Scream Queens

Previously on Scream Queens...

I'm afraid you have kuru.

No one must know.

If the board finds out,

they'll think I'm unfit to run the hospital.

Massacres tend to happen in this hospital

on Halloween night.

You tried to kill me with punch?!

Bitch, just as soon as I get...

Help!

I could've swore I heard Chanel #5 scream.

How did you hear her from across the hospital?

She's drawn to Chanel #5's pain

like a shark to blood in the water.

She's developed a fine-tuned addiction to it.

Come on. Help me. Help me.

She's dead.

Oh, God, that's horrible.

Um, guys,

passing out...

If the killer can take out a special agent of the FBI,

are any of us safe?

The miracle is this didn't hit a vital organ.

Oh, my God, I'm passing out.

For the love of God, Number Five, Denise is dead!

Can you maybe let us all have two minutes that isn't about you?

We have to take this body and throw her in the swamp.

What?!

We can't just dump her in the swamp!

Denise was our friend!

I loved Denise as much as the rest of you,

which, admittedly, wasn't that much.

We just can't let her death have a...

negative impact on the work being done here.

I mean, if word got out that a FBI agent was killed here,

they would just shut us down!

And that means no patients.

And the life-saving research that we are doing here would end.

And we can't have that...

can we, Zayday?!

Even if I wanted to dump her in the swamp,

don't you think the Feds are gonna come looking for her?

But then I will tell whomever comes

that Denise just took off

on a secret mission for some...

top secret shadow

organization within the FBI.

Now, somebody get me a gurney.

Because Special Agent Denise Hemphill's going for a little swim.

Uh, guys? Guys?

Wait, really?

Guys!

Oh, my God.

Who could have done this?

We just need to find the guy dressed as Aaron Burr.

It's gonna be pretty hard to cover this up, Dean Munsch.

Girls... we have no choice, I have to call the authorities.

Go change out of your costumes.

No. Zayday.

I need you to help with something first.

Come with me.

Remind me when we're done here,

I must send someone up to help poor Chanel #5.

I told you, I'm not dumping Denise's body in the swamp.

Well, of course not.

- She's still alive. - What?

- When did you know she was alive? - When I took her pulse.

She had the faintest heartbeat.

I mean not enough to resuscitate her, of course.

She's basically brain-dead.

And you were still gonna throw her in the swamp?

No, no, no. That isn't an option.

What, with the kind of massacre that just occurred upstairs,

I can't be sure that they're not gonna dredge

or even drain the swamp during their investigation.

But rest assured, Denise did not die in vain.

She's going to be an integral part

of our little "save my life" research project.

Come, see-see it.

This...

is the secret cryogenic chamber

I had built with just a small portion of the Radwell fortune.

We're gonna put Denise in here and give this baby...

a little test drive just to make sure it works,

just in case my condition proves fatal

before we can find a cure.

This doesn't feel right.

Well... we could just take Denise upstairs

and hook her up to a feeding tube

and watch her as she slowly deteriorates.

Or we can put Denise in here, in the freezer,

until they find a cure for being electrocuted.

Zayday.

It's getting worse.

Please, Zayday, help me.

I don't want to end up in that tank like Denise.

It worked.

I peed out all the blue.

My butt is still really blue, though,

so I kind of look like a blonde baboon.

Mm.

I gave you a healthy dosage of deferasirox.

It's a chelation solution that sort of leeches out the...

heavy metals in the organs, and especially the skin,

and helps you pee 'em out.

Now, if you've noticed some...

silver in the fleshy part of your butt, it'll...

it'll normalize soon, I promise.

I'm sorry about the, uh, silver poisoning.

I mean, I have no idea who did that.

I mean, someone must have messed with my solution.

Could have been anyone, really.

They're all jealous of you.

It was probably Dean BoxMunsch.

I mean, she wanted to make sure her and her gray pubes

had you all to herself.

Well, first of all, she's rockin' a full Kojak down there.

And second, I really appreciate that everyone's rooting

for me and her to be the new power couple.

And third, the sex was exquisite.

I mean, the best I've had since I spent the weekend with Sean Young

right when she started her crazy phase.

Look, the only reason why I got busy with Munsch

is because I was bummed out that I lost the chance with you.

I don't know.

I mean, you guys are more age-appropriate.

You do realize you were, like, 30 when I was born, right?

Besides, I don't know if I can love anyone after what happened with Chad.

I mean... I need time.

Take all you need.

Not really.

I probably only need a couple hours.

I have, like, zero emotional object permanence.

It had finally happened.

The sword of Damocles had fallen.

I finally knew what it felt like

to be Freddy Krueger.

Because I, Cathy Munsch, was walking through a nightmare.

Dr. Munsch, what do you have to say about these murders?

I knew in that moment my dream had been shattered.

The C.U.R.E. Institute was dead,

and I wasn't far behind.

But one week later, something equally unexpected happened.

The hospital was thriving.

As it turns out, the old adage is true...

there is no such thing as bad press.

News reports of the murders

gave us hundreds of hours of free publicity.

And medical anomalies from all across the world

started coming out of the woodwork.

And they weren't worried about being knocked off by a serial killer.

Any risk was worth the miracle

of maybe having their horrible physical fates reversed.

- Excuse me, Dean Munsch. - Yes.

What, with the current influx of patients...

This bitch...

I hired Nurse Hoffel to make my job easier...

i.e. showing me how to run a hospital...

and now, this pill-popping battle axe thinks she's invaluable.

An expenditure like that should really be run past the board of directors.

I'll look into it.

The good news is that we were busy.

So many patients to meet.

Well, my name's Marguerite Honeywell.

I suffer from Marfan Syndrome.

Wow. That name is really kind of a mouthful.

Do you mind if I called you "Marfan"?

Um... yes, actually, I would.

Now, Daria,

it says here that you were diagnosed

with Moebius Syndrome in 2013.

- Is that right? - That's right.

I do online beauty tutorials,

and my total inability to move any part of my face

is really getting savaged in the comments section.

But there was one case that really intrigued me.

I must say that coming here today was not my decision,

but rather that of my employers at the United Nations.

Wait. You work at the United Nations?

That's really cool. I've always wanted to go there.

I worked in the diplomatic corps as an interpreter

for close to 20 years now.

And I'm the model of perfect health,

so I have no idea why I'm even here.

Wait. I'm sorry. Are you Swedish?

- I thought you were from the U.K. - No.

I'm from Minnesota originally.

Maybe that's what you are picking up on.

My husband says I sound like I'm straight out of the movie Fargo.

Wow. Inability to land a single accent.

It's fascinating.

Now, I did slip and fall a few weeks ago,

and I was taken to hospital,

but they said it was just a mild concussion,

and I was released that afternoon.

When-when you're talking,

are you aware of the way you talk sort of... shifting?

I speak the way I speak.

I don't know what you are getting at.

Can I just say...