Detour

I SEE THIS EXPERIENCE AS BEING BORN AGAIN.

BEING BORN AGAIN. BORN INTO THE WORLD, FROM THE

BORN INTO THE WORLD, FROM THE WORLD ITSELF.

BORN INTO THE WORLD, FROM THE WORLD ITSELF. AND I DON'T KNOW.

WORLD ITSELF. AND I DON'T KNOW. THERE'S JUST SOMETHING KIND OF

AND I DON'T KNOW. THERE'S JUST SOMETHING KIND OF BEAUTIFUL ABOUT THAT.

THERE'S JUST SOMETHING KIND OF BEAUTIFUL ABOUT THAT. NOT A RELIGIOUS THING -- I...

BEAUTIFUL ABOUT THAT. NOT A RELIGIOUS THING -- I... DON'T DIE.

NOT A RELIGIOUS THING -- I... DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE.

DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE.

DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE.

DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE.

DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE. DON'T DIE --

Okay...Okay...Okay.

Okay.

Fucking kidding me.

It's gonna work. It's gonna work.

It's gonna work. It's gonna work.

It's gonna work. It's gonna work. It's gonna work.

It's gonna work. It's gonna work.

RIGHT NOW. FUCK!

RIGHT NOW. FUCK!

Okay. Maybe this... MAYBE THIS IS SOME KIND OF A FUCKING JOKE, MAN.

MAYBE THIS IS SOME KIND OF A FUCKING JOKE, MAN. This can't possibly be

FUCKING JOKE, MAN. This can't possibly be happening.

This can't possibly be happening. Okay, maybe it's happening, but

happening. Okay, maybe it's happening, but it's -- It's not happening the

Okay, maybe it's happening, but it's -- It's not happening the way that I think it's happening.

it's -- It's not happening the way that I think it's happening. It's just -- It's not happening

way that I think it's happening. It's just -- It's not happening the way that I think it's

It's just -- It's not happening the way that I think it's happening.

YOU LOOK LIKE SHIT.

YOU LOOK LIKE SHIT.

Okay, I got to think this out. I took the morning. I skimmed through the marketing

I took the morning. I skimmed through the marketing research.

I skimmed through the marketing research. I was gonna go meet the client

research. I was gonna go meet the client for lunch.

I was gonna go meet the client for lunch. I was driving, got my car, I was

for lunch. I was driving, got my car, I was on the phone, was talking to

I was driving, got my car, I was on the phone, was talking to Terry.

on the phone, was talking to Terry. Was it raining?

Terry. Was it raining? I can't remember.

Was it raining? I can't remember. Jesus Christ.

OKAY, I'M RECORDING. SO, UM...

SO, UM... I'VE STARTED TALKING TO MYSELF,

SO, UM... I'VE STARTED TALKING TO MYSELF, WHICH I TAKE AS A BAD SIGN IN

I'VE STARTED TALKING TO MYSELF, WHICH I TAKE AS A BAD SIGN IN JUST ABOUT ANY SITUATION.

WHICH I TAKE AS A BAD SIGN IN JUST ABOUT ANY SITUATION. SO, I DECIDED THAT I'M GONNA

JUST ABOUT ANY SITUATION. SO, I DECIDED THAT I'M GONNA ADDRESS MY PHONE.

SO, I DECIDED THAT I'M GONNA ADDRESS MY PHONE. HELLO.

ADDRESS MY PHONE. HELLO. UH...I GUESS -- I GUESS I'M

HELLO. UH...I GUESS -- I GUESS I'M THINKING THAT A DISASTER LIKE

UH...I GUESS -- I GUESS I'M THINKING THAT A DISASTER LIKE THIS WOULD LEAD TO SOME KIND OF

THINKING THAT A DISASTER LIKE THIS WOULD LEAD TO SOME KIND OF A PUBLIC RESPONSE.

THIS WOULD LEAD TO SOME KIND OF A PUBLIC RESPONSE. I THINK IT WOULD HAVE TO.

A PUBLIC RESPONSE. I THINK IT WOULD HAVE TO. WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE QUESTION,

I THINK IT WOULD HAVE TO. WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE QUESTION, WHERE THE HELL IS EVERYONE?

WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE QUESTION, WHERE THE HELL IS EVERYONE? IT'S 15, 20 MINUTES TO CALL IT

WHERE THE HELL IS EVERYONE? IT'S 15, 20 MINUTES TO CALL IT IN, HALF AN HOUR TO DISPATCH.

IT'S 15, 20 MINUTES TO CALL IT IN, HALF AN HOUR TO DISPATCH. I MEAN, IT WOULDN'T EVEN TAKE

IN, HALF AN HOUR TO DISPATCH. I MEAN, IT WOULDN'T EVEN TAKE THAT LONG.

