Vaniglia e cioccolato

You can do it, Pepe.

VANILLA AND CHOCOLATE

Liar ! That Stefania from the paper you're shagging came crying to me !

- It's your imagination ! - Don't touch me, I'm not mad !

Talk quietly or you'll wake the kids.

- You're the only one I love. - You liar !

- I'd never sleep with another woman. - You're a liar !

Keep your voice down. It's true !

Dear Andrea, curse of my life.

I've threatened before to leave but didn't do it.

Now, I'm leaving.

You know how slow yet strong-minded I am in making decisions.

I've weighed up your selfishness and lies in these years of marriage.

And your fears, your childishness.

I don't want to know how you'll cope without me,

seeing that you can't even open a can of beer on you own.

If you want to survive, you'll learn to fend for yourself,

our children and the house.

It won't be easy to pay the bills at the post office and the bank.

Or dealing with the tax forms and the daily shopping list.

From now on, look after the kids, the most complex thing we have.

How will you find the time and energy to do your favourite sports:

lying, betraying and not caring for your family.

You don't charm me anymore. You're a child that won't grow up.

When we got married, I was too young to realize that.

I'm in the same predicament as millions of women.

We're victims.

You can tell the kids I took a holiday in order to rest.

Don't come looking for me.

If you do, I'll return just to get the kids and leave you forever.

For the first time you're alone with responsibilities and the kids.

I hope you can all be of help to each other.

I'm going to my grandma's house to be alone and to think.

Penelope.

I don't believe it !

- Hello ? - It's me, don't hang up.

- I don't want to speak to you. - Wait, calm down !

- I just want to understand. - What ?

- You've never understood anything ! - I'll write you a letter then.

Fuck off !

Shit !

- They argued. - That's a surprise !

- What terrible parents we have ! - I can't stand them. I hate them.

We could kill them !

That's a thought. How ?

- I'll kill you first ! - Dad, we knew you were there !

- It was a joke. - A joke ? Swear !

- I swear on your life. - I'm dead then !

I'm going to the office.

Lucia, you have two hours to sort out the kitchen and make lunch.

- I don't want to eat. - Your brothers do.

Ask Priscilla, I'm not your slave.

What a cow to walk out on a Sunday !

- Don't be paranoid. - Listen, Daniele.

- Take the dog out and feed him. - Or else ?

Or else...

Or else I'll make sure you're sorry. This is an emergency.

I want a change of tune from today, got that ?

What the hell is his problem ?

- Professor Briganti ? - Who is it ?

- It's Penelope. Pepe ! - Penelope !

The Penelope whose man fought the Gods for his thirst of knowledge !

What are you doing in this hill-billy town ?

I'm sorry to bother you but I have no water or electricity.

- May I use your bathroom ? - Of course, come in !

Don't get lost in the rooms of the castle !

- Shall I make you a coffee ? - A double one.

With Neapolitan water, this one comes from Santa Lucia.

Otherwise the coffee tastes gross !

- Good morning. - Hi.

Hi, Andrea !

- Good morning, Rosati. - Hi, Andrea.

You got something for me ?

What's this ?

- This is what you wanted. - Done.

Good morning everyone.

I know, I'm late.

- That's alright with me. - Excuse me.

- You deal with this. - Alright.

Hi, Andrea.

What the hell did you say to my wife ?

Sorry, but I felt guilty. I felt sorry for her.

No, you just cleared your conscience.

There's nothing between us, at least on your part.

I'm just one of your many lays, I know that.

That's what you think.

The truth is that I love my wife and I can't live without her !

Come on, let's be friends. No hard feelings.

Fuck off !

Andrea, have you handed in your expenses receipts ?

They won't refund the car hire because the receipt's wrong !

Leave me alone, I'm in so much shit you can't imagine !

Irene !

- Hi, how are you ? - Fine.

Come in, Mom's in the living room.

Pepe, relax your arms. Let your fingers fly over the keys.

You have to anticipate the second eighth-note.

It's Chopin. You can't just play it any old way. Try again.

Mom, Mr. Ogioni's here.

- Greetings, madam. - How kind of you to come.

My daughter said you would give me a hand.

Even two, if I can, madam.

Pepe. Stop now. We have to talk, grown-up's stuff.

Go to your room or in the garden.

Sorry. We'll start again as soon as I've finished. Don't disappear.

That's my daughter. Her real name's Penelope.

- That's a nice name. - Aren't you going to say hello ?

Good morning.

My mother's got herself into a real mess.

She's already sold the farmhouse and the land.

If I hadn't stopped her, she would have sold this house too.

That's typical of women born into wealth.

They don't take into account the repercussions of their fortune.

Hi, how are you ? Did you sleep well ?

Piccarda !

Go back to sleep.

Why are you here ? Did you get lost ?

Come on, I'll take you back to the professor.

Professor !

Professor Briganti !

Little girl, the professor's over there.

Were you looking for me ?

I brought Piccarda back to you, she was in my garden.

Damn, Piccarda ! You know you mustn't stray !

I forgive you, Piccarda. Thanks, Pepe.

- Why did you call her that ? - It's from the Divine Comedy.

Piccarda Donati was a blessed women that Dante met in Paradise.

She was a distant relative of Dante. She became a nun.

- How old is she ? - Piccarda Donati ?

- No, the tortoise. - She's old, but not as old as me.

Why don't you get a cat ? Grandma says cats are playful.

- Tortoises aren't. - But I talk to my tortoise !

You see, she's doing that with her head

because she wants to be forgiven !

I forgive you, Piccarda !

I still have a block of flats and a house that I'm renting out.

Then there are my jewels.

And my Colombian emerald.

It's pure, with no carbon.

My husband gave it to me, blessed man !

He brought it back from South America. I'll go and get it.

Alright.

No, not here !

Dad !

Come here.

- Penelope ! - Dad !

My goodness, you're beautiful !

- You're here, at last. - You see ?

- When are we going on holiday ? - Soon.

- How are you, Mr. Pennigi ? - Not too bad, dear Mr. Ogioni.

- I'm keeping busy, and you ? - Not bad.

It's good to see you, but what brings you here ?

Business, your wife will explain everything.

Excuse me, I have to go. Kind regards to your mother, madam.

- With pleasure. - Have a good day.

- How did it go ? - There was traffic, the usual...

- Do you think I've put on weight ? - My darling, you're beautiful !

Dear diary, I found Piccarda in my garden again today.

And I took her back to the professor.

Then I saw a young man and my heart leapt.

But he didn't even notice me. What a pity, he was gorgeous !

I'd better not write anymore.

Otherwise I'd have to write about Mom and Mr. Ogioni.

You know what my mom would do to me if she found you, dear diary ?

I don't think she'd like my thoughts.

- Hello ? - Penelope, what have you done ?

- What is it, Mom ? - Andrea phoned. He's distraught !

I don't care.

- He can die as far as I care. - Do you realize what you're saying ?

You have responsibilities, three children, a family.

They're not only my responsibilities.

They're his too. Let him deal with them !

For the moment, I've decided to think about my life. May I ?

What's happening to you, Penelope ?

- Do you want me to come over ? - Mom, maybe you don't understand.

I want to be alone, okay ?

I think you're making a mistake.

You could be right, but at least this time it'll be my doing !

Mom, will you do me a big favour ? Stay out of my life.

Dad, wake up. It's seven o'clock !

Mozart !

Dad, take the dog out, get my breakfast ready and take me to school.

- Do you always wake up at this time ? - Yes.

- Good morning. - Good morning.

Bye, Daniele ! Bye, Luca !

Hurry up, we're late.

Don't drag my bag !

Come on !

Bye, dad.

- Bye, Luca. - Hi.

Hi, how are you ?

- Who's that ? Tell me. - If you give me my pocket money.

What's mom been teaching you ? Okay, I'll give it to you.

His name's Roberto Tradati.

He's got a moped and everyone calls him a "goody-goody" at school.

I didn't finish the essay. Can we do it today ?

Bye.

Dad, you have to fill in the menu.

- What ? - You have to choose my school dinner.

- Mom used to do it. - Let's hurry up.