All My Life

Subtitles by explosiveskull 𝕄_𝕀_𝕊𝔽𝕠𝕣𝔼𝕧𝕖𝕣

The average person lives 27,375 days.

That's all we get, if we're lucky.

27,375.

At first, I thought it didn't really seem like a lot of time.

But then again, how many days do we really remember anyway?

Most days pass by unnoticed, unremarkable, unmarked.

Because we only remember the days when we feel something happened.

Something beautiful or tragic.

Most days will pass in a blur.

So many of mine did.

They were lost in routine or school or both.

I didn't notice my life was becoming a series of forgotten days.

- Ugly. - Yeah.

Everything was being saved for later.

You made that money, honey.

Live spontaneously, later.

- Dude! - Travel, later.

- Amanda! - Find love, later.

- - Sorry, sorry.

But everything can change in a day.

If you kill my friends, I kill you.

And what might be missing...

becomes so very clear.

This place has, like, three stars on Yelp.

Oh, really?

Just one drink and then we'll go to dinner.

- I swear. - I'm gonna go pee.

I'll grab a table.

- Get beer. - He's doing it!

Ah! Whoo!

No.

How did we end up at a sports bar today?

I'm sorry. I get that I'm giving you PTSD from your time at Ruck's.

Stop.

You were the best worst bartender that I had ever seen.

Gosh. There's always a line. Jeez.

- I know. - No matter where you go.

Yum.

I would like to propose a toast

to the beautiful, brilliant,

wildly talented, recently promoted Amanda.

- Cheers. - Oh, thank you. Thank you.

And to getting an assistant.

- There you go! -

- Oh, incoming. - How you doing, ladies?

Y'all look a little lonely. Keep you some company.

Uh, there's three of us.

I'm Dave. This is Kyle. Sol.

I'm sorry...

They're the lonely ones. I'm just embarrassed.

Embarrassed for you or for them?

For them right now.

And me... very soon.

All right. We're just gonna start over.

We just wanted to come over and say hi. So, hi.

- Hi. - Hi.

I'ma tell y'all a story that's gonna change your life.

- I... - No, no. We're gonna go.

- You don't have to. - You don't have to...

You do wanna hear the story. Listen, you wanna hear the...

No, no, no. Now we have to hear the story. What kind of story?

I'm gonna tell you ladies

a story about the time I almost lost my pinkie toe.

- Wait. - Okay. I'm out.

I'm gonna get you drinks and save myself the embarrassment.

- I'll come with you. - No, you will not.

You will stay right here, 'cause we telling this story together.

- Yeah. - All right.

I'm on the back of the moped, right? This guy right here, he's driving.

All of a sudden, a squirrel just pops out of nowhere.

At this point, the moped is grinding, like, up against the curb,

and now my toe is pinned down, right?

You know what? I am gonna go help your friend with the drinks.

But, um, great story.

Hey, where you...

Especially when you do a takedown. You don't want them to come from under...

So, who you guys rooting for? Baldy No Neck or Big Arm Chicken Legs?

Um, baldy with no neck. He's the underdog.

- Another Dave's Margarita? - Yeah.

Make it two.

So, your friend's story...

Oh, yeah. I'm...

I apologize for that. He thinks it's a great icebreaker.

It's actually not a bad idea, all things considered.

It's playing the odds.

How so?

So, 99 out of 100 girls will hate that story.

- Right? Hate it. - Mm-hmm.

But if he can find that one,

that one girl who loves a good smooshed baby toe story, she'll be floored.

It's a soul-mate moment for her.

If you believe in destiny and chance and meeting the right person,

then it's worth the risk.

He has the right idea.

...jumped off the trash can.

- I still think it's the wrong idea. - Maybe.

Okay, this stare is officially

two seconds away from turning full creepazoid.

- Yeah. Okay. - You should probably blink or look left.

- Do something else with your eyes. - I'm sorry.

I blame it on the margarita. I am usually very witty and charming.

That's not an excuse.

James Bond is fully hammered 24/7. He is always witty and charming.

- Okay, I can give you some wit. Yeah? - Yeah? Wit me.

- Yeah. Bring it. - Yeah?

Okay. All right.

When I look into your... Wow, that's...

Is something supposed to be happening? I'm confused.

Okay, okay. Pause, pause. I'm gonna try to give charming a shot.

Okay, I'm...

I'm gonna give you some charm, all right? Give you some charm.

- No, that's worse. - Did you...

- That was complete... Worse. - It's bad. I can't...

Stop. Stop right now. Abort.

- I'm gonna stop. -

Whoo! Whoo!

Whoo!

Beat my best time again.

That's weird, 'cause you're, like, 15 minutes late.

Nah. Saturday mornings, there's a 20-minute grace period.

Technically, I'm early.

- Ready? - Come on. Let's go.

Well, I might sweat margaritas after last night, so...

- Gross. - I'm sorry.

So, what is it you do again?

- I'm in digital marketing. - What does that mean?

We target consumers based on their GPS location.

You know, go for impulse buys.

What about you?

I'm going into debt creation. Getting my master's in psych.

You wanna be a therapist?

I don't know. Maybe.

People love talking to me, and I always give spot-on advice.

So, yeah.

- Cramp. - You okay? You all right?

I got a cramp.

Lift your arm up.

- Why? - It'll help. Trust me.

Okay. Um...

I lied to you.

I hate running.

I'm a really bad runner.

God, this was a horrible idea for a first date.

Oh, so this is a date?

No.

All right. We have a little more left. Hey, what are you doing?

I earned one of these.

- No. Not on my watch. Come on. - What?

- I got something better. Come on. - No, come on.

- Last wind. - So far.

That's right.

- Wait. There are hot dogs here. - There are hot dogs.

You took me from a hot dog stand to another hot dog stand.

Isn't this a great finish line? I love this place.

Hey!

- Sol! How you doing? - Hey!

- What's happening, buddy? Okay. - I'll be right out.

- Ah! - What's up, man?

- How you doing? - I'm good.

- What you got for us? - My new zucchini fritters.

Ooh! Oh, Peter, this is Jenn.

- Hey. - Hi.

She wanted hot dogs for breakfast.

- No, I wanted hot dogs for brunch. - All right.

Well, brunch, it's not really about food. It's more about day drinking, isn't it?

Exactly.

If I wasn't jogging,

I would totally be at my cousin Gigi's place.

Pepper and Salt.

Oh! They got a great Moscow mule. Love that spot.

So, what do you think?

Mm! It's really good.

Missing a little something.

Uh, yeah.

Could use a smidge of sour cream and dill. And a little bit of honey.

- That'd be good. That'd be good. - Yeah.

I gotta get you back on the truck, man.

- You're a chef? - No. No, I'm not a chef.

Oh, he's the best. And I need him back on the truck.

- Stop. Stop. - I gotta get you back on here.

I used to help out on some weekends, that's all.

"Help out."

Hey, you wanna give it a try?

Go ahead.

- No. That look. - I'm sorry.

I'm not really a zucchini person.

I got something you guys will like, and I'll get you a couple waters.

- Thanks, man. - Thank you.

Every vendor's local.

I can't believe I've never been here.

These are nice.

God, these colors are amazing.

- Yeah. These are beautiful. - Thank you.

Thank you.

- Hi. - Hi.

- These are beautiful. - Thank you.

Rose.

I love lavender.

Mmm.