Frances Ha

No feet!

No! No!

- No! Not the hair! - Yes.

- Not the - Frances! - Ow!

I tried to make a frittata, but it's really more of a scramble.

This is interesting.

“To praise a work of literature by calling it sincere...

is now at best a way of saying that, although it may be given...

no aesthetic or intellectual admiration -”

I wouldn't eat a domesticated dog.

You say that just because they're cute.

Don't be stupid.

I should sleep in my own bed.

Why?

Because I bought it.

Stay.

But take off your socks.

- It's hairless? - No, it has fine, curly hair.

There's this house in Westchester -

the basement is all Cornish Rexes.

It smells awful. The top floor is Siamese cats.

- I'm allergic to cats. - They're hypoallergenic.

- This is a special Frances kitty. - Oh. Who knew?

This one's the runt, which is cheaper, but I think it's the best one anyway.

I figure one runt and one regular.

I put a hundred-dollar down payment on each cat.

Well, 80 for the runt and a hundred for the other one.

Why not just get one cat?

A cat needs a buddy. If you get one, you need two.

I'll give you $200 to get no cats.

So who will take care of them if you go away?

I thought we could get 'em together.

And move them back and forth between our apartments?

No. I thought maybe...

you could move in with me.

Oh. Wow.

- Do you want to move in with me? - Yeah.

Yes. I mean, I do have this other thing.

- What other thing? - Well, I don't know.

I promised Sophie I'd stay through the lease...

and she'll probably want to renew it.

Is that bad? I'm sorry. I feel bad.

- Can't she find someone else? - Yeah, but it's my friend.

- Uh-huh. - I want to move in with you. - Okay.

- I feel bad. - Don't feel bad. Forget it.

- No. What? - Nothing.

- You're mad. - I'm not mad. I'm disappointed.

- I feel bad. - Stop feeling bad.

Frances, I asked you to move in. You said no.

- But I can't. - You can. You don't want to.

- Who is it? - I don't have to get it.

- Who is it? - Sophie. I'll call her later. - Just pick up the phone.

- Are you sure? - Answer it.

Yo, girl! What's up?

Hey, where are you?

I can't come.

Are you drunk?

I love you!

Ahh! Dumpling House!

I can't really talk right now.

Okay. I love you.

Okay.

I love you.

She's with these guys...

Benji and Lev, at a party in Chinatown.

They're drunk.

I don't know.

Maybe this isn't working.

- I'm sorry. - Me too..

Maybe - No, never mind.

- What? - I want to pay you for the cats.

I'm not gonna take money from you...

but I am going to get the cats anyway.

But then you're gonna be a single guy with two cats.

Why would I be single?

- With two cats. - No, I know.

I mean, why would I be single?

I don't know.

I thought you said that this isn't working.

I mean, if we don't move in together. If we can't move in together.

We can move in together.

I don't know that I believe anything I'm saying.

Uh-huh.

This hasn't been great for a while.

“This hasn't been great for a while.”

This has not been -

- Where are you going? - Home, I guess.

I'm really... tired.

I'm always so tired.

Let's move in together.

Hi!

You're crazy. You know Lev?

Yes.

- And Benji? - Hi.

I can't get interested in art or books...

or movies about animals.

The animals have to talk or be at war for me to be interested.

Don't hit the third rail.

Shit!

The F's not running.

- I want a sip. - Do you want your own?

I want a sip.

The coffee people are right.

We are like a lesbian couple that doesn't have sex anymore.

- Wait. Come back. - Don't pick at your face.

I don't like smoking alone.

Me and Dan don't have sex anymore.

Didn't have sex anymore.

Yeah, that's why you broke up.

And if it happened, he would just -

He only had one way he could finish.

Oh, I hate that.

It was always with me facing flat on the bed from behind...

which just -

everything that matters is covered up.

- It's like with me and Patch. - Yo, Patchy!

'Sup, brah?

The way he always likes to come in my face.

Yeah. Classy.

He's the kind of guy who says, “I've gotta take a leak.”

And wears predistressed baseball hats.

He's a nice guy - you know, for today.

I should feel bad I went to that party.

You deserved it. You just got out of relationship jail.

- I think Dan was an alcoholic. - He was.

He wasn't a real alcoholic...

but sometimes he would have, like, 12 beers.

- Hey. - What?

Lev is asking for your number.

Give it to him.

You did just break up with Dan. Today.

Just do it.

I love you, Sophie, even if you love...

your phone that has e-mail more than you love me.

My phone that has e-mail doesn't leave a casserole dish...

in the sink for three days.

What about that time you made a cake?

I love you too.

"“Ahoy, sexy. Are you around this week?"

"Ahoy, sexy"?

That is actually very gay.

Am I nautically sensual?

You're funny.

Lev didn't laugh at any of my jokes.

You are so funny.

Should I text him back...

“Starboard anal sex”?

No.

Tell me the story of us.

Again?

All right, Frances.

We are gonna take over the world.

You'll be this awesomely bitchy publishing mogul.

And you'll be this famous modern dancer...

and I'll publish a really expensive book about you.

That d-bags we make fun of will put on their coffee tables.

And we'll co-own a vacation apartment in Paris.

And we'll have lovers.

- And no children. - And we'll speak at college graduations.

- And honorary degrees. - So many honorary degrees.

- Colleen? - Yeah.

What time's rehearsal?

It's 4:00. Don't forget to bring your shoes.

- Hey. - Jesus!

Sorry. I'm here.

I don't have time to talk. I'm doing the job of three people.

But I can see you after rehearsal.

I read that article in the Times. You must be so happy.

Yeah, thanks. I forget I make my own work sometimes.

Bu! Thanks.

- I usually hate that woman's writing. - Right. Thank you, Frances.

Actually, I had a couple of questions. I'm trying to be proactive about my life.

Ah. Well, I might have some studio space available...

if you want to play with some choreography.

Uh, no, I was wondering if there were...

any more classes at the school I could teach.

I'm a little - I'm kind of broke.

I'll check, but I'm all full up, I think.

I thought so. I'm just proud of myself for asking.

I'll probably be able to use you and some of

the other apprentices for the Christmas show.

- I mean, that's something. - That's great.

I just wanted to say I really look up to you...

and I just - I think you're great.

A beat-up old dancer doing paperwork?

I really need to do all this paperwork now.

I'm running rehearsal today, so I'll see you there.

- Bye. - Bye.

And then he was like, "Rachel, you are cold and mean."

And I was like, “Fuck...

that really hurt my feelings.”

And up over the head.

Boom. Perfect. Over and... shoulder:

Boom, boom, boom. That was great.

Face each other. Look at each other.

Wrap the head around.

That's nice. That's nice.

Move it around.

That's good, Rachel. That's night.

- All night. Understudies, out.