I MEAN, IT WOULDN'T EVEN TAKE THAT LONG. IT'S PROBABLY ONLY A COUPLE OF

THAT LONG. IT'S PROBABLY ONLY A COUPLE OF FEET OF DIRT.

IT'S PROBABLY ONLY A COUPLE OF FEET OF DIRT. ALL RIGHT, IT'S 1:48 IN THE

FEET OF DIRT. ALL RIGHT, IT'S 1:48 IN THE AFTERNOON.

ALL RIGHT, IT'S 1:48 IN THE AFTERNOON. I HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN DOWN HERE

AFTERNOON. I HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN DOWN HERE FOR AN HOUR -- I'M FINE.

I HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN DOWN HERE FOR AN HOUR -- I'M FINE. EVERYTHING'S FINE.

FOR AN HOUR -- I'M FINE. EVERYTHING'S FINE. I'M FINE.

EVERYTHING'S FINE. I'M FINE. YOU'RE FINE.

I'M FINE. YOU'RE FINE. EVERYBODY'S FINE.

YOU'RE FINE. EVERYBODY'S FINE.

EVERYBODY'S FINE. I JUST GOT TO WAIT -- JUST GOT

I JUST GOT TO WAIT -- JUST GOT TO WAIT.

I JUST GOT TO WAIT -- JUST GOT TO WAIT. NOTHING TO DO BUT WAIT.

YOU KNOW, MOTHER NATURE JUST CAME BY FOR A LITTLE, UNEXPECTED VISIT, SO...

CAME BY FOR A LITTLE, UNEXPECTED VISIT, SO... Fantastic.

VISIT, SO... Fantastic. HOW WOULD I SELL MUD, I WONDER.

Fantastic. HOW WOULD I SELL MUD, I WONDER. OH, MY GOD.

HOW WOULD I SELL MUD, I WONDER. OH, MY GOD. I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT I AM STUCK

OH, MY GOD. I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT I AM STUCK DOWN HERE, AND TERRY GOT TO GO

I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT I AM STUCK DOWN HERE, AND TERRY GOT TO GO TO THE MEETING, AND HE PROBABLY

DOWN HERE, AND TERRY GOT TO GO TO THE MEETING, AND HE PROBABLY FUCKED IT UP.

TO THE MEETING, AND HE PROBABLY FUCKED IT UP. I got to get out of here.

Okay, that can't be good.

YEP. YOU ARE SLOWLY TILTING TO THE

YEP. YOU ARE SLOWLY TILTING TO THE LEFT, AREN'T YOU?

OW! FUCKER.

WHERE ARE YOU?!

THAT'S 20. THAT'S 20% -- OR 21% OR... OR...

THAT'S 20% -- OR 21% OR... OR... OR SOMETHING.

OR... OR SOMETHING. AND THE...REST IS NITROGEN AND

OR SOMETHING. AND THE...REST IS NITROGEN AND TRACES OF OTHER SHIT, LIKE...

AND THE...REST IS NITROGEN AND TRACES OF OTHER SHIT, LIKE... HYDROGEN AND CARBON DIOXIDE.

TRACES OF OTHER SHIT, LIKE... HYDROGEN AND CARBON DIOXIDE. THAT'S WHY THEY SAY IT'S LIKE

HYDROGEN AND CARBON DIOXIDE. THAT'S WHY THEY SAY IT'S LIKE THE SILENT KILLER.

THAT'S WHY THEY SAY IT'S LIKE THE SILENT KILLER. IT'S THE CO2 THAT KILLS.

THE SILENT KILLER. IT'S THE CO2 THAT KILLS. I'M LIKE THE FUCKING BLOB.

IT'S THE CO2 THAT KILLS. I'M LIKE THE FUCKING BLOB. I'M LIKE THE FUCKING BLOB.

I'M LIKE THE FUCKING BLOB. I'M LIKE THE FUCKING BLOB. WHY CAN'T I BE LIKE

I'M LIKE THE FUCKING BLOB. WHY CAN'T I BE LIKE STEVE McQUEEN?

WHY CAN'T I BE LIKE STEVE McQUEEN? STEVE McQUEEN WOULD HAVE FOUND A

STEVE McQUEEN? STEVE McQUEEN WOULD HAVE FOUND A WAY OUT OF THIS BY NOW.

STEVE McQUEEN WOULD HAVE FOUND A WAY OUT OF THIS BY NOW. STEVE McQUEEN WOULD ALREADY BE

WAY OUT OF THIS BY NOW. STEVE McQUEEN WOULD ALREADY BE UP ON THE SURFACE, AT A BAR,

STEVE McQUEEN WOULD ALREADY BE UP ON THE SURFACE, AT A BAR, HAVING A DRINK AND A SMOKE AND A

UP ON THE SURFACE, AT A BAR, HAVING A DRINK AND A SMOKE AND A LAUGH.

