Alice in Wonderland

". . wanted leaders, and had been of late

much accustomed to usurpation and conquest. "

"Edwin and Morcar, the Earls of Mercia and Northumbria declared for him,

and even Stigand... "

- Alice. - Hm?

I'm listening.

"And even Stigand, the Archbishop of Canterbury,

agreed to meet with William and offer him the crown. "

- - "William's conduct at first was... "

Alice.

Will you kindly pay attention to your history lesson.

I'm sorry. But how can one possibly pay attention

to a book with no pictures in it?

My dear child, there are many good books in this world without pictures.

In this world, perhaps.

But in my world the books would be nothing but pictures.

Your world? What nonsense.

- Nonsense? - Once more, from the beginning.

That's it, Dinah.

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense.

Nothing would be what it is because everything would be what it isn't.

And, contrariwise, what it is, it wouldn't be.

And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?

In my world, you wouldn't say "meow".

- You'd say, "Yes, Miss Alice. " -

But you would. You'd be just like people, Dinah.

And all the other animals, too.

In my world...

Oh, Dinah. It's just a rabbit with a waistcoat... and a watch.

My fur and whiskers! I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!

This is curious. What could a rabbit possibly be late for?

Please, sir.

I'm late, I'm late for a very important date.

No time to say hello, goodbye. I'm late, late, late.

It must be awfully important, like a party or something.

Mr. Rabbit. Wait!

No, no, no, I'm overdue. I'm really in a stew.

No time to say goodbye, hello. I'm late, I'm late, I'm late.

My. What a peculiar place to have a party.

You know, Dinah, we really shouldn't... be doing this.

After all, we haven't been invited...

and curiosity often leads to trouble.|

Goodbye, Dinah. Goodbye!

Oh...

Well, after this I shall think nothing of... of falling down stairs.

Oh!

Goodness. What if I should fall right through the centre of the Earth...

and come out the other side where people walk upside down?

But that's silly. Nobody...

Oh!

Mr. Rabbit. Wait. Please.

Curiouser and curiouser.

- Ow. -

I beg your pardon.

Quite all right, but you did give me quite a turn.

- I was following... - Rather good, what? Door knob, turn.

- Please, sir. - One good turn deserves another.

- What can I do for you? - I'm looking for a white rabbit.

- So, if you don't mind... - Eh?

Oh.

There he is. I simply must get through.

Sorry. You're much too big. Simply impassable.

- You mean impossible. - No, impassable. Nothing's impossible.

- Try the bottle on the table. - Table?

Read the directions. Directly you'll be directed in the right direction.

"Drink me. " Hm.

Better look first, for if one drinks much from a bottle marked "Poison",

it's almost certain to disagree with one sooner or later.

- Beg your pardon? - Just giving myself some good advice.

But...

Tastes like cherry tart.

Custard, pineapple, roast turkey.

Goodness!

- What did I do? -

You almost went out like a candle.

But look. I'm just the right size.

No use. I forgot to tell you. I'm locked.

Oh, no.

- But, of course, you've got the key. - What key?

Don't tell me you've left it up there.

Oh, dear.

- Whatever will I do? - Try the box, naturally.

Oh!

"Eat me. " All right.

But goodness knows what this will do.

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

What did you say?

I said a little of that went a long way.|

I don't think it's so funny.

Now I shall never get out.

Come, come, now. Crying won't help.

I know, but I... I... I just can't seem to stop.

Hey. This won't do.

Oh, oh, oh...

This won't do at all.

You, up there, stop!

I say. Look.

The bottle. The bott...

Oh, dear. I do wish I hadn't cried so much.

Ahoy, and other nautical expressions.

Land ho, by jove.

- Where away, Dodo? - Dodo?

Three points to starboard. Away, me hearties.

Have you in port in no time at all now.

Mr. Dodo. Please. Please help me.

Pardon me, but would you mind helping me? Please?

Yoo-hoo! Yoo-hoo!

Help me. Please.

Help me.

- I say, you'll never get dry that way. - Get dry?

Have to run with the others. First rule of the caucus race.

But how can I... ?

That's better. Have you dry in no time now.

No one can ever get dry this way.

Nonsense. I'm as dry as a bone already.

- Yes, but... - All right, let's have it now.

Look lively.

The white rabbit. Mr. Rabbit.

- My goodness. I'm late. - Don't go away. I'll be right back.

- I'm late. - Don't step on the fish.

Watch it. Stop kicking that mackerel. Brilliant. Jolly well done.

Mr. Rabbit. Oh, Mr. Rabbit.

Oh, dear. I'm sure he came this way.

Do you suppose he could be hiding?

Hmm. Not here.

I wonder...

No. I suppose he must have...

Why. What peculiar little figures.

- Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum. -

If you think we're waxworks, you ought to pay, you know.

If you think we're alive, you ought to speak to us.

- That's logic. - Well...

It's been nice meeting you. Goodbye.

- You're beginning backwards. - First thing in a visit is to say...

- That's manners. - Really?

Well my name is Alice and I'm following a white rabbit, so...

- You can't go yet. - No, the visit has just started.

- I'm very sorry. - Would you like to play hide-and-seek?

- Or Button? Who's got the button? - No, thank you.

If you stay long enough, we might have a battle.

That's very kind of you, but I must be going.

- Why? - Because I'm following a white rabbit.

- Why? - I'm curious to know where he's going.

Oh, she's curious.

The oysters were curious, too, weren't they?

Aye, and you remember what happened to them.

Poor things.

Why? What did happen to the oysters?

- Oh, you wouldn't be interested. - But I am.

Oh, no. You're in much too much of a hurry.

Well, perhaps I could spare a little time.

You could? Well...

"The Walrus and the Carpenter. "

Or "The Story of the Curious Oysters. "

Mr. Walrus, said the carpenter

My brain begins to perk

We'll sweep this clear in half a year if you don't mind the work

Work?

- The time has come - The walrus said

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