Below Deck Mediterranean

Previously, this season on "Below Deck Med"...

We’re looking like ----ing amateurs.

Tess and Christian are actually terrible.

This is beyond a joke.

I’m really sorry. I got to let you go.

We’re bringing in Joe.

Max, I’m impressed. You came back a changed man.

Working with Joe previously,

I’ve decided to make him lead deckhand.

Max, you cheeky ----ing prick.

Ah, oui.

All of this sexual tension

is exploding over everyone’s faces.

I’ve only ever had one real relationship

seven years ago,

and since that day,

I’ve never had a butterfly feeling from a girl until now.

Oh, my gosh.

I have a huge sinus headache, and then I can’t breathe.

So, this next charter,

I’m going to have you sit it out.

I want to give her some time to take care of herself.

I’m going to go to a hotel today.

Well, get better soon.

Take good care of my boy.

If he did something with Kizzi tonight,

it would be sh--.

Don’t want you to go into this charter

-without another deckhand. -Okay.

So, I’m bringing in Gael.

-Hello. -How are you?

You can’t say that.

Just don’t want history to repeat itself.

I can’t jump off a cliff

and not be afraid of what might be at the bottom.

What’s going on with you and Gael?

We had a chat last night.

I just want to build trust with her.

-Oh... -Yeah.

We are meant to be together.

Like, I can’t see a future with someone

if it’s not Gael.

There’s flirting and giggling over here in front of V.

He needs to reel it in big time.

One second, please.

The last charter...

We got a lot of bodacious tatas.

I don’t like it.

-You gave me no truffle. -I ordered king crab, though.

No king crab.

Ow!

I need to get her to the doctor.

All right, guys. I’ll leave you to it.

Why family style? Again.

Right at the very end, it is all falling apart.

Me and Kizzi, I kissed her.

I just want to have fun.

I’ve grown this season as a person.

I’m wanting to be a better version of myself.

I hope, Joe, for the sake of our friendship,

doesn’t keep making these dumbass decisions.

The man needs to wise up and grow up.

Oh, for ’s sakes.

’s sakes.

I’ve always been able to chat sh-- to Nathan

and have a bit of a laugh, but now I don’t know what’s changed.

Having that person who. like, the party playboy...

On the last two years, Joe did bring out a side of me

that is a bit boisterous and I’m not proud of.

But yeah, it’s immature.

It’s just time to move on to the new chapter.

-I’m here. -Thank God.

Come sit with me, come.

-Come, my friends. -Oh.

Guys, question.

What do you call tomato sauce, gravy or sauce?

We call it gravy in Rhode Island.

-Sauce. -Thank you.

Gravy is brown.

When I think of gravy, I think brown.

So what do you call marinara sauce, then?

I just call it marinara sauce. I don’t call it gravy.

This is a fight between Italians.

These guests are fun, but they’re like 75% scary.

And we did not get off to a good start.

The weather’s bad,

so we’re going to entertain you on the dock.

Why can’t we go out?

If she can’t handle winds, what is she captain for?

It’s not about that. It’s about the seas.

I don’t like it.

I can’t get that back taste, though.

There’s a lot of pressure to keep them happy,

and I’m going to deliver.

By the end of it, they’ll be, like, yelling out,

Tony, isn’t this fantastic?

-I’ll get you some. -Thank you. You’re the best.

And, like, watermelon, if you have it.

Yep, sure.

Baby, you leave today.

-All right, Joe. -Can I have a ginger ale?

Go.

I’m going to leave him to surprise you.

Do you want a tequila and ginger ale or something?

I’ll try that.

We’ll leave the jet skis until last because it’s just easier.

You’re quiet today, man.

Yeah?

I’m going to go check the guests.

Go down for an hour.

How are you doing, Josh?

Good, Captain.

What are you doing for dinner tonight?

The starter, scallop with the dry ice.

-That’s going to be plated. -Good.

Girls! What time do you want to eat?

Like, 9:00, 9:30’s good?

10 for dinner?

Are you joking?

Joe, Joe, Nathan.

Kizzi, she’s gonna be in port in ten minutes.

Go in and collect her.

Behave.

Josh.

The guests, they’re wondering if they could do dinner at 10?

-10 p.m. -I know, it’s late.

Yeah, whatever it is, it is.

Why can’t I just inject myself?

-You have to be an artist. -That is true.

Case in point, look at what your lips look like.

-That is true. -We have to fix those, sweetie.

That’s tender away.

-Silver and black disco party. -Oh.

Okay, it is a party.

Hello.

How are you going?

Going good.

What’s Minorca like?

Cool. What are you doing tonight?

The fact that she didn’t jump on that plane

and go straight home shows me

that she doesn’t want to just call it quits.

Now I’m sat here daydreaming about moving forward

and have a beautiful life together.

Could you imagine me watching her walk down the aisle?

Man, I’m crying me eyes out.

Right, well, enjoy your evening.

Bye.

Your knight in shining armor has arrived.

Fantastic.

Oh, my God, look at you, man.

At least it’s the last day.

I’m back, baby.

The doctor did tell me when I was at the hospital,

he said someone needs to give her a kiss on the lips

or she might die.

My prescription.

Nathan, we’re three minutes out.

Oh, good.

Like, rock n roll this day like the rolling stone.

Kizzi-whizzy!

-Whoa. -Right.

No, don’t.

- -

I’m trying not to give them hoes the satisfaction. No.

But like, I might lose it eventually.

Oh, what the ?

Welcome home.

All right, I’m going to take a shower, guys.

-I love you. -Bye.

See you in a few minutes.

I’ll see you downstairs.

Take a couple more and then I’ll go take a shower myself.

Their dinner’s way too late for me.

Yeah, it’s really late.

-Whoa. -Wow.

-Wow, look at that. -----ing madness.

Holy sh--.

What happens if you stick your finger in there?

Don’t mate. It’s dangerous, yeah.

Let me stick my head in instead, though.

The last dinner means everything.

But these guests have been a tough one.

Truffle’s out of season, I tried to get some.

I know you’re a big truffle girl.

Don’t... Don’t... Don’t even tell me.

I’m not going to it up.

Fully-plated immaculate dishes.

If these guys don’t like it,

I’m going to look them in the eye and I’m going to say,

get out of here.

That was my New York accent.

I actually have some truffle.

You’ve got some truffle?

I’ll say I imported it from Australia yesterday.

No, I won’t say that, because it’s not good truffle.

Well done, chef.

I don’t like crutches. I find them very difficult to use.

But at least it’s, like, protected now, you know?

-You know. -I know.