HAVING A DRINK AND A SMOKE AND A LAUGH. I'M DOWN HERE STUCK, BECAUSE I

LAUGH. I'M DOWN HERE STUCK, BECAUSE I WANTED TO MOVE TO CALIFORNIA.

I'M DOWN HERE STUCK, BECAUSE I WANTED TO MOVE TO CALIFORNIA. FUCK.

WANTED TO MOVE TO CALIFORNIA. FUCK.

FUCK. WHY DID I MOVE TO CALIFORNIA --

WHY DID I MOVE TO CALIFORNIA -- WHERE THERE ARE MUDSLIDES,

WHY DID I MOVE TO CALIFORNIA -- WHERE THERE ARE MUDSLIDES, APPARENTLY?!

WHERE THERE ARE MUDSLIDES, APPARENTLY?! MUDSLIDES.

APPARENTLY?! MUDSLIDES. THERE ISN'T EVEN ANY FUCKING

MUDSLIDES. THERE ISN'T EVEN ANY FUCKING WATER IN CALIFORNIA, AND THERE

THERE ISN'T EVEN ANY FUCKING WATER IN CALIFORNIA, AND THERE ARE MUDSLIDES!

WATER IN CALIFORNIA, AND THERE ARE MUDSLIDES! OH, FUCK.

ARE MUDSLIDES! OH, FUCK. THERE'S NO WATER.

OH, FUCK. THERE'S NO WATER. IT'S A GODDAMN, GLORIFIED

THERE'S NO WATER. IT'S A GODDAMN, GLORIFIED DESERT, BUT WHEN THE WATER

IT'S A GODDAMN, GLORIFIED DESERT, BUT WHEN THE WATER COMES, HOLD ON TO YOUR ASS,

DESERT, BUT WHEN THE WATER COMES, HOLD ON TO YOUR ASS, EVERYBODY, 'CAUSE YOU'RE GONNA

COMES, HOLD ON TO YOUR ASS, EVERYBODY, 'CAUSE YOU'RE GONNA GET FUCKED IN IT!

EVERYBODY, 'CAUSE YOU'RE GONNA GET FUCKED IN IT! WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?!

GET FUCKED IN IT! WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?! YOU KNOW WHAT?

WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?! YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK YOU.

YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU, CALIFORNIA.

FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU, CALIFORNIA. FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKING

FUCK YOU, CALIFORNIA. FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKING RAISINS.

FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKING RAISINS. I MEAN, WHAT A STUPID AD

RAISINS. I MEAN, WHAT A STUPID AD CAMPAIGN THAT WAS, RIGHT?

I MEAN, WHAT A STUPID AD CAMPAIGN THAT WAS, RIGHT? OKAY.

CAMPAIGN THAT WAS, RIGHT? OKAY. I GOT TO CALM DOWN.

OKAY. I GOT TO CALM DOWN. I GOT TO CALM -- I GOT TO CALM

I GOT TO CALM DOWN. I GOT TO CALM -- I GOT TO CALM DOWN.

I GOT TO CALM -- I GOT TO CALM DOWN. I GOT ENOUGH AIR.

DOWN. I GOT ENOUGH AIR. I'M GONNA BE OKAY.

I GOT ENOUGH AIR. I'M GONNA BE OKAY. I JUST NEED TO CALM DOWN.

>> OKAY, COME HERE. >> WHAT? >> COME HERE.

>> WHAT? >> COME HERE. >> WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?

>> COME HERE. >> WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? >> LOOK, FILM THIS.

>> WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? >> LOOK, FILM THIS. IT'S RIGHT HERE.

>> LOOK, FILM THIS. IT'S RIGHT HERE. THIS. LOOK AT THIS MESS.

IT'S RIGHT HERE. THIS. LOOK AT THIS MESS. >> HOLY SHIT. WHAT IS THAT?

THIS. LOOK AT THIS MESS. >> HOLY SHIT. WHAT IS THAT? >> MR. DEL ACOSTA, AS YOU CAN

>> HOLY SHIT. WHAT IS THAT? >> MR. DEL ACOSTA, AS YOU CAN SEE, OUR YARD HAS BEEN DECIMATED

>> MR. DEL ACOSTA, AS YOU CAN SEE, OUR YARD HAS BEEN DECIMATED BY A PACK OF UNRULY COYOTES.

SEE, OUR YARD HAS BEEN DECIMATED BY A PACK OF UNRULY COYOTES. THEY COME DOWN FROM THE

BY A PACK OF UNRULY COYOTES. THEY COME DOWN FROM THE MOUNTAINS IN THE HOURS BEFORE

THEY COME DOWN FROM THE MOUNTAINS IN THE HOURS BEFORE DAWN AND DESTROY OUR HUMBLE YARD

MOUNTAINS IN THE HOURS BEFORE DAWN AND DESTROY OUR HUMBLE YARD THAT I'VE WORKED SO HARD TO

DAWN AND DESTROY OUR HUMBLE YARD THAT I'VE WORKED SO HARD TO CREATE.

THAT I'VE WORKED SO HARD TO CREATE. >> EXCUSE ME. SORRY.

CREATE. >> EXCUSE ME. SORRY. CAN I JUST -- CAN I ASK A

>> EXCUSE ME. SORRY. CAN I JUST -- CAN I ASK A QUESTION?

CAN I JUST -- CAN I ASK A QUESTION? WHY DON'T YOU JUST TALK TO HIM?

QUESTION? WHY DON'T YOU JUST TALK TO HIM? >> TALK TO WHO?

WHY DON'T YOU JUST TALK TO HIM? >> TALK TO WHO? >> OUR LANDLORD, DEL ACOSTA.

>> TALK TO WHO? >> OUR LANDLORD, DEL ACOSTA. >> I AM TALKING TO HIM.

>> OUR LANDLORD, DEL ACOSTA. >> I AM TALKING TO HIM. YOU'RE FILMING ME TALKING TO

>> I AM TALKING TO HIM. YOU'RE FILMING ME TALKING TO HIM.

YOU'RE FILMING ME TALKING TO HIM. >> I KNOW, BUT IT'S JUST -- IT'S

HIM. >> I KNOW, BUT IT'S JUST -- IT'S A LITTLE ANTAGONISTIC.

>> I KNOW, BUT IT'S JUST -- IT'S A LITTLE ANTAGONISTIC. DON'T YOU THINK?

A LITTLE ANTAGONISTIC. DON'T YOU THINK? >> I'M PROTECTING MY RIGHTS,

DON'T YOU THINK? >> I'M PROTECTING MY RIGHTS, JACKSON.

>> I'M PROTECTING MY RIGHTS, JACKSON. WE PAY RENT FOR THIS PLACE.

JACKSON. WE PAY RENT FOR THIS PLACE. >> UH-HUH.

WE PAY RENT FOR THIS PLACE. >> UH-HUH. >> I'LL PROBABLY JUST USE IT FOR

>> UH-HUH. >> I'LL PROBABLY JUST USE IT FOR MY SMALL-CLAIMS CLASS.

>> I'LL PROBABLY JUST USE IT FOR MY SMALL-CLAIMS CLASS. BUT STILL, IT'S IMPORTANT TO

MY SMALL-CLAIMS CLASS. BUT STILL, IT'S IMPORTANT TO DOCUMENT.

BUT STILL, IT'S IMPORTANT TO DOCUMENT. JUST COVERING MY ASS HERE.

DOCUMENT. JUST COVERING MY ASS HERE. >> I THOUGHT I WAS COVERING YOUR

JUST COVERING MY ASS HERE. >> I THOUGHT I WAS COVERING YOUR ASS.

>> I THOUGHT I WAS COVERING YOUR ASS. >> MY GOD. GIVE ME THAT.

ASS. >> MY GOD. GIVE ME THAT. >>

>> MY GOD. GIVE ME THAT. >> WHAT?

>> WHAT? STOP IT.

WHAT? STOP IT. >> SEE HOW THIS FEELS?

STOP IT. >> SEE HOW THIS FEELS? >> YEAH, IT FEELS PRETTY GOOD.

>> SEE HOW THIS FEELS? >> YEAH, IT FEELS PRETTY GOOD. >> FEELS -- OH, IT FEELS GOOD?

>> YEAH, IT FEELS PRETTY GOOD. >> FEELS -- OH, IT FEELS GOOD? >> YEAH.

>> FEELS -- OH, IT FEELS GOOD? >> YEAH. YOU WANT ME TO TRY?

>> YEAH. YOU WANT ME TO TRY? >> YEAH.

YOU WANT ME TO TRY? >> YEAH. >>

>> YEAH. >> MR. DEL ACOSTA -- WELL, YOU'RE

>> MR. DEL ACOSTA -- WELL, YOU'RE MOVING IN ON ME.

MR. DEL ACOSTA -- WELL, YOU'RE MOVING IN ON ME. YOU -- STOP IT.

MOVING IN ON ME. YOU -- STOP IT. >> THAT'S HOW IT FEELS.

YOU -- STOP IT. >> THAT'S HOW IT FEELS. >> YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN.

>> THAT'S HOW IT FEELS. >> YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN. I JUST -- I'M SAYING, I NEED TO

>> YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN. I JUST -- I'M SAYING, I NEED TO SEE MORE PASSION.