Noor (नूर)

There's an ancient quote by Buddha.'

The trouble is you think you've got the time.'

I often get these kind of quotes on whatsAppf

But they're way beyond my grasp,'

And the closest I ever came to Buddhism...'

...was a close friendship with 'Old Rum'.

And that friendship got too intense last night.'

We crossed all limits...'

...and what did I get in return.'

4000 extra calories, and a blockbuster hangover.'

That reminds me, my weight is greater than my followers on Twitter.'

Why does everything that star-ts out so amazingly...'

...end so badly?'

I hate my life.

Maltil!

Maltil!

I'm so dependent on Malti and have no idea what I'd do without her.'

And this is Dimpy.'

Who I call the son my dad never had."

And me? Sometimes I feel I'm his step-daughter.

This is my one-room-kitchen.'

I spend half of my life on Mumbai's roads.'

And my average commuting time is longer than the flight from Mumbai to Dubai.'

And turbulence? Full.'

In fact, even these potholes have become my friends.'

Thanks to them, I changed my tyres six times in the last one year...'

...which is expensive.'

Everything I own is bought on installments.'

And so I had to give up smoking.'

I can't afford it.'

I can't afford anything.'

In fact, my entire life is on installments now, which exceeds even my salary.'

I am Noor... Noor Roy Chaudhary.'

Journalist...or Joker!'

Journalist? Jo...!'

Frankly, sometimes I feel I am less of a journalist...'

...and more of a joker.'

But let's look on the bright side.'

It's still not too late.'

If I learn to take the right step at the right time'

...then I'm sure I'll reach exactly where I deserve to be.'

Most geniuses do.'

Today is my 28th binhday...another year gone.'

The world failed to discover me this year again.'

But next year... all this is going to change.'

The world of serious journalism...'

...is going to get their new Barkha.'

No more adult sites.'

This year you haven't got a chance...'

...because this year, I'm going to find myself a real man'

This year...I'll be turning over from 'Seedhi-Savitri'(Decent) to a 'Tedhi Savitri'.

I've got an odd habit...'

...I talk to myself a lot.'

Anywaymfirst work, then life.'

Always and every time.'

I am getting feelers from CNN.'

Who knows...maybe I'll get my dream job this monsoon.'

...however we regret to inform you...blah-blah...

Of course.

How can I do it without you?

Right.

Of course, baby. Of course.

Noor! - Yeah!

There was a time when every journalist...'

...wanted to grow up and be like Shekhar Das.'

He was never afraid of being inside the action.'

But...love changes everyone.'

Shekhar got married to Lavina...and bam...'

That was the end.'

That's the journey from 'risk' to 'lshq' (LOVE)'

Now there's just BBTT.'

Biwi (WIFE), Bacche (KIDS), Trips and TRPS.'

I've to go now, baby. Bye.

That's the world of Shekhar Das.'

There... - Where?

There...

Lunch with Lavina.

So... - Go.

Where? - Film City.

What? - Sunny Leone...interview.

Shekhar, even I have plans.

What plans...? You're a journalist. Now go.

The crew's already on their way.

You know, it's not even 11130...

...and already 17 people have died in the local trains.

And, what about the coastal road proposed by the government...

...that's ruining the livelihoods of the fishermen.

And the file on the Sewage Workers...

...which I kept on your table a month ago...it's still rotting there.

Film City...Sunny Leone... Now!

Shekhar, it's my birthday. - Happy birthday, Noor.

Now go.

Baby...

I'm not going to meet her... No! - Screw you!

I heard that!

And listen wear your black halter, not the red one.

Black makes you look...slim...

You know what I mean.

Did I mention that Levine's dad is the owner of a big news channel?'

And he gave Shekhar this news agency as dowry.'

And now this is the only job this news agency's got.'

Covering crappy stories for Shekhafis father-in-laws company.'

This is my screwed up life... and this is my screwed up boss.'

Junior correspondent at The Buzz.'

It's just a cool name, there's no buzz here.'

And my show, Mumbai believe it or not.'

It's the most pointless show in the world.'

Meaning...l am the most pointless journalist in this world.'

So this story will be perfect for my show.'

Did celebrated journalist Shekhar Das fall down the stairs of his own office?'

To post or not to post.'

ls Shekhar Das really fallen so low?'

In case you didn't notice, I've got a strange habit...'

I talk to myself.'

One for Goregoan, please.

The population of Mumbai is 225 million.'

Which comprises of 50% male and 50% female.'

Meaning there are around 100 million guys in this city.'

Yet, I am single.'

Its easier hiring a hitman to kill someone than finding a decent guy.'

Oh no...what if I die today?'

Noor Roy Chaudhary...'

Risking her life, while travelling between Churchgate to Goregaon in the rains...'

...falls from the train and dies.'

In the line of duty.'

That too, on her birthday.'

it will definitely make the headlines.'

Do you know why?'

Because Noor was on her way to interview...The Sunny Leone.'

So this is my life, and that's hers.'

That's fame, is it?'

Living in an ugly white box.'

At least she's got an umbrella, spot-boy, make-up man.'

What do I have?'

Rain...and these two goons.'

But seriously... what the hell am I doing here?'

Hi, Sunny. Thanks for joining us today.

Thanks for coming in, in spite of the rain.

And in spite of it being my birthday.

Ahh...happy binhday? - Thanks.

So Sunny...

Shekhar, who is this Noor Roy Chaudhary?

Get lost.

Yup, that's my birthday cake.'

No-no...this isn't my imagination.'

This is actually my cake, and my birthday party.'

I want to create safety awareness.

So you mean you never take this helmet off.

Well obviously, when I have to wash my hair.

Other than that...never? - never

Every house speaks volumes.'

But my house just weeps.'

Just like me, even my home's feelings got washed away in tears.'

I am Noor Roy Chaudhary..."

Reporting for Mumbai, Believe It or Not.

Hot.'

Even the geyser's not hot in this house.'

Hey birthday girl.

Oh God! Here comes Zara. The mother I never had.'

Noor, you look like fashion street just puked on Linking Road.'

Come on, get up. Whafre you wearing.

Nice to see you too.

Zara Patel. 1/3rd of me.'

For years, Zara's parents kept fighting...'

...like World Ward 3.'

So at a very young age, Zara decided...'

...that she wasn't going to listen to the world.'

She would make the world listen to her.'

And that's what I want.' Hashtag Lifegoals

Perfect.

This. - Please...

I am not going to wear some toddler's dress.

Excuse me, this is high fashion.

I bought this playsuit for you.

It's even called a 'Playsuif.

Its like, I am going on a picnic to Hanging Garden. With my lunch-box.

Shut up!

Wear it with black Pumps and red lipstick.

And who knows, maybe some hot dude will take you for an overnight picnic.

Hot dude?

Hah! Urban legend.

I'm not in the mood to go anywhere today.

Z... - Yeah.

Can't we stay at home and watch Game of Thrones?

Absolutely not!

It's your birthday.

The world will end sooner...

...than this geyser ever getting fixed.

No...hello...

Bye !

Noor, it's your birthday.

I am not going to let you sit here and feel sorry for yourself.

I hate my life!

Why do you crib so much, Noor?

Why do you always see problems?

You must learn to count your blessings too.

But there are problems, Z...

My peanut salary and my last two stories...

Yuck!

I want to get into issue-based broadcast journalism...