Firebreather

It was the last day of the war between humans and

the giant monsters... Kaiju.

But to me, it's more than just history.

It's family history.

That's my mom.

They say her bravery saved the city that day, saved everything.

This is also the day my mom met my dad.

Oh, yeah... That's my dad.

Maybe I should skip.

Nothing says freak like coal for lunch.

You're not a freak, Duncan.

Get real, mom.

I eat coal.

And my skin?

You can call it pumpkin.

You can call it tangerine or... Or burnt Sienna, but let's face it... it's orange.

And "orange" you just adorable?

Ugh.

Duncan, this is a new school, not an execution.

Just try to socialize, make some friends.

- And... - And stop getting into fights.

But they're the ones who start it!

Jerks are instinctively drawn to me, like... Homing pigeons.

Duncan, you're a 16-year-old boy, like every other guy in your class, and

every kid in that school has problems of their own.

So, if you can just get along with people and keep your

temper, everything's going to be just fine.

Message received.

- And, Duncan... - I love you too, mom.

Actually, that time, it was "rock on."

Unh!

Uh-oh.

Wh...

Whoo! Whoo!

Yeah, Jenna!

What's going on?

Yeah, looking good.

Check out the new kid.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I thought there was some bird crap on my rear view mirror, but

now I can see it was just your face.

Yeah.

That's a good one.

Whoo!

This is going to be the best homecoming ever.

Bye, Jenna. See you later.

Ugh!

Hey!

You're so...

So...Hot.

Hmm?

I, uh... the coffee.

I meant this coffee is... is so hot.

Oh, I'm so sorry!

I ask them to brew my café con leche at 150 degrees so it's

still hot when I get here.

Diva, right?

Uh, how did it not burn you?

No, no, it feels good, actually.

I was freezing.

I don't know why they always have to blast the AC. In these schools, anyway.

It must be 80 degrees in here.

Oh, whatever.

I'm on the student council, so I'll see what I can do about

getting the heat turned on.

I wouldn't have pegged you for the student council type.

Student council, chairwoman of the homecoming committee... I'm that girl.

By the way, it's Jenna.

Ugh!

Oops.

I'd like to ask the whole class to give a warm welcome to

Duncan Xerxes Absalom Belphegor Gressil Uh, yeah, just

"Duncan" is fine, Ms. Dreakford.

Oh, all right.

Take a seat, Duncan.

Hey, Duncan, sit here with Kenny.

He doesn't have a lab partner.

Uh, thanks, Isabel.

Hi. Duncan.

Ken Rogers.

Kenny Rogers, huh?

Do you know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em?

No, not even a little.

Like reptiles and insects, amphibians are ectotherms and

cannot internally regulate their body temperature... what we used

to call "cold-blooded."

Why did we stop?

Did the amphibians object to being labeled "cold-blooded"?

No, Mrs. dreakford, this is so wrong for so many reasons.

Beyond the obvious animal-cruelty issues, students have a right...

Uh, Jen, that'll be enough.

No, a duty to refuse to do anything unbelievably gross.

That's quite enough.

Forcing us to mutilate these helpless innocent animals.

...Without offering a choice in the matter is clearly

an abuse of the authority of the school board... Jenna, just zip it.

...And a just plain bad example to set.

...In case, you know, some sick kids actually might enjoy cutting up frogs and

pulling out their guts.

Whoa!

Aah! Oh, no!

They're waterboarding Kermit!

Whoo! He's a jumper!

Look out!

Hey! Hey! Hey!

Uh... Whoa!

Ohh!

Aah!

What is that?

Are you done?

What is up with you?

You make Troy look mature.

Stop it!

Settle down, everyone.

I can't believe that jerk.

What a dork.

And I actually thought he was kind of cute until he did that.

Nicely done, man.

Just don't mention it, all right?

Bad joke... that's all.

Okay, Mr. Belphegor Gressil Pythius, what's your secret?

Hair gel, extra hold.

Ha! .

How come your name is like an a-list of mythological bad boys?

Care to explain?

Unconventional parents.

You really know your Cryptozoology.

Oh, yeah.

Isabel loves all that a creepy stuff.

She's a giant monster fangirl.

"Monster" is in the eye of the beholder.

They're Kaiju, Kenny.

Fine. Whatever.

Sorry.

They're not monsters.

They fight us because we keep trying to kill them.

16 years since Belloc was last seen, and we keep thinking the

Kaiju are a threat?

What's the matter?

Ugh!

What sphincters.

Shouldn't evolution have weeded those guys out of the gene pool

eons ago?

No, cockroaches have remained unchanged for millions

of years.

Well, you're clearly not a moron, so what was up with

the idiot dance back in class?

Did you like it?

I've got some notes.

But I liked the part where you hid something in your jacket.

You gonna show me?

Just keep it quiet.

No way!

Gomorradon... unreal!

It's kind of like a little tiny Kaiju.

It's a gomorradon, my dear Duncan.

These things live on Kaijus.

They scout, warn of danger, and live off the slime that forms

between their scales.

Sorry I asked.

What's it doing here, and how come you know all this?

I read books on this stuff all the time... small press.

Watch it.

- Whatever you do, don't... - Ow!

Let it go.

Unh!

Ugh!

Right here... this is the one.

This is definitely Jenna's locker.

Hye!

Ow!

You guys are morons.

Give me your library card.

And that's how it's done.

All right, ladies, line up.

I'm your new gym teacher.

You can call me coach Barnes or, once you come to love me, "blitz."

Hey, "blitz," I was wondering when I'd run into you.

Gym teacher?

That's your cover? Really?

You're coming down in the world since the last school.

The whole vice principal thing really cramped my style.

I could only yell at the kids.

Here I can get a lot more physical.

A heads up! Unh!

Yeah! That's right!

Two losers left.

Up yours, Troy!

Unh!

Time to take out the trash... the trailer trash.

You really are the king of the jerk wads.

It's good to be the king.

Enough!

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Hey, spread out!

No way.

Yeah!

Whoo!