House of Guinness

Okay, boys. It sounds like a grand affair in there.

Now let's show them our invitations.

Arthur, we should get out of here. Come on.

Arthur.

- Come on. - For Christ's sake! Patrick!

- Come on! - Why are we leaving?

- Hurry up! Come on, follow me! - For Christ's sake! What's the matter?

- Come on! - I don't understand! Patrick! Stop!

Stop right now! Tell me! Why are we in such a hurry?

There's coppers coming, Arthur, at precisely one minute past ten o'clock.

Come here, ya filthy bastard!

Run, Arthur!

Come back here!

Down there!

There's two of them!

Come on, that way!

Shh! Shut the fuck up!

Down there. Come on!

Over there!

Down that alley! Down there!

Someone paid you.

Who?

You don't have to tell me.

No, I can fucking guess.

Did he call me a liffey eel, by any chance?

You did this for money?

- No. No. - You did.

- Arthur, stop it. - Did you think to just ask?

Open your mouth.

Open your fucking mouth!

Arthur… stop it.

Fuck.

Fuck.

The man who has your name is Henry grattan, yes?

He said he knew… he knew my sins.

He said he was gonna tell my father, Arthur.

He said he was gonna tell my father.

- It's okay. Shh… - he was gonna tell my father.

It's okay.

I understand.

It's okay.

You must walk away from anyone with this cursed name.

There is nothing but bleakness and blackness

will come from any connection.

But… but I saved you, Arthur.

No, no, no, no, no.

You must cut the ropes.

Run and wait for a check in the post for your services.

No. Please, no. Arthur, please!

What we have is not a service.

What we have?

We guinnesses give generously to the poor.

We give generously to the poor, but we do not forgive.

Please, arth...

as my uncle Henry will soon learn,

I am a wild enemy to have.

- Go away. - Arthur…

Arthur. But...

Have you heard of Phil the fluter of the town of ballymuck?

Times were going hard with him in fact, the man was broke

he just sent out a notice to the neighbors, one and all

as how he'd like their company that evening at a ball

and when writin' out he was careful to suggest to them

if they found a hat of his convenient to the door

the more they put in whenever he requested them

the better would the music be for batterin' the floor

with the toot of the flute and the twiddle of the fiddle-o!

Hopping in the middle like a herrin' on the griddle-o!

Up! Down, hands around crossing to the wall

hadn't we the gaiety at Phil the fluter's ball?

Fuck's sake!

"I think it's nearly time," says he "for passin' round the hat"

so paddy passed the caubeen round and looking mighty cute

says, "you've got to pay the Piper when he's tooterin' on the flute"

what on earth are you doing?

Taking samples of the water from the stream that feeds into the lake.

I saw you take a fall.

Did you laugh?

Yes, of course.

The great man stumbles.

There are three streams from three natural Springs which feed the lake.

I'm taking samples of all three back to the brewery.

Our specialists who test the purity of the water

can tell me which of...

I'm your morning's entertainment.

Specialists who test the purity of our water will tell me which is most pure.

Then I will dig a well.

You will send the clean spring water to cloonboo?

Yes. I will erect several water pumps.

Fear not, each of them will be labeled with the guinness name and a harp.

Because as we established last night, all acts of kindness

must be publicly branded for the good of the company.

I suppose that means you'll make us put the harp on our housing trust building.

Well, we are detonating half of Dublin for you and Anne, under the guinness name.

You could've sent someone else to collect the water samples

and saved your clothes.

I just wanted to do something.

Couldn't really sleep last night.

Yesterday, I found out you are not who I thought you were.

And that we might have more in common than I thought.

It's fine.

No, please.

Please! I fucking…

Tea?

What?

Well, it's just the way you say "tea." So brightly.

Like flicking a crystal glass.

Whatever do you mean, my love?

When you arrived home at half past one in the morning

and I looked out my window, I saw you get out of the carriage

and throw up into the fountain.

Oysters.

Oysters! "Tea!"

What "oyster" tore your clothes and drew blood last night?

It was a pursuit.

Running into alleys.

Leaping over rotten fences.

Hiding.

Hiding from the police.

No, really. No, no. Please. I really... I don't deserve tenderness.

It's all my fault. My fault, and my stupid family's name.

What matters, my love…

Is that you escaped.

And therefore nothing really happened.

Life continues. Your reputation is unblemished.

And when the next election comes around, you can stand again for parliament.

Mps are above the law.

I almost get arrested. The next day, you have me standing for election.

I want you to have power.

…- I don't want to be married to a brewer.

I want to be married to a government minister.

A knighthood.

Lord Arthur guinness.

Only love will get you caught. Find someone, fuck them…

…hail a cab, and come safely home.

Just so you know, I can't bear to be the face of another scandal.

- Dubliners hate me. - Arthur…

As husband and wife, we decide these things together.

And together…

We will soon realize that I'm always right.

Begging your pardon, sir, madam.

Mr. Rafferty is here.

- I'm not sure at whose request, but… - mine.

I have a job for him.

It is science that has helped me to discover the truth.

And I have calculated…

I have calculated

that we are now living in the sixth unsabbatic day of creation.

That it is 6,000 years since Adam was betrayed by Eve.

And therefore by this calculation,

it is scientifically proven… uncle Henry,

I've come to hear your confession.

And therefore by this calculation,

it is scientifically proven that the end of the world

is coming to pass very, very soon.

How dare you interrupt a sacred sermon

inside the house of god...

I have permission from sir Arthur guinness to be myself.

To be absolutely myself, regardless of your kinship.

I'm capable of sacrilege by deed even here.

And it would be deeply unholy of you

to provoke me into a passion that I cannot control.

You are threatening my life on behalf of your master.

My master, who you once compared to a liffey eel.

An eel who you said you had by the gills.

Now it is the eel that has you by the gills, Henry grattan.

And, yes, my master is threatening your life.

At first, I thought the sons would be softer than their father.

But they are not.

With their steamships, and their locomotives,

and their global plans, they will not be stopped.

Which is why they need you gone

to a place away from Dublin.

Enough to get you and your family to London.

I will not be bullied

by an unrighteous mandrake Mary Ann

cuckolded by his own foreman.

Well then, tear up the check.

And I swear to god, here in his own house…

This Sunday,

when your congregation comes to this church,

they will hear the grave news

that their holy prophet was found washed up on the rocks

at the foot of the pool beg lighthouse

with lampreys writhing in his throat

and leeches sucking on his eyes.

We are far away from heaven and we are far away from hell

living in the endless mist and waiting for a yell

the dreams are getting bigger but the thirst is big enough…

Sir, the road is closed. They are taking down the old tenements

to make way for the new guinness housing estate.

I'm not afraid of a bit of progress.

But good will never win.

Dear Byron, I am writing to share glad tidings from Dublin.

You should know that the profits that are flowing from New York

are being used to serve god's purpose.

The secret deal which you struck with our fenian friends

is therefore a disreputable means to a virtuous end.

In this work, I am supported by the women of the guinness trust,

who never cease to surprise me with their devotion to the cause.