White Girl

All right.

Stay right here.

I'll tell you when.

Slower. Back it up.

Keep going. A little bit more, like three feet.

Keep going. Keep going.

You niggas crazy.

- You got it? - Yeah, yeah.

- What the fuck is in this box? - Um, I think it's like kitchen stuff.

Like plates and pots and shit.

- You good? - Mm-hmm.

- You got it? - How many flights do we need?

Those dudes are still there.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

- Don't break the banister, dude. - I know, I know.

It kind of sucks that we're on the M line, honestly.

You know how long it's gonna fucking take me to get to work? It's gonna take me an hour.

I'm just glad we have our own rooms.

Yeah, but...

I'm going to miss snuggling with you.

We could still snuggle.

Yeah?

- I promise. - Good.

- Have you ever been jumped though? - I got jumped freshman year.

- You did? Are you serious? - Yeah. Yeah.

By whom?

- I was on my way to a show. - Yeah?

- Yep. - And?

This kid fucking asked me for a cigarette and then he jumped me for my skateboard.

- What a dick. - No, I'm serious. It wasn't even my board.

Did you not have a cigarette for him or something?

No, I had a cigarette and I gave him a cigarette. Then he followed me...

I don't know. I'd rather live in dorms than, live in a weird area like this.

Why?

I mean, it's kind of creepy, but like...

I mean, seriously, when I got off the train on my way...

Yeah, I think we're kind of out of weed, man. We're out.

- They have weed. - Who?

- What? - They have weed.

- So? - So, I'm going to go get some.

- No. - Yes.

No, Leah, really don't.

Um, yo.

Yo.

I was wondering if you guys knew where I could get some weed? Or something.

What, you think we're some drug dealers or something, Ma?

No.

I just thought you guys might be able to hook me up.

Nah, for real, Shorty.

You can't be coming around here asking strangers like that.

All right?

Are you serious?

Do I look serious?

Hey, Shorty.

Don't do drugs, all right?

Yo, she's tight, too, yo.

You straight stupid, my nigga. I can't stand you.

No, you wrong for that, son.

Hey. Leah, right? You busy?

- No. - Why not?

- Do you work here? - Yeah, yeah. I mean, I... just...

What are you... what are we paying you for, then?

Well, you're not paying me.

What? Guys, can I have your attention, please?

This young lady loves this magazine so much that she will work for free.

I'm just kidding. Hey, will you help me with something real quick?

- Yeah. - Yeah. It's all right.

You won't get in trouble, I promise.

- Okay. - Watch the pole. It's a killer.

Let me know what you think.

- What I think? - Yeah.

Well, I mean...

Very interesting. That is a very interesting answer.

I agree.

Oh, I'm sorry.

How rude of me.

Where are my manners? Would you like some?

Do another if you want.

Great.

Well...

there you go.

Uh, yeah?

- Messenger came. - Oh, great.

- What's this? - Uh...

that is Rambo.

You know Rambo... graffiti artist? He's painting now.

I bought, like, 10 of these, trying to drive the price up.

That reminds me. Can we do a little piece on Rambo? Try to drive the prices up?

- Good idea. - Do you know Leah?

- Hey, Leah. - Hi.

Yeah, she was gracing me with her art history knowledge.

Were you saying something about being more visceral than the street thing?

- We have a sponsor call in 15. - Uh, shit.

Can we move that to 3:00, please?

That would be very helpful. Thank you, Leah.

Bye.

Can I get three?

Thank you.

Thanks.

Hello.

Hi.

What's your name?

Leah.

I'm Blue.

- That's your real name? - Maybe.

Well, why do they call you that?

Because I'm always sad.

Before I met you.

Hey.

- Hi. - Hey, what's going on?

Can we talk for a second?

Sure.

Sorry. One second.

- What is he doing here? - I have to ask to invite someone over?

Leah, it's not anybody. It's the fucking dude who sits on the corner

- because he's probably a fucking drug dealer. - Of course he's a drug dealer.

And he's nice. Trust me.

My bag's out there with my camera.

They look nice.

They are nice. They put up with me.

So where are you from?

Oklahoma City.

The mountains and shit?

No. It's flat.

You can see forever and...

it's a city.

So why'd you leave?

What do you mean, why did I leave?

Is that your friends?

Yo, what's good, Ma? Come on, you going to front on us like that, for real?

Y'all having a party up there without us?

He just mad I got in the castle first.

Fuck that shit.

We gotta talk, man. Because you stupid. You acting mad dumb right about now.

What's good, beautiful? How you doing?

Oh, my God. Um...

What the fuck are you doing?

It's good, my nigga. Chilling, chilling.

Yo, ladies. Y'all have a nice place. Thank you for having us.

- Of course. - Real nice place. Real talk, yeah, yeah.

Oh, snap.

I'm Kilo.

Nice to meet you.

Katie.

Nice to properly meet you, Katie.

Shit, I haven't seen a dime bag since middle school.

- You guys got 'shrooms? - Nah. No, we ain't got that hippie shit.

We got that killer weed, man.

We got that shit that will have you going... word up.

Yo, yo, we got that yayo.

Yeah, I know you like that shit, right? We got that white girl.

For real, Ma, you won't need to be fucking with that shit, anyway. You heard?

Yeah, but I really like...

Drugs. She clearly really loves drugs.

You guys must like drugs, too.

No, we just spoke weed every day, all day.

- But you sell everything else. - Yeah, but that don't mean we like that shit.

How much you want, Ma?

You sell grams or what?

I got twenties, Ma. We got, yo, anything you need, Ma.

- We got that yayo. - So what are you waiting for? Hook me up.

Really?

- What the fuck you laughing at? - What the fuck?

What the fuck?

God, this nigga's always crying, yo.

Fuck, I don't get it, though. Because he still sells drugs.

Holy shit.

What?

You never seen a real woman before?

Yo. Yo.

Yo, son.

What the fuck is that, yo?

- You like it? - No.

I don't fuck with people that do that shit, all right?

All right.

It's been our spot forever, yo.

My roof is your spot?

You just can't fuck around right over there because neighbor's be tripping.

That one bitch... and I don't say bitch a lot, but...

that one bitch, specifically, comes out here bugging out.

Well, it's my roof now.

What's the matter? You ain't never learned how to share?

No.

What kind of girl do you think I am?

All right. Come back.

Hi.

- What's going on? - Nothing.

Can you pull up the guest list for me?

Sure.

All right. Can we take Jason McDonald off there? He's out of town.

And then, give Sophie Goodnight a plus 1

and then Cream should be in press. So move him over.

Move him over.

- You know how to do that? - Yep.

Okay. And you just deleted him.

All right. Well, it's all right. Just fix it and then at 5:00...

lock it up and print it out. And I'll see you there.

I don't think I'm going to make it.

How come?

Well, I just moved and I'm going to be unpacking.