Vacancy

Son of a bitch. What are you doing?

There's a goddamn raccoon in the middle of the road.

Jesus.

Well, better to kill us

than get a little roadkill on the car, huh?

Well, we're still alive.

I can tell by the pissy look that you're giving me.

This isn't the interstate.

There was a wreck. It was all backed up.

I took a shortcut.

To where?

Can you hear that?

Hear what?

I think the engine just made a noise.

Well, it's kind of late for a breakdown.

Should've stopped somewhere earlier.

Well, I popped some of those trucker pills.

I thought I could make it the whole way.

Where are we?

You were really dreaming over there earlier.

You were mumbling and jerking around.

I dreamt you were trying to kill me.

We were at my parents' anniversary party,

and my mother wouldn't stop talking.

You started screaming you couldn't take it anymore

and then you tried to strangle me.

Hey, at least you were dreaming about me, right?

That's kind of an improvement.

Shit.

Jesus.

Mm. You okay?

I... I keep telling you how stupid that is to do that.

You oughta just kinda...

bite into the apple like the rest of the world.

It hurts my teeth.

As bad as cutting your finger off?

It's not anything.

You want me to drive for a while?

No. I don't.

Why don't you just go ahead and go back to sleep?

Remember how Charlie used to dance around

even when there was no music playing...?

I'm tired, David.

See, I think that should be us just about there.

Why didn't you just stay on the interstate?

Heh. I don't know.

Guess I just wanted to make this

as miserable as possible, you know?

See just how big a bitch you'd be about it.

I-I just thought it would be faster, you know?

Shit.

Is that something?

Do you think they're closed?

Since 1957.

That's too bad,

'cause they got good gas prices.

Look, if you're too tired, I'll drive.

I-I told you, I'm fine.

Okay. See, that town there.

E-Elida.

You were asleep, but we went through there

about three hours ago.

Well, that should put us down here somewhere.

I mean, that's a town.

Downey. I mean, they would have a real gas station.

If that's really where we are.

I think that we're headed south.

I mean, eventually, we've got to hit a...

Oh, my God.

Sorry.

Oh, my God.

Sorry. It's okay.

You got to me right before I headed out.

I'm sorry.

I gotta warn you, though. The...

The gas price is a little steeper than the sign says.

Actually, we're just... We're having, uh,

some engine problems.

Yeah, he dodged a squirrel a few miles back.

It's a raccoon.

Yeah. And we're lost.

Well, she's lost. I actually know

exactly where we are. We're on our way to Downey.

He's trying to tell you it's the other way, David.

Yeah. Sorry, man.

It's okay. It's really easy to get

turned around out here without a map.

Downey's, like, 30 miles back, man.

Really?

Look, I'll tell you what. Um, pop the hood.

I'll check the engine and make sure you can get that far.

Really? Thanks. That would be great.

Great. Thank you so much.

Yeah, I went off the road there when I missed the raccoon.

I think I hit a low spot.

Yeah. Thanks, man.

Is he gonna fix it?

What do you think?

Well, the, uh... The fan blade's bent.

Rock must have hit it. Heh.

Yeah, she'll drive fine, just noisy.

That's all.

You might wanna have someone smarter than me

take a look at it when you get where you're going.

I'll do that. Thanks. So now, what do I owe you?

Oh, no, nothing. No, we're good.

Hell, I should pay you

for finally giving me something to do.

Now, um, do you need help getting back to Downey?

Yes. Well, actually,

i-if you could just point us towards the interstate,

that'd be great.

Oh.

Well, you don't want Downey, then.

Okay.

I'll tell you what you do. You take this road here, right?

And... And you follow it down

until you hit a grove of trees on your right.

You take that.

Keep going till you hit Westcliff.

It'll be a four-lane there.

Westcliff. Make a left on that,

and that'll take you where you need to be.

Okay.

Thank you. Perfect. Thanks a lot.

And you know what?

Man, I'd feel a lot better if you just took this.

Thanks for staying out so late and helping us.

Well...

you just bought yourself a 20-dollar sparkler, then.

Because every day's 4th of July's at Small's.

Owner makes me say that. Heh-heh!

Here you go.

Oh, my gosh. Thank you.

And drive careful.

Okay, thanks.

Guess I ought to buy you a box of those sparklers, huh?

So how far did he say this Westcliff place is?

He didn't.

And I can't even find it on the fucking map.

David.

What, did we hit something?

Fucking...

Yeah, probably another squirrel.

You know, i-it was a fucking raccoon.

Whatever. I mean, Jesus Christ,

why do you have...

Oh, what the hell?

Son of a bitch!

Son of a bitch.

So much for being able to drive it the whole way.

God. Perfect. No signal.

Damn it.

Can't a car run without a fan?

Evidently not.

Okay, give it a try for me, all right?

It's not gonna work.

Jesus Christ.

Would...?

Would you just give it a try for me, please, honey?

Goddamn it.

So how far back was the gas station?

I don't know.

About a mile?

Kind of a long walk in the middle of the night.

Yeah. I mean, I guess we could just sit here

and hope some idiots like us come along

and give us a hand, huh?

I didn't get us lost.

No. You...

You slept for 300 miles,

thanks to your Zoloft-Prozac cocktail.

Fuck!

Well...

at least we know there's someplace back there.

Oh, yeah, the guy that helped us so much before.

Well, you know,

you could get another sparkler, Amy.

Asshole.

Whatever you say.

Grow a penis.

Never see stars anymore.

At least not in L.A.

Kind of nice out here, really.

I bet Charlie would have liked it.

We should've brought him sometime.

We never went anywhere.

The job was always too important to leave.

Why do you do that? What?

Every time I mention his name, you take a shot at me.

Well, stop mentioning his name. See, I'm not like you.

I'd rather just kind of remember him

and deal with the pain.

Okay, you know what, David? Do what you want.

He said he was getting ready to close, remember?

Shit.

Look, let's just go back to the car.

You can sleep on the hood and stare up at the stars

you love so much.

Maybe they'll know where we can find the guy.