Claw

- Train will depart

in approximately three minutes.

The following...

No! (Crying)

Kevin.

Kevin!

Yeah?

What are you doing?

I've been doing some research,

hear me out here.

See this is what I think,

see how you can see the Empire State building there?

Do you notice how you can see all of those buildings

all the way in the distance?

You know up Madison Avenue there?

Yeah?

- Okay, well I feel like since I can see all

of those buildings, not just the Empire State building,

but like literally all of them all the way in the distance

from the sidewalk up,

there's only one conclusion I can make.

And that would be?

That the earth is flat.

Oh Jesus!

- I'm serious I mean there should be some sort of curvature

there, some drop-off.

It only makes sense, scientifically and...

Zip it.

Kevin, I don't care what you think,

where the Madison Avenue has a curve,

the buildings go sideways, flat, forwards, whatever,

the earth is round, it's always been round.

Check your information.

- Okay wait, look way down there in the distance,

the Freedom Tower, the former site of the Twin Towers.

Anyways, scientists have confirmed that no matter

where the sun was in the sky during the day,

the towers would never cast a shadow on each other,

it was just magical.

You know what?

Before you open up your mouth,

make sure you confirm with me the topic

of your conversation, okay?

I just...

It's not negotiable.

Can we get outta here?

And can we also find somebody else to hang out with?

Kevin is a complete basket-case,

I mean don't you know any like really cool hot

soho guys who would crash a party or something?

- Yeah, I'll get right on that, find hot gay guys.

Are you listening to me

or are you just whisking me away with your words?

Both.

What are you doing?

What?

- What are you doing? - What are you reading?

- This is an encyclopedia of the serial killers

of New York State.

- Oh God, what did I do to deserve this?

I'm hanging out with a reject

and the walking dead over here.

If I had any respect for you,

I would take offense to that, skank.

Skank? Skank?

I'm not the one whose mom named me Tiffani with an "I",

I mean shouldn't you be stripping somewhere

in maybe some black lingerie or...

Ella, drop it.

You're just lonely and horny.

Why don't you go hook up with Kevin over there?

You're both recently single.

Ewww, Kevin?

All right.

All right Kevin boy,

here we are.

It looks like you two with me this weekend,

and I'll tell you what we're not gonna do,

we're not gonna dick around here anymore,

so why don't you try to keep up.

Let's just get outta here.

Let's just get outta where?

- The city, just for a couple days.

Yes! And go where?

Upstate.

My friend gave me this good connect for an.

I-stay bed and breakfast house in Swamp Hollow.

Swamp Hollow?

No fucking way, that town keeps popping up in this book

all the time.

That place is ripe with murders and murderers.

Oh great choice, Kevin.

- I mean, I didn't know about all that,

just thought it would be fun for the three of us.

- I think it's a fun idea buddy 'ol pal.

I can't think of a better idea myself.

We'll go upstate for a few days,

explore all the sites of the famous murders and murderers,

it'll be a blast.

- (laughs) You make it sound so relaxing.

Come on, don't puss out on us.

- All right guys, the one thing I don't do is puss out.

Fine, let's do it.

Okay great.

Just hold on a second and let me call my friend

and set this up.

I'm excited!

- Listen, I'm all up for going to the country,

and maybe possibly seeing some really cute country boys.

But, do we have to take Kevin?

He's such a dweeb.

- All guys are gross most the time.

Yeah I know but...

- But, he is cute sometimes,

when he's not being annoying,

which is hardly ever.

Hardly.

- But, it does seem like he has a house connect

and if we don't offer him money,

he'll probably be too chicken shit to ask for it.

Free ride?

You bet your ass free ride.

- All right, but if he ruins things man,

we may as well just get our own ticket and go our own way,

seriously.

- Okay, we all good, we got the place.

Check-in is tonight.

- Perfect, let's try to make the train.

I had to start working on the itinerary.

So many murder sites to see, so little time.

- Ladies and gentlemen,

if you are not exiting at the next station

please move away from the doors and allow exiting customers

to leave the train quickly.

Thank you for your cooperation.

- Would you put that thing down for a second?

- Butcher Bill is one of the most notorious

of serial killers in the greater New York region

with a body count totaling over 35

that the authorities know of.

It's not that he killed that many

but the way in which he did so.

Most of Bills victims were missing men and women.

Runaways, hookers, you name it.

He would snatch 'em up off the street

then transport them to his barn compound

where he proceeded to torture and kill

with various pieces of farm equipment,

even parts of one victim were found inside freshly

made bales of hay.

Hookers in the hay?

And you call me a freak.

Now that guy sounds like a super freak,

he's super freaky.

- Okay, you two are a different level of freak,

and by the way, one is not better than the other, trust me.

- There are like three different murder sites alone

right in the neighborhood were we'll be staying,

including our friend Butcher Bill's barn.

We're definitely checking out all three sites

and taking selfies to document.

- Oh my God, what have I gotten myself into?

A weekend of this shit?

Did someone say selfie?

Selfie time, yes.

Our chariot awaits.

Oh my God,

- you have got to be... - be shitting me.

- Howdy city folk, how was the ride up?

In retrospect, luxurious.

- Well, she may not be much to look at,

but old Betsy here will get us where we need to go.

- What brings y'all all the way up to these parts

I mean, why would you come here?

- Well for one, we're bored out of our fucking minds,

but from the looks of this,

I honestly don't think this was the brightest idea.

- Actually, what my friend here is trying to say is

this town is filled with such a rich history.

We couldn't help but be drawn to experience it first-hand,

There's no place we'd rather be.

History?

I'm not aware of much of anything goin' on around here

to be makin' any kind of history.

Serial killers.

The history of serial killers.