10 Things I Hate About You

...On "10Things I hate About You!"...

What the hell are you doing here? And at 11:00 at night?

You're different from other girls.

You're really serious about this modeling stuff?

Modeling's my dream.

This whole time you've been telling me

this is about your principles,

you forgot to mention your principle drives a motorcycle.

You said yourself you don't even know this guy.

If I learn he's bad news, he's gone.

And now it's time

for our final pose-off in the male division,

where our models will compete

to see who rocks it in the same outfit.

This week, our outfit is the most unforgiving yet-

biker shorts.

Good luck, gentlemen.

Please take your places on the Poser platform.

Oh, my God.

They slathered so much baby oil on Trent B.,

he's going to slip and hurt himself. Huh?

And pose. I'm sorry, babe.

I- I just- I can't concentrate

with these cupcakes sitting right in front of me.

Uh-oh. Trent S. is doing that weird thing

with his foot again.

Still?

Even after Rachel ripped him a new one last week?

...final deliberation.

This is why I hate

former ballet dancers who try and model.

It just makes me furious.

I would never book Trent S.

He disgusts me. Trent S. is the light.

He sparkles. He has, uh, the model essence.

I would buy anything from him.

My complaint with Trent B.

is that there's absolutely nothing

paradoxal about him.

Well, I think that we have finally made our decision,

so let's bring the Trents out.

Joey, she's announcing the winner.

What's taking so long?

The male that has won this week's Biggest Poser,

and is guaranteed a spot on the final Pose Off, is...

Trent S.

Yes.

Aspiring models, please send in your audition tapes.

Let's see if you have what it takes.

I've got what it takes.

Hi. Oh, my God. You scared the bejesus out of me.

I missed you.

What are you-

What are you doing here?

Aren't you going to say hello?

Hello.

You've got to go now.

If my dad finds you here, he'll send me to convent,

and I have a real problem with organized religion.

If I'm really quiet, can I stay tonight? No way.

A, I'm not going to sleep with you

until we talk about sex and its implications,

and B, when and if we do do it,

it will be nowhere near my father.

You said "do do. "

Can I just crash here? I got kicked out.

What happened?

I wet the bed.

Patrick, seriously.

If you're going to keep talking all night,

I'll just sleep in the park.

No, stay.

If you were horrifically murdered, it would really ruin my day.

Thanks.

Which side do you want?

On the floor.

Okay.

But in the middle of the night,

if you decide you want me...

I'll be right here.

♪ Hey, hey ♪

♪ Hey, hey ♪

Translate By Mumy. Sync By YesCool.

Patrick.

What are you doing?

Patrick.

Patrick?

Oh, my God, this is so not cool.

Patrick?

Did I just eat this?

And 11 of its friends.

Oh, crap. I sleepwalk sometimes.

You don't say.

Go upstairs quietly. I'll clean this up.

Where are my cupcakes?

Don't look at me. You know how I feel about processed sugar.

Dad, did you eat the cupcakes I baked for the cheerleaders

again? Not this time.

And that time, I was going through a rough patch.

Celebrities were dropping like flies.

Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson on the same day.

This doesn't make any sense.

If you didn't eat my cupcakes, then who did?

Wasn't that overactive ass kissy blond boy here last night?

There's no way Joey would have eaten them.

He couldn't even stand to have them in the room, he was so tempted.

Well, it sure sounds like he could have eaten them.

Hey, is it cool if I borrow your car after school tomorrow?

I'll see you in class.

Later.

Kat, I don't have time to make out right now.

What's going on with you?

I come back from cleaning up your cupcake carnage, and you're gone.

Turns out your floor isn't that comfortable.

Patrick, this is serious.

You were sleep eating,

which, according to whatsthedealwithmaleness. com,

is brought on by stress.

That's fascinating.

Can I borrow your car or not?

Why do you need it? Where's your bike?

It's been confiscated. By your parents?

What happened? If you're in some kind of trouble, just tell me.

Okay, I'm in trouble.

What's going on?

What's going on is you won't stop asking me questions.

Ha ha ha!

Well, you're not borrowing my car now.

Thanks.

So I've decided on an angle

for my Biggest Poser audition tape.

Ready?

The all-American boy.

I'm going to be the studly football player,

and you ladies are going to be the smoking hot cheerleaders by my side.

What do you guys think? You in?

Of course we are, right, Chas?

Oh, sure.

I'll be sure to dial back my charisma so I don't steal your focus.

Thanks.

I'm super psyched.

Joey, did you by any chance eat my cupcakes last night?

No, why? Does it look like I did?

No. It's just that my cupcakes were missing this morning.

But if you say you didn't eat them-

Yo, I got a lawn.

I'll be right there.

Okay, I'll call you with the dates.

Did that seem weird? Whicpart?

Joey jogging like a Mexican jumping bean,

or that guy talking like he had no teeth?

No, Joey's reaction.

I think he secretly ate my cupcakes and then lied about it.

Chastity, what if Joey has some sort of eating disorder?

Oh, please. Joey's just weird.

You're overreacting.

Did you see that?

Hey, hey, Kat,

have you seen Patrick Verona?

No, why? Is that his package? No.

I saw his name on it. Why do you have it?

No reason.

He's getting his mail sent to my house.

It's supposed to be on the DL,

so please don't tell him I told you, or I'll have to home school,

and my mom's a drop-out.

Why would he do this? Do you know what's in here?

No, but it isn't ticking and nothing's seeping out,

so it's not a bomb or a severed head.

Something weird's going on.

I'm worried Patrick's in real trouble.

I wish we could just open this.

No. You can't do that.

Mail tampering's a felony.

Yeah, you're right.

A felony probably would look bad on a college app,

but we could follow him.

Follow Patrick Verona?

No way, no how, no, ma'am.

You've got a death wish. Be my guest.

Count me out, misses.

Okay. Then I guess I'll just have to ask Patrick myself

what's in the package that was sent to you

that nobody's supposed to know about.

So follow him?

Joey, Joey, he's our man.

If he can't pose it, no one can.

I'm Joey Donner, quarterback of the Padua High Penguins,

and I'm the next Biggest Poser.

Oh, no. Not the next biggest, the Biggest Poser.

Cut.

We've got to do it again. My abs still aren't popping.

Joey, we've already done it 17 times.

Your abs look amazing.

But they have to be astounding,

or Pixie Krotch will rip me to shreds.

Oh, my God. Joey doe.

I just read this article in Cosmo Girl about eating disorders,

and he's displaying all the signs.

No, that's what I was afraid of.