Norm of the North

Don't listen to the haters, Norm.

You're a polar bear. You got this.

I mean, look at those paws.

You're an animal... literally.

It's an all-you-can-eat seal buffet.

Go fill your plate.

- (GROWLING) - (BARKING)

Read 'em and weep, boys.

Cari-boo-yah! Full house.

I'd bet antlers he fails again.

Ah, he looks hungry.

I'm giving ten-to-one odds he catches the poor pinniped.

They say I can't hunt.

- Huh? - Huh? Oof!

Oy, phooey! How can I be king if I can't hunt?

Ooh-ooh!

Uh-uh-uh!

Oof!

Yaah!

This is gonna hurt.

Oh!

That wasn't so bad.

Oy, that was bad.

They say he doesn't have any focus.

Huh? Hi, Elizabeth.

Hi.

Augh!

Jeez, it's like pure ice up here.

An accident waiting to happen, you know?

I mean, somebody should really do something about this, huh?

Ahem. Lemmings.

Anyway, I really should get goin' now.

I've got a seal to go catch and eat and I...

anyway, I uh... See ya, gotta go.

Bye now. Catch ya later, Elizabeth.

Babe, look! A hunt!

This trip is finally payin' off.

Aah!

Any last words before I eat you?

Oh, come on. Don't say that.

You always know exactly what to say to get to me.

Eat him. Eat him!

- Yeah! Eat him. - Eat him!

You wanna know why I'm not gonna eat you?

You got a minute? Well, maybe an hour.

It all started when I turned 13.

In health class they told us how our growl would change,

how we'd start getting more fur on our bodies.

But they didn't say anything about speaking to humans.

I want one! I want one! I want one! I want one!

Aren't they supposed to stay 50 yards away?

If this little brat takes one more step, I'm gonna pounce.

- (SNARLING) - Keep it up, kid.

The only thing you're gonna get is a mauling.

Can't ya see we're wild animals here?

Did you just talk to me?

Wait. You can speak bear?

No, dummy, you're speaking human.

- (SNORES) I didn't know what to do.

No other bear seemed to be able to speak human.

And certainly no other bear had these weird feelings that I had.

So I went to go see the wisest bear in the world.

The King of the Arctic,

who conveniently was also my grandpa.

I don't know what to do. I didn't ask for this.

What is wrong with me?

Nothing is wrong with you, Norm. You're special.

Yeah, a real one of a kind.

Actually, more like two of a kind.

I share the same trait.

I, too, can speak to our human visitors.

You can talk to them, too?

I can.

Polar bears are icons of the Arctic, Norm.

And an icon with a voice can be very powerful indeed.

Our land is vulnerable and we're responsible.

For now, just know that what you and I have

is a great gift.

One day you'll truly understand.

But when will I understand?

But it didn't end there.

Human tendencies had taken over my body.

That's when I started doing the Arctic Shake.

I put the "soul" in winter solstice.

These days, I'm pretty glad I have these feelings,

but I just don't know what to do with them.

And that brings me to the other day.

Why don't you take a picture? It'll last longer.

I knew he wouldn't kill the seal.

- Pay up. - Fine, here.

You're lucky these things grow back.

I'm a bear who can't hunt. I'm softer than frozen yogurt.

Who needs a bear with too much care

and not enough scare?

Norm! What is that, a haiku?

What did Dad tell you about writing poetry?

I know, I know. "Leave the poetry to the panda bears."

What's up, Stan?

I only caught the tail end of it...

but I made some money off your failed hunt today, big bro.

I wish I'd caught the tail end of my hunt.

Let me give you some advice, bro.

Act with your stomach and not your heart.

- (SHIP'S HORN BLOWING) - Huh?

Oh, my 5:00 is here. Excuse me, Normie.

I don't know why you spend so much time and energy on these tourists.

They're ruining it up here.

Au contraire, mon frere.

As Dad always said, "If humans come to our land and clap,

they can't come to our land and crap."

"Give them a scene..."

"the Arctic stays clean."

Thanks, Stan, I got it. But Grandpa always said...

Enough about Grandpa, Norm.

He left us, remember?

He's not here. We are.

The humans won't destroy something they love.

And they love...

us!

Let's give these people what they came a thousand miles to see:

a show!

And go!

Whoa!

You ain't seen nothin' yet.

Whales, I need whales.

How many times do I have to tell you?

This ain't Orlando.

Act real.

Ohh! Not that real!

Aw, that's the fourth time this month.

Norm, I need you for the finale.

I'm desperate. A whale just ate my actor.

This is my nightmare.

Aww, please.

No, the Arctic Shake was for your bachelor party.

I'd never do that for the human tourists.

Never, never, never!

He doesn't belong in the Arctic, he belongs on Broadway.

- (TOURISTS LAUGH) Right?

Hey, hey, can you do the Charleston?

Socrates! O wisest of the winged,

brainiest of the beaked.

Caw! Norm, grab a seat.

Be with you in a minute. Just finishing up.

And the next thing you know, I'm twerking

in front of a boatload of human tourists.

Twerking! Have some self-respect, Norm.

I just don't know why everyone wants to be so nice to these intruders.