IT: Welcome to Derry

Trouble! Trouble! Trouble!

Trouble! Trouble! Trouble! Trouble! Trouble!

- Trouble! - Mothers of River City,

heed that warning before it's too late.

Watch for the tell-tale signs of corruption.

The minute your son leaves the house,

does he re-buckle his knickerbockers

below the knee?

Is there a nicotine stain on his index finger?

A dime-novel hidden in the corncrib?

Is he starting to memorize jokes from Captain Billy's Whiz Bang?

Are certain words

creeping into his conversation?

Words like...

like "swell"?

Trouble!

A-ha, and "so's your old man."

- Trouble! - If so, my friends...

You got trouble...

Psst. Kid, get over here.

Kid, get over here. Now.

Get over here. Hey!

Cal, what's going on?

It's the Clements boy again, Hank.

Third time this week I've caught him

sneaking in for a freebie.

Hmm. Leave him be. You ever see that boy's damn family?

Pity is not gonna keep the lights on, Hank.

Hmm.

Uh, Ronnie.

You, um, you see a boy running around here about your age?

Yeah, Pops.

He went that way.

Come on. Back to work.

Music Man, directed by?

- Morton DaCosta. - Hmm.

First film was?

Personal favorite of your nana's.

- Auntie Mame! - Ooh! That's my girl.

Hey!

Next time, I'm calling the police!

You hear me, kid?

I mean it!

You all right, young man?

- Yes. - Look at you, you poor thing.

Get in before you catch your death of cold.

Thank you.

Wrap yourself in this, dear. You must be freezing.

Thank you.

Now, you just tell us where home is,

and we'll get you back to your parents

safe and sound, okay?

Anywhere but Derry.

Well, we're headed to Portland,

so you hitched the right ride.

WNXE News Radio.

It's the top of the hour.

Here are tonight's top stories. Fresh reports tonight

out of Moscow of more underground nuclear tests.

Experts now warn the resulting radiation

poses a global risk with potential consequences

ranging from cancer to genetic mutations

resulting in highly

unusual birth defects...

Dad, can we put something else on?

This stuff gives me the willies.

Willies? W-I-L--

Ray, not now.

He's going through a phase. He spells everything.

- L-I-E-S. - That's right.

Why don't you show our new friend

what a good little speller you are?

Spell "bungalow."

B-U-N-G-A-L-O-W.

Spell "symphony."

S-Y-M-P-H-O-N-Y.

Spell "fuchsia."

F-U-C-H-S-I-A.

Now, that's a ten-dollar word.

Spell "trouble."

T-R-U...

T-R-O-A...

- T-R-U... - Ugh!

T-R-O-U-B-L-E, you idiot!

- Be nice, Arlene. - I am nice!

When I wanna be.

There goes my little harlot.

Couldn't glue those legs together if you tried,

I tell ya.

Reminds me of her mother.

I... I thought you said we were headed to Portland.

Spell "vasectomy," baby.

Can you use that in a sentence?

Your father got a vasectomy

right after he impregnated me again.

V-A-S-E...

Can you pull over, please?

...C-T-O-M-Y.

- Necrosis. - N-E-C-R-O-S-I-S.

"Kidnapping."

There's a gas station up ahead,

- and I have to pee. - "Maggots."

If we could just pull over, even for a second.

- ...G-O-T-S. - "Cadaver."

- C-A-D-A-V-E-R. - "Strangulation."

No, no! Please, no!

...L-A-T-I-O-N.

- Let me out! - "Out." O-U-T!

- Let me out! - O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T!

- O-U-T. - Let me out!

O-U-T.

O-U-T. O-U-T.

I'll handle the driving, son.

O-U--

O-U-T. O-U-T. O-U-T.

Looks like somebody else wants to get... O-U-T.

O-U-T! O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T!

O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T!

O-U-T! O-U-T!

Aw.

He's beautiful, dear.

Isn't he, though?

Come here.

Come meet your family, sweetheart.

Look at my baby!

Oh, shit!

Derry, huh?

I bet there's zero nightclubs in this town.

Probably not one decent Chinese restaurant.

Come on, Pauly. We survived Korea.

Pretty sure we can survive this.

Yeah, speak for yourself.

Major Hanlon, Captain Russo.

I'm Colonel Fuller, General Shaw's XO.

He asked that I greet you airmen personally.

How was the flight up?

- Smooth. - A little bumpy.

Excellent, gentlemen. This way, please.

Your skills and experience

will be put to good use here, Major.

DAFB is one of only six SAC bases in the entire country.

Now, it might seem somewhat remote,

but make no mistake.

As the northernmost continental United States Air Force base,

we are the tip of the spear.

Soviet airspace is a brisk seven-hour flight that way.

Straight over the Arctic Ocean and on till morning.

In other words, when the nuclear shit

hits the fan, we'll be the first call.

If. If the nuclear shit hits the fan.

I'm a bit of an optimist.

Yeah, I'm not.

Uh, sir, what's that over there?

That's Special Projects.

Sounds, uh, sounds special.

I understand you're only living on base temporarily, Major.

Uh, yes, sir.

Renting a house in town, just waiting for everything

to get all set up. Should be finished by the time

my family gets here.

What, you don't want 'em to live near Uncle Pauly?

Thought I was family, huh?

Eight years living on base, I just think my missus is ready

for a little taste of normal.

Well, if normal is what you're after,

you two are going to love Derry.

Hey, Lills, you okay? Jeez, I'm sorry.

It's a bunch of fucking cretins, that's what they are.

I'm fine.

Guess I'll just stink like pickle juice until dinner.

Well, if you ask me...

...you smell delicious.

Bert the Turtle says, "Duck and Cover!"

So, my aunt said we can come on any weekend we want this summer.

Oh, swell.

My cousin Ray said they have a bunch of parties

at the beach that are crazy.

They're supposed to be the ginchiest.

What? What are you looking at?

My eyes?

These new glasses make them look huge, don't they?

That optometrist is a sadist.

No. No, Marge, your eyes are fine.

- Sincerely. - You have to promise me,

because I'm not going through the rest of the year

looking like some bug-eyed freak.

It's hard enough to get Joey Navinsky to notice me

- as it is. - I mean, obviously,