The Border Post (Karaula)

The Yugoslav People's Army was formed during

World War II by a communist leader Josip Broz Tito.

For 50 years, this army symbolised the unity

of multi-ethnic Yugoslavia.

All men aged between 18 and 27 had to serve

at least a year in one of its multi-ethnic units.

Featuring

In a Rajko Grlic film

BORDER POST

Hey, I'm an honest girl...

I know, no need to explain.

You can spot it from a mile away.

If you don't show up tonight, I'll send the MPs after you.

Yes, ma'am! Wow!

My only one, I love you so...

Thus ended yet another traditional encounter

between Youth and the Army, to mutual satisfaction.

Gimme a smoke.

C'mon, I can't count on you for absolutely anything.

What kind of a pal are you?

Where's your girl? Gone?

Instead of taking her to bed and giving her a teddy bear

before bedtime, you let her go. How does that look?

Do you know what the primary task

of each soldier in the Army is?

The peaceful sleep of the civilian population.

Lake Ohrid, 1987 The Yugoslav-Albanian border

Doc, I'm not at all satisfied with your dedication to duty.

You've got potential, but you're just plain lazy.

Come tomorrow you'll be a gynaecologist,

a cunt-meister, you need to practice 24/7.

She's right in front of you with cock in her eyes,

but you do nothing. - She didn't have cock in her eyes.

Yes, doc, she did.

I saw it, but man, you have to work the girl a bit,

give her the talk, and bullshit her.

Ask her 'bout her family, or her favourite book.

You know what my favourite book is? The Little Prince.

You can't imagine how much pussy I got

on account of that book. A beautiful book.

Wow! Teddy bears! And you say nothing.

A gentleman never tells.

Pasic. - No, it isn't.

Yes, it is. Listen.

Really. Motherfucker.

He's early today. Last one eats shit!

Paunovic, the young hope of Belgrade athletics holds

a huge advantage over the once legendary Siriscevic

from Split. Paunovic is in top shape

and we can see he will go on to win the race.

Like hell he will! - And what is Siriscevic doing now?

Did the Olympic Committee see this? - You fuck! - Hurdles.

After an unfair move bound to be sanctioned by the IOC,

Siriscevic takes an insignificant lead again,

but we hope justice...

Fucking hell! - C'mon. - And the boot? - Fuck it.

Attention! Salute to the right!

Comrade Lieutenant, all present and accounted for.

Paunovic, why aren't you wearing your boots?

Being washed, comrade lieutenant.

You've taken your boots to be washed?

No, comrade lieutenant, the laundry told me

they don't do boots, so I had to wash them myself.

Your boots!? - Yes, Comrade Lieutenant.

With soap and hot water, Sir.

Are you fucking with me, Paunovic?

I am not fucking with you, Comrade Lieutenant. - You are!

Listen, you might have spent

years fucking those Belgrade doctors

with your story about being mad, but not me.

Not me. I'll fuck your aunt in the spleen.

Asshole!

Yes, Comrade Lieutenant!

Comrade Lieutenant, all present and accounted for.

Forget the spam, let's go.

Eagle two, patrol check, over. - Copy that. - Squad leader!

This morning a scientific conference opened in Titograd,

entitled 'After Tito: Tito'.

Participants include distinguished scientists

and Academy members from all socialist republics...

Thanks, man. - Workers from the Tito Industrial

Plant in Skopje visited the birthplace of Comrade Tito,

the greatest son of our Nation and nationalities...

...Slobodan Milosevic from the Serbian Communist Party

to visit Kosovo... - Bravo, man!

I know if I lived for a thousand years,

my whole life would fit in a day...

I know if I lived for a thousand years...

Doctor, Pasic needs you!

He'll fuck you in the ass!

Oh, no, he prefers when I suck his dick.

Yes.

Comrade Lieutenant, reporting for duty, sir!

How about a drink, Siriscevic? - No, thank you.

We don't have to be so formal.

No, it's just too early for me. - Fine.

Lock the door. - You want me to lock the door?

The situation is fucked up and I need a man

I can trust completely. I need your communist word of honour

that nothing said in this room...

Excuse me, Sir, I'm not in the Communist Party.

You're not? - No. - Why did I think you were in the Party?

All right then. Are you a man I can trust?

Well, it depends. - On what? Are you or are you not?

It depends on how dangerous it is.

I mean, I don't really want to get killed.

It's not dangerous. All you have to do is keep quiet.

Do you know how to keep quiet? - I do. I do. - Sit down.

What you're about to see, you never saw it, alright?

Don't be afraid! - I don't get it.

Easy, easy. Take a look at this.

What is this? - I don't fucking know, you're the doctor,

you tell me.

I should wash my hands. - Fuck your hands.

Does it hurt? - A bit.

Syphilis, Comrade Lieutenant. - Syphilis?

For real? - For real.

Fucking hell!

Have you had contacts with...

I mean... a person of

suspicious sexual habits in the past two or three weeks?

Pussies! - More than one? - No, no, I mean my friends,

all of them pussies, they laughed when I went off

with that whore. - When did you notice this?

This morning. - Have you seen a doctor yet?

I went in there and I came out.

And? Did a doctor examine you? - No. Shit, I got scared.

It's not easy, Siriscevic. I went in, and they asked

'Where's your file'.

As soon as I heard 'file', I froze. I don't want this

to be on my file. I'm about to be transferred out of here!

But, it's a medical file, not a personnel file.

Yeah, right. It all ends up in the same place.

And are you sure it's not this new thing

the papers are writing about? - AIDS? - Yes. - No, it isn't.

You'll treat it! - Hold on, it doesn't work that way.

How long does it take? To get rid of it?

For syphilis, it's at least three weeks.

You need to do it for me, man.

I can't face my wife with this!

Attention!

Comrades!

The situation is becoming unexpectedly complicated.

The Albanians are lining up their troops on our border.

Again!? - Paunovic, you wanted to say something?

Nothing, sorry, sir. - No, go ahead, say it.

If it's important, we should all hear it.

Sir, those Albanians just don't know

how to live like normal people, to have fun,

go to the movies, chase girls... whatever.

All they do is line up!

I've really had it with their fucking lining up!

Sit down.

Comrades, I would also like to chase girls like Paunovic,

but the Albanian machine-guns out there have us in their

sight 24 hours a day. You know that the enemy never sleeps,

and we won't either.

For as long as this continues no one leaves the border post.

All leaves and weekend passes

granted earlier are hereby cancelled.

Sir, my leave starts today, a train to Zagreb leaves tonight

Since you're still here, you're not going anywhere!

Any other questions? - And this is for how long, sir?

Until further notice. - Roughly?

The information available to me indicates that this

will be no less than three weeks. - Shit!

Three weeks! - Silence!

If it makes things any easier-

whatever goes for you, goes for me too.

I can't leave the post for the next 21 days either.

The only thing I did was to send Siriscevic

to get us the medical supplies we need.

Prepare for full combat activity.

This post is going to be a fortress

that our enemy will choke on.

Attention!

Comrade Colonel, Sir. Everything is in order, Sir.

Stop! You, you're crushing my petunias... Stop!

For God's sake! Fuck you! Plants produce oxygen for us.

If there were no plants, we'd have no air to breathe.

Every time a plant is destroyed,

it's a crime against humanity. Get it?

That's it, it's gone.

Fucking hell.

Hey! Cut it out!

At least, close the window!

Fuck him. There's nothing about it on the fucking news.

About what? - About the Albanians lining up.

As if they'd put something like this on the news.

You've no idea how many things like this have happened

and people had no idea. -So how come that you know about them?

Guys, I'll get screwed over this.

Why bother explaining it to him?

I want to. People know things happen,

but the army never talks about it,

not to upset the people.

Don't bullshit me. - You're full of shit!

We've been roaming this mountain like wolves

for the past ten months and has anyone seen anything?

Exactly. - Has anyone ever seen a single Albanian?