Faking It

- Previously on Faking It... -

You get way too much pleasure torturing her.

Wait.

Do you want him to forward this to the whole school or not?

- Still hate you. - Still hate you too, boo.

If Amy knew about this,

you honestly think she'd be okay with it?

Maybe you two are okay with this sneaking-around thing,

but I'm not.

I wish there was a way that we could do this.

We could have a threesome.

- A threesome? - Yes.

I actually suggested

that Liam have a threesome with me...

and you.

You remember how I thought

that Liam pulled away because he wasn't into me?

Turns out he's way into me,

he just felt too guilty

sneaking around behind your back.

I heard that, and I don't know what came over me.

I just...

Suggested a menage a trois?

Don't worry.

I'm gonna tell him that I had a brief lapse in sanity.

I mean, we couldn't.

We wouldn't.

You wouldn't...

Would you?

No, Karma,

I would not have a threesome with you and Liam!

You are so having a threesome with Karma and Liam.

Okay, first Karma loses it. Now you?

Amy, this might as well be

a big bi-curious bat signal in the sky.

Karma wants you to have sex with her.

With her and a guy.

One does not suggest a three-way with one's BFF

all willy-nilly.

She has to be into you...

in part or subconsciously or whatever.

Don't get my hopes up. You could be wrong.

You'll never know unless you try.

Get it? Tri?

You're really suggesting

that I have sex with Karma and Liam?

You won't have to touch him if you don't want to.

Just let Karma be at the center of this sex sandwich.

You and Liam can be the bread.

And then you'll finally see

if she prefers whole grain...

or sourdough.

Why do I have to be sourdough?

And how do you know so much about three-ways?

At theater camp,

I fiddled on more than just the roof.

Trust me, this is the perfect way

to see how Karma feels about you.

I don't know.

I think it's pretty well established

that she's pretty good at faking it.

There are always signs.

Signs? For what?

Early onset Alzheimer's.

It's really tearing families apart.

Got to jet.

What was that about?

Never mind.

I think we should do it...

the threesome, I mean.

You'd...

Amy, you'd do that for me?

Are you sure about this?

If you're sure.

Oh, my God, Amy, I love you.

I promise it won't be weird at all.

Yeah, I'm not so sure that there's a way around that.

Aah!

What?

What the fosse?

Lauren, what have you done to my yoga room?

The school's yoga room is now my dance studio.

Brought to you by our friends at Skwerkel.

What's next, converting the wood shop

into your own chapter of the KKK?

Move aside.

No, I need this space

to train for the Lonestar Texas Teen dance competition.

My dance partner should be here any minute...

Dance partner?

Ah, bigot Barbie comes with her own closet-case Ken.

Bigot?

For the record, I've never been antigay.

Just anti-you!

And who you calling a closet case?

I've been out and proud since my first communion.

There you are, Lolo.

This was just leaving.

Wait a minute.

What the happened to you?

I volunteered with Habitat for Humanity last weekend,

and I tripped on a nail gun.

But qualifiers are this Saturday!

No, no, no! This cannot be happening!

You're freaking out.

We just need to find you a substitute partner.

I can teach him the routine myself.

How about Tommy?

Chronic straight-guy-rhythm deficiency.

Fine. Fine. I'll do it.

I'm Shane, by the way.

What?

Why are you still here?

Trust me, I've got the moves.

Lala, we don't have time for an audition montage.

Shane's here. He's willing.

- Don't you want to win? - No, but he and I-we...

Damn it.

I do really want to win.

Well, then let's get to twerk.

Hey-oh!

Hey.

Oh.

Hi.

You both...

How's it going on? I mean...

what's up?

- Liam, you remember Amy. - Of course.

Hello, Amy.

Hey. Let's have a threesome.

What?

Really?

I, uh... I thought you were joking about that, Karma.

I mean, girls...

they throw around the three-way offer all the time,

but they never follow through.

We're lesbians.

Our word is our bond.

Our people never joke about threesomes.

It's a whole thing.

I did not know that. Um...

Are you guys sure?

Well, we're sure.

Are you sure?

I'm totally sure if you are.

Just don't want you to think that I'm some womanizing,

heteronormative bro-douche

who's gonna brag to his buddies.

You know, I'm just all for openness and...

sexual exploration.

Right.

So when are we thinking?

Oh. Oh, we're picking the time right now?

Great. Um...

Yeah, let's coordinate schedules.

Tonight's not good. I have a chem test tomorrow.

- Friday? - Friday!

Mm-mm, we're guest-judging

The A.V. Club's short-film fest Friday, remember?

Saturday.

We'll make it work.

Great. Um...

Should I...

bring anything?

A deep-fried appetizer sampler, extra calamari.

Oh. Okay, sure.

She's kidding.

This one.

Just bring your sexy, open-minded self.

Maybe a few condoms.

It seems responsible.

You can never be too careful.

Rest assured, I'll handle everything.

I will see you there.

And I will see you there,

'cause all three of us will be there.

Okay. Bye.

- See you Saturday! - Bye.

How in the whole wide world could I not know you...

Lolo, is it?

Pablo.

Lala here gave me that nickname at dance camp,

and it kind of stuck.

Dance camp? Tell me more.

Pablo's one of the top students

at Our Lady of Perpetual Chastity.

You know, the most prestigious

Christian prep school in Austin.

Oh, man.

That sucks. Sorry about that.

Why?

Don't tell me you're one of those judgmental gays

that looks down on Christians.

Judgy? Me? No way.

I'm very spiritual.

Just finished this really super

healing cleanse I read about on Goop.

The one with fermented habanero oil

and sparkling grapefruit water?

- You goop? - I goop all the time!