The Bad Guys: Haunted Heist

Long before The Bad Guys terrified the city,

hacking,

disguising,

lockpicking,

and fighting our way to the top of the crime world…

…there lived a maniacal, legendary, fiend of a crook.

His name was Reginald E. Scary,

and Scary loved loot more than anything in the whole wide world.

But Scary prized one item over all the rest.

One of the oldest pieces of loot in existence.

Empires were built on it, wars fought over it,

croissants shaped after it.

The Crescent Amulet.

Over time, he grew paranoid that somebody would steal from him,

the way he stole from others.

He locked himself in,

spending his final days cuddling, adoring,

obsessing over the amulet.

And he made one final vow before dying.

If anyone dared steal a single piece of his legendary loot,

he'd haunt them…

forever!

All right, guys, what do you think? It's the perfect Halloween heist.

You want to rob Reginald E. Scary's mansion?

Uh, no way.

This is just another one of your excuses to scare us,

like you always do on Halloween.

When have I ever done that?

Stealing a mummy's loot on Halloween.

Great idea, Wolf. Wolf?

I bet this thing is loaded with booty.

- Boo! -

Uh-uh! Don't say anything. We're far from done.

Ah. I love a pre-Halloween-heist latte.

- Eyeball?! -

Oh, I got you so good!

And then, there was last year.

- Careful! - Don't worry. I got this

There's no laser I can't dodge.

Ha-ha! Got it.

- -

Ha-ha! Gotcha!

Okay.

So, maybe I can't help myself sometimes. This year will be different, I promise.

No one's ever stolen from Reginald E. Scary's mansion,

so pulling it off on Halloween would show the whole crime world

that The Bad Guys aren't afraid of anything.

Wouldn't it be more fun to stick around here

and hand out broccoli to unsuspecting trick-or-treaters?

Oh, I love doing that.

They're all, "Thanks for the candy, mister…

Huh? Broccoli?"

And we're all, "Get out of here, shrimp!"

The amulet is some legendary loot,

but the stories, the lore…

What if the ghost of Reginald E. Scary shows up and causes trouble?

You can't punch a ghost! That's a scientific fact.

Oh, come on! You guys don't believe that stuff, do you?

I don't know.

Westside Wallabies tried to rob this place and were never seen again.

Rumors.

I bet they botched the heist

and used the legend to skip town and save face.

Guys, I know I've fooled around in the past,

but this loot is too legit for pranks.

You in?

It would be a primo steal.

The only thing better than a croissant is a big, old gem shaped like one.

I can play the role of someone who isn't scared.

Yeah, obviously, we're in.

- -

Uh, I-I'll stand lookout by the car,

w-while you search this very not scary, definitely not haunted mansion.

Aw, man!

But I'm already disguised as the lookout.

Guess we'll both have to do it. Bummer.

We don't need a lookout. Come on.

Now, Scary built this place as a fortress against thieves.

These gates aren't gonna open themselves--

Huh. L-Lucky gust of wind.

- -

- -

- - Ooh!

Scary used offset pins on the lock. Notoriously tough to crack.

But to a boxman like me, it's like dining on caviar.

- -

And no Wi-Fi. Not sure this heist needs a hacker.

…this heist needs a hacker.

Uh, is the creepy echo mocking me?

Is the creepy echo mocking me?

It's just an echo.

Then how come your voice isn't echoing?

…your voice… echoing.

Come on, we gotta find the crypt where legend says Scary died with the amulet.

Guys, it's a statue!

Ew!

Tidy up after yourselves, spiders!

Humans have the weirdest heads. I'll never get used to 'em.

Look at this. It's him.

The creep's eyes are following me.

It's an optical illusion.

Emphasis on "illusion."

Aha! Let there be light.

Not so spooky with the lights on.

Huh. Place could really use a dusting.

- - Haunted piano!

- I'm out. - This music… I can't take it!

It's not haunted. It's just a player piano.

You know, where you crank it up and it plays automatically?

Ha! Yeah, bro. Can't believe you got scared of that.

- - Hey, ghouls, take the big fish!

- There's more meat on him! - Hey!

It's worse than the music!

Nuh-uh. No.

The furnace must have turned on with the lights. See?

I thought we were The Bad Guys,

not the "scared by every little thing that goes bump in the night guys."

Let's focus.

If Scary really did hide his amulet in a crypt,

he probably hid the access to it as well.

That's what I'd do. I'd never pose in chiaroscuro. So tacky.

Wait a minute.

The portrait.

"My loot you'll never claim,

as hidden as my name."

Huh.

Reginald E. Scary…

Reginald E. Scary…

- The heck? - What is it?

Oh, sorry. I had a thought.

Got a little excited.

What if the "E" in the dude's name represented a musical note?

Maybe it's some secret key that will open the crypt.

I went deep undercover for that jazz heist, remember?

- I'll play something in E. Jazz heists. -

It's the loot you don't steal as much as the loot you do.

- -

This must be the way to the crypt.

Ha-ha. Funny, Wolf.

But you promised. No spooky pranks.

I'm not doing it.

It's moving on its own!

Uh, I've never met these intruders before!

I'm on your side.

Wait a minute.

Hey!

- My friend here dares you to battle him. - No, I don't!

Don't worry. Trust me. Just trust me. Do it.

I always knew this gig was a one-way ticket!

The thing was automated, just like the piano.

Huh. Just a bunch of gears.

It's like tech… without the tech.

- Props. - Of course!

Scary wasn't gonna leave his mansion unsecured after he died.

He left security measures in place

that make it seem like it's haunted.

The whole legend of Scary vowing to haunt whoever stole from him

was probably made up by Scary himself to spook future crooks from trying it.

I gotta admit, that's a top-tier con.

It's a smart play. Too bad we're more smarter-er.

Ha-ha. I said that wrong.

Nah, bro. It's "smarter-est." Duh!

- - This is it.

The inner sanctum of Scary's life of crime.

Incredible.

Wow.

The only thing in my inner sanctum is farts.

That was anticlimactic.

Let's hit the road.

That heist was epic!

I was all, "Take that, stupid axe knight!"

And you were all like, "Piranha, you're so brave and cool,