets

before some innocent bystander gets hurt.

Hey, pal, let's go talk this over some place

where it's just you and me.

That's it, Gargan!

Don't let up, get him!

Who's doing this fight, me or you?

Who are you talking to?

Wouldn't you like to know?

Oh, my God!