Tea for Two

Hey, kids, get a load of me.

We give up. What is it?

I found it in my mother's trunk. This is what she used to wear.

On Halloween?

If you think this is creepy, wait till you see Richard.

Here comes Flaming Youth now.

Ta-da!

This is what my dad wore 20 years ago.

Well, if he looked like that, it's a wonder they didn't shoot him.

How could they wear clothes like that in the open?

You haven't seen anything yet.

May I have this dance?

Do it out, Lynne. - Go on, Richard, show them.

- Come on, Richard, come on. - Don't step on her toes.

Watch your hands. BOY 3: Go, Richard, go.

Stop.

Stop, stop, stop. Take off the record.

- What's the matter, Uncle Max? - I will tell you what's the matter.

What is it? - So easy it is to make fun of things.

Believe me, in this dress, beautiful your mother was.

I know, Uncle Max. We were just having some fun.

You are making fun from things you don't know about.

We know all about 1929. We've seen it in the movies.

The stock market crash, Prohibition.

Sure, that was when everybody drank whether they liked it or not.

You were there maybe, no?

No, but I know all about it.

Some things there are...

that even a man of the world like you wouldn't know.

- Like what, Uncle Max? - Like this:

No matter how bad things can look, always they could be worse maybe.

This I carry around so the same mistake never again I won't make.

- Oh, it's just a strip of paper. - Oh, but what a strip.

The first time this piece of paper I saw, the end of the world I thought it was.

Twenty-four, 23...

Eighteen...

seven and a half.

Minus 10. I'm wiped up.

How can this be?

Max, as your lawyer, I warned you this was going to happen.

Who could trust a lawyer?

As guardian of your niece's estate, you should have done as I told you.

You should have invested it all in government bonds.

What, and 2 and a half percent only I get for her?

Am I crazy?

I made a fortune today. I sold short.

Short, short, he says.

- Who did you sell to? - You.

Jeez, so now I am short.

- How can I tell Nanette? - Pick up the phone and call her.

Pick...

No. At her dancing lesson she is. I wouldn't disturb her.

- Why not? - It could be maybe her last dance.

Her uncle is taking care of her millions, she thinks.

Somebody should be taking care of her uncle.

I know that you know.

That I'll go where you go

I choose you, won't lose you

I wish you knew how much I long To hold you in my arms.

This time is my time T'will soon be goodbye time.

Then in the starlight, hold me tight.

With one more little kiss say nighty-night.

I know that you know.

That I'll go where you go.

I choose you, won't lose you

I wish you knew how much I long To hold you in my arms.

This time is my time T'will soon be goodbye time.

Then in the starlight, hold me tight.

With one more little kiss say nighty-night

- Well, how was I? - Swell.

- You had your back turned. - I always have eyes for you.

- Here, Nan, sit down. - Thank you.

With money left in New York, why knock yourself out this way?

Because I wanna get somewhere in the theater.

In plain words, I am stage-struck.

Well, I guess we're all hams underneath.

Right.

Did the crash catch you very badly, Nan?

Not me, I have a smart uncle. Mine's in government securities.

Know what I'd do if I had your dough? NANETTE: What?

Why not marry me and find out?

That's a tough way to get information.

No, you don't get it.

Tommy wants a rich but honest woman to take him away from all of this.

Somebody should. - Correct.

Take me to a cottage on the side of a hill...

Yes?

Where I can spend the rest of my days looking out over acres of cool, green money.

Well, Nanette Carter, this is a surprise. Fancy meeting you in a place like this.

- How did you know I was here? - Elementary.

Singing lessons Monday and Wednesday, dancing lessons Tuesday and Friday.

- You're a stickler for schedule. - Mm-hm.

You don't happen to be on it this afternoon.

Wait a minute, don't act that way.

I didn't wanna see you again until you paid back that loan.

All right, we had a little quarrel over dough.

Every time I call the house, I get the brushoff.

I've missed you, baby.

The flame's still burning.

There's a fire extinguisher on the wall. I've got to dress.

Just an act. The kid's really crazy about me.

Yeah, sticks out all over.

If Bee Darcy hears that rumor, you'll be sporting a mouse.

Don't worry, don't worry. I keep my women separated.

You sure do, in class.

If you'd spend more time rehearsing rather than giving advice and dancing lessons...

we might get somewhere.

Can't expect us to live on the money we loaned you.

There's been a crash, remember? Money's tight.

You have got to help me to get Nan interested in the show again.

Not a chance, that's your racket.

She's too swell a kid to be led to the slaughter.

Somebody's gotta come across.

Tell about the new numbers. Anything, get her up to the theater.

And have you put the bite on her? Not a chance.

It's a great show. She'll triple her money.

Triple her money? Maybe.

Look, she drops more than that every day at mahjongg.

Will you stop worrying about her?

Here's your coat. We've gotta get up to the theater.

Hey, now, wait a minute.

Why should I stay here and bring her to the theater?

What are you complaining about? Look at my date.

Ah-heh-heh-heh.

All right, everybody, take five. - How are you, gentlemen?

Look, Larry's trying to keep the scenery and the costumes on the cup.

- So what? - Gotta show them a couple of numbers.

- Is "Crazy Rhythm" in any kind of shape? - Well, as good a shape as I am.

Well, I guess that'll have to do.

All I'm asking is a little time, a little credit.

When this show opens, you'll get 100 percent on every dollar.

- I guarantee... - Mr. Blair, can I speak to you for a minute?

Not now, honey. I'm busy with these gentlemen, we're...

Uh...

Gentlemen, may I present Miss, uh...

Mabel Wiley. Mr. Blair promised me a part in the show.

But up to now, I'm just a pony.

- You're a what? - A pony.

- Theatrical lingo. A pony's a hoofer. - Oh.

Very attractive young lady, Blair.

I should think you could find her a part somewhere.

Sure, sure, I'll find something. Run along, honey, join your stable mates.

Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go, Tommy.

Ready at this end. Let's go, come on.

Just use your imagination.

Picture the gorgeous set Mr. Woltz is gonna give us.

Uh-huh.

- And Mr. Grover's sensational costumes. - Maybe.

Just see it in your mind, boys. It's terrific.

The lure of the jungle, the weird beating of the drums.

The madness of "Crazy Rhythm."

Crazy rhythm, here's the doorway

I'll go my way, you'll go your way.

Crazy rhythm From now on, we're through.

Here is where we have a showdown

I'm too high-hat, you're too low-down.

Crazy rhythm, here's goodbye to you.

They say that when a highbrow Meets a lowbrow.

Walking along Broadway.

Soon the highbrow, he has no brow.

Ain't it a shame? And you're to blame.

What's the use of Prohibition? You produce the same condition.

Crazy rhythm, I've gone crazy too

Great number, eh, boys? Got 10 more just like it.

- The show can't miss. - That remains to be seen.

It's sure-fire, my judgment never fails. Ask anybody, they'll tell you about me.

We have, and they have.

All right, so you asked the wrong people.

Would Nanette be on the way to toss money in my lap...

if she weren't sure it was a sokola?

- You mean the daughter of H.B. Carter? - I don't mean Little Red Riding Hood.

Do you know Miss Carter?

Know her? Why, we're engaged.

I didn't want the woman dabbling in show business...

but I'm a pushover for tears.

This is just a small part of the show. We've got a great opening.

Act one, curtain goes up.

Now, just imagine, I'm 40 beautiful girls.

All right, 30.

Oop. I'm sorry. I'm awfully sorry.

End of act one. Second act, completely different.

Curtain goes up.

All right, Blair, that's enough, that's enough.

I'm trying to give you an idea.

We'll talk it over, let you know on Monday.

- I'll see you later, Blair. - But you haven't seen the third act.

- Larry wants you to watch the rehearsal. - I'll watch my bankroll too.

Hello.

Nanette, darling.

Oh, I'm so glad you came over.

What kept you, darling? Up watching Uncle Max make another million?

- Who are the pallbearers? - Costumes, scenery, theater manager.

They want a piece of the show, but I'm saving that for the right party.

What took you so long, baby?

I had a little trouble convincing her she belonged up here.

I knew you couldn't stay sore at me once you'd seen me again.

- That's the old psychology. - That's the old malarkey.

- Nan came up to see a rehearsal. - Where do you get that Nan business?

What do you want me to call her? Lucille?

Miss Carter will